Delivery of knives bought online to be banned in the UK

The strawberry float is a zombie knife?

Skarjo wrote:The strawberry float is a zombie knife?

A knife that has been killed, but comes back to eat other knives.

I thought zombie knives had been banned a few years ago anyway?

Skarjo wrote:The strawberry float is a zombie knife?

A zombie knife (also known as a zombie killer knife or zombie slayer knife) is a type of knife. It is defined in English law as a blade with

- a cutting edge;
- a serrated edge; and
- images or words (whether on the blade or handle) that suggest that it is to be used for the purpose of violence.

Moggy wrote:
Skarjo wrote:The strawberry float is a zombie knife?

A knife that has been killed, but comes back to eat other knives.

Ah right, one where you remove the handle or destroy the grip.

From photos I keep seeing they tend to have holes in, are considerably larger than a normal knife, and feature an elaborate handle. Apparently many of them aren't real knives but more like TV props, albeit just as dangerous.

They should just bring back stop and search and anyone found carrying a knife is jailed for an automatic 6 months.

Skarjo wrote:
Moggy wrote:
Skarjo wrote:The strawberry float is a zombie knife?

A knife that has been killed, but comes back to eat other knives.

Ah right, one where you remove the handle or destroy the grip.

Being serious for a moment, banning zombie knives will leave us very vulnerable when the dead rise up. Our only protection will be Simon Pegg’s record collection. :dread:

KK wrote:From photos I keep seeing they tend to have holes in, are considerably larger than a normal knife, and feature an elaborate handle. Apparently many of them aren't real knives but more like TV props, albeit just as dangerous.

They should just bring back stop and search and anyone found carrying a knife is jailed for an automatic 6 months.

What if they’ve just been shopping for a cutlery set?

Not sure the criminals would be quite as nimble carrying an entire cutlery set clanking around in their pants.

They did ban them a couple of years ago: https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-37080682

Now they'll be double-banned. :datass:

KK wrote:Not sure the criminals would be quite as nimble carrying an entire cutlery set clanking around in their pants.

Well no, but you said 6 months for carrying a knife, not 6 months for having a knife in your pants.

The trouble with automatic sentences of the type you describe is that it misses all of the common sense exceptions that we would all like in a law and it ignores circumstances that may make it worthwhile to give a more lenient sentence.

Moggy wrote:
KK wrote:Not sure the criminals would be quite as nimble carrying an entire cutlery set clanking around in their pants.

Well no, but you said 6 months for carrying a knife, not 6 months for having a knife in your pants.

The trouble with automatic sentences of the type you describe is that it misses all of the common sense exceptions that we would all like in a law and it ignores circumstances that may make it worthwhile to give a more lenient sentence.

Nobody needs to be carrying a knife that quite clearly isn't about to be used to eat dinner with. Nobody is walking out of Tesco with an unsealed knife. There is no circumstance a person would have a lone knife on them.

KK wrote:
Moggy wrote:
KK wrote:Not sure the criminals would be quite as nimble carrying an entire cutlery set clanking around in their pants.

Well no, but you said 6 months for carrying a knife, not 6 months for having a knife in your pants.

The trouble with automatic sentences of the type you describe is that it misses all of the common sense exceptions that we would all like in a law and it ignores circumstances that may make it worthwhile to give a more lenient sentence.

Nobody needs to be carrying a knife that quite clearly isn't about to be used to eat dinner with. Nobody is walking out of Tesco with an unsealed knife. There is no circumstance a person would have a lone knife on them.

You see how your blanket “anyone carrying a knife should get 6 months” has now become more nuanced?

There are plenty of reasons people might carry knives. Fishermen, farmers and handymen for instance.

"But officer, I need this machete as I lost my gun"

That's probably the biggest reason I hate London - you can't move for all the knife-wielding fishermen :roll:

Preezy wrote:That's probably the biggest reason I hate London - you can't move for all the knife-wielding fishermen

Who mentioned London? KK couldn’t think of a single reason why somebody might have a knife on them. When there are lots of reasons people might have one.

Bizarre pedanticism.

Moggy wrote:
Preezy wrote:That's probably the biggest reason I hate London - you can't move for all the knife-wielding fishermen

Who mentioned London? KK couldn’t think of a single reason why somebody might have a knife on them. When there are lots of reasons people might have one.

I mentioned London, it's the nearest city to where I live. But alright, I also hate Birmingham and Coventry because of all the knife-wielding farmers

I think in reality, police officers are smart enough to tell the difference between a fisherman carrying a knife (do they really carry knives? I'm not convinced but ok I'll allow it for this) and a hoodlum. The boat is a big giveaway as well.

Moggy wrote:
Skarjo wrote:
Moggy wrote:
Skarjo wrote:The strawberry float is a zombie knife?

A knife that has been killed, but comes back to eat other knives.

Ah right, one where you remove the handle or destroy the grip.

Being serious for a moment, banning zombie knives will leave us very vulnerable when the dead rise up. Our only protection will be Simon Pegg’s record collection.

I can't imagine having to fend off the undead with my record selection.

"Carly Rae Jepsen?"

"I like it"

KK wrote:Bizarre pedanticism.

Hardly. If you are calling for people to be automatically put in prison for 6 months, then you ought to be aware of the countless exceptions that should be in such a law.

It’s kind of important to ensure that a law is fair and only targets the dangerous criminals.

But sure, it’s much easier to just think of it in Sun headline terms.

Delivery of knives bought online to be banned in the UK

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