Autism Explanation Attempt

OrangeRKN wrote:

Drumstick wrote:I don't know if there is a term for this (have previously Google'd with little success) but wondered if it's the same for you.

The ability to filter out other conversations is called the Cocktail party effect

Thanks Orange. My hearing is absolutely fine normally but I struggle in the situations I outlined above. I often have to resort to lip-reading; that in tandem with the bits I can can understand means I can usually keep up.

Jezo wrote:It's called super hearing, and it's a power that should be used for the good of the world. Perhaps become some kind of spy?

I thought this video was really great Kerr. It's always informative to get someone's personal perspective & experiences, and I think you put it all in a friendly, conversational way that was very easy to follow.

For me, I've never felt super comfortable explicitly labelling myself as "autistic" or "ADHD", etc., because I don't feel qualified to diagnose myself with a specific condition. But I am definitely neurodivergent. I have social issues have to put in significant effort to handle social situations, typical of autism, and I also have some pretty bad problems with my "executive function," typical of ADHD.

To describe the latter -- it's about the brain's ability to plan and complete tasks. I've been in situations where a bunch of increasingly angry (rightfully! ) people are waiting on me to do the equivalent of push a button, and I've been days late with it, and I know I just have to walk over to the button and push it, and I've been distraught trying to force myself to just go and do it, but I've still been completely unable to. It's very difficult to explain to someone who doesn't experience it. I know it reads as some kind of extreme, hedonistic laziness, but it's not -- it's much more stressful than just doing the task would be.

site23 wrote:I thought this video was really great Kerr. It's always informative to get someone's personal perspective & experiences, and I think you put it all in a friendly, conversational way that was very easy to follow.

For me, I've never felt super comfortable explicitly labelling myself as "autistic" or "ADHD", etc., because I don't feel qualified to diagnose myself with a specific condition. But I am definitely neurodivergent. I have social issues have to put in significant effort to handle social situations, typical of autism, and I also have some pretty bad problems with my "executive function," typical of ADHD.

To describe the latter -- it's about the brain's ability to plan and complete tasks. I've been in situations where a bunch of increasingly angry (rightfully! ) people are waiting on me to do the equivalent of push a button, and I've been days late with it, and I know I just have to walk over to the button and push it, and I've been distraught trying to force myself to just go and do it, but I've still been completely unable to. It's very difficult to explain to someone who doesn't experience it. I know it reads as some kind of extreme, hedonistic laziness, but it's not -- it's much more stressful than just doing the task would be.

Thanks I am glad you liked the video... I will at some stage probably do a bit of a follow up talking about the effects on me on a more personal level, but some of that is also tied to my other issues like Epilepsy and PTSD.

The thing that made me get diagnosed was well I had had issues my whole life and not realised what they were, then I started working with someone with Autism and there was so much common ground, they struggled more than me but I really really understood it all and I think I more went for a diagnosis just to find out and understand myself more. I proberbly lost a lot of help when I was younger with my Epilepsy because of other peoples bad attitudes to it and me hiding it which is something I plan on talking about more..... I used to try my best to hide all my disabilities and issues where as now I am a lot more open.

I do think we are getting better as a society with this kind of stuff but I think for it to go further more people kind of have to get there stories out there and be willing to share...

Thank you for sharing some of what its like for you, its interesting to learn more about how other people deal with there life and its challenges.

kerr9000 wrote:

shy guy 64 wrote:excellent explanation kerr. exactly the sort of thing i would say only more eloquent.

Thank you very much Shyguy glad you liked it

it's always good to hear other people's experiences with autism. i can't even begin to imagine what it was like for you finding that out at that point in your life. i was diagnosed quite young although not officially until i was 13. so i've never had the sense that i was "normal". but hearing other stories does help each other in a way after all it always helps when you find out other people go through similar things. so you know it is hard for us to admit these things but it probably does us good in the long run. so if you ever want to hear my story just ask.

also kudos for calling out rainman. portrayal of autism in pop culture is a bugbear of mine and i could rant about it for ages

Oh yeah I also wanted to say I’ve never questioned the mask, I know others have. But this is the internet age where we have an anti Kirby propagandist speaking through a Cookie Monster rip off so I just saw it as part of your persona. And I can understand wanting to hide your face so I guess I’m trying to say is don’t let peoples confusion bother you

shy guy 64 wrote:Oh yeah I also wanted to say I’ve never questioned the mask, I know others have. But this is the internet age where we have an anti Kirby propagandist speaking through a Cookie Monster rip off so I just saw it as part of your persona. And I can understand wanting to hide your face so I guess I’m trying to say is don’t let peoples confusion bother you

I have always been drawn to masks and glasses when I was like 5 I used to constantly dress as Spiderman even under my school uniform and I'd have the mask in my pocket in case I had to jump into action lol.

I have made videos with my real face showing years ago but it is kind of half a comfort thing and half a persona/ thing to make me stand out, originally I was going to film this video with me talking and was going to pull the mask off to get serious but I decided just having it over light Nintendo game footage kind of made it more accessable for people who might not know me.

Its a good video and Kerr is very good at these things having watched a few of the bits hes posted on here.

But looking at the whole autism/spectrum thing from a different angle - Do you know anyone who isnt on the spectrum? How do they behave, act, etc? Can you say that they have never exhibited behaviors that could be associated with autism?

mcjihge2 wrote:Its a good video and Kerr is very good at these things having watched a few of the bits hes posted on here.

But looking at the whole autism/spectrum thing from a different angle - Do you know anyone who isnt on the spectrum? How do they behave, act, etc? Can you say that they have never exhibited behaviors that could be associated with autism?

None Autistic people might check some of the boxes Autistic people check without being Autistic but they may be something else for example if someone only struggles with communication and shows no other Autistic type trait then they possibly have something which is called social communication disorder. Or if someone only has problems with body movements or control of there body then that could be dyspraxia or a developmental coordination disorder. Or if they only have sensory related issues then they would probably get diagnosed with a sensory processing disorder. The thing with Autism is that its usually a collection of things from various columns, you can be affected more by 1 column than another but usually your exhibiting issues from most if not all of the columns, and you are constantly dealing with them not just at times of stress or confusion or occasionally.... I am hot sure if that explains things a bit more or is just confusing, let me know.

Good work Kerr, thanks for sharing your experience. I think one important thing for everyone is not to wait for somebody to tell you that they have autism, or any condition really, but to show more understanding for the difficulties of others.

Sprouty wrote:Good work Kerr, thanks for sharing your experience. I think one important thing for everyone is not to wait for somebody to tell you that they have autism, or any condition really, but to show more understanding for the difficulties of others.

i don't fancy the odds of that happening

It's like we are hardwired to act that way. It's gonna take a lot of time for us to learn acceptance as a race.

shy guy 64 wrote:

Sprouty wrote:Good work Kerr, thanks for sharing your experience. I think one important thing for everyone is not to wait for somebody to tell you that they have autism, or any condition really, but to show more understanding for the difficulties of others.

i don't fancy the odds of that happening

On a grand scale, no, but talking about things like these can change perceptions of a few at least, so a small win!

Sprouty wrote:

shy guy 64 wrote:

Sprouty wrote:Good work Kerr, thanks for sharing your experience. I think one important thing for everyone is not to wait for somebody to tell you that they have autism, or any condition really, but to show more understanding for the difficulties of others.

i don't fancy the odds of that happening

On a grand scale, no, but talking about things like these can change perceptions of a few at least, so a small win!

Good point

I'm going to make another video at some point and what I'm about to type will be a big part of it, but basically we are conditioned to see a lot of things the way we see them and that needs challenging....

I used to try to hide all the things that made me different and this started because in junior school a girl used to have epileptic fits and a lot of the other kids would call her a spaz and Mongol and stuff like that...I was like 6 and didn't like it but didn't stand up for her cause I was young and scared.... Not long after this I started having night time fits, I started waking up in hospital feeling ill and terrified, a doctor there tried to diagnose me with Epilepsy and I lost it completely I mean crying begging screaming, I didn't want the world to treat me like that girl, the doctor diagnosed me with benign childhood seizures of the night and put me on pills and I hid it from everyone, only my immediate family knew..... Even when I was in college and uni I never admired it, even when I had a managerial job I never told people, if I had a giant fit and went in looking bad it was a hangover, if I stayed off it was a stomach bug.... This didn't change till after I'd had PTSD and a complete breakdown.

To this day I still feel guilt over not speaking up for that little girl when I was 6 and if I saw her as an adult I'd appologise

I think this is why viewpoints need to be challenged and that's why I no longer want to hide who I am no matter what it means.

that is a heavy story kerr, but i'm with you on challenging viewpoints