Depression, Anxiety, or other Mental Health Conditions

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False
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PostRe: Depression, Anxiety, or other Mental Health Conditions
by False » Wed Oct 17, 2018 11:19 am

thats ace

was that on the nhs?

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Seven Posers Posing
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PostRe: Depression, Anxiety, or other Mental Health Conditions
by Seven Posers Posing » Wed Oct 17, 2018 11:39 am

False wrote:thats ace

was that on the nhs?


Sadly not. It's pretty expensive, but my company paid for it. Very good of them.

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PostRe: Depression, Anxiety, or other Mental Health Conditions
by False » Wed Oct 17, 2018 11:41 am

I have private medical too

would you mind pm'ing me the details please

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PostRe: Depression, Anxiety, or other Mental Health Conditions
by jawafour » Wed Oct 17, 2018 12:38 pm

Poser wrote:...Results far in excess of what I was expecting. again next week but she says that might be the only other session I need...

That's terrific news, Poser - it's great that you've already experienced an improvement in your situation! I hope that the learnings can continue to deliver.

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PostRe: Depression, Anxiety, or other Mental Health Conditions
by Green Gecko » Wed Oct 17, 2018 1:56 pm

Well one probably CBT psychologist suggested dramatic things like I should probably leave my job at the time and less dramatic things like I should make sure I play guitar once a day.. But they were right.

Anyway I haven't been recommended any services yet but my dad might actually help me cover the cost of some private treatments, where do I even start looking for good therapists in my area??

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PostRe: Depression, Anxiety, or other Mental Health Conditions
by Minoru » Tue Oct 23, 2018 12:10 am

I went to speak to someone at Mind today. I knew I probably wouldn't handle it very well, but it feels a bit like reality has punched me in the face, because oh boy was I the epitome of Not Calm.

She asked about my sexuality right at the start for the form and I've never actually told anyone irl other than my mum. I guess I knew it would bother me if it came up but I didn't realise how much and that just really upset me? Like, I am clearly not okay with this and I want to be but if I can hardly even say it to a stranger who couldn't give a strawberry float, I'm obviously not.

The whole thing was very stressful and made me feel so pathetic and I feel guilty for talking about my family and maybe giving the impression that things are worse than they are. I wasn't really honest about my depression either.

She put me on the list to do their anxiety course in the new year and gave me contact details for their lgbt branch and a peer support group but I don't know, it seems an awfully long time away and all very difficult and I don't know what I'm going to do.

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PostRe: Depression, Anxiety, or other Mental Health Conditions
by kerr9000 » Tue Oct 23, 2018 10:41 am

All respect to you for going Minoru , it can be hard when you know they will ask things you'd rather they didn't.

I can really relate to the feeling bad about talking about your family bit. My mum was always super super vocal and loving before she died but my dad's a bit quiet and kind of stern , when I had therapy I ended up talking about how he has never told me he loves me or that he is proud of me, as soon as I'd left I felt like a back stabbing git.

The thing to remember though is therapy is for you and about how you and how you feel and you need to focus on getting stuff out for your benefit.

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PostRe: Depression, Anxiety, or other Mental Health Conditions
by kerr9000 » Sat Nov 10, 2018 2:31 pm

I think this is probably my first time posting in here to say I feel like crap.... I have PTSD and at times life is kind of more about holding that down to try and function as much as possible, last night I had a raging argument with my older brother it really wasn't good it was him that started it and he said some really bad things which really upset me, basically went on about if our mother was still alive she would disown me and hate me etc there's nothing I can think of worse than him saying all this crap because all it makes me want to do is see my mum and hug my mum and ask her what she thinks of me and obviously I cant. Add on to this my fiancee heard some of it and some of what he went on to say upset her so much shes basically said she makes my life worse and wants to pull herself out of the picture for awhile. I am hoping with all of my heart that give it a few weeks and she doesn't feel hurt and realizes that he is just a prick.

All of my life my brother has had pops at me and made out that he is better than me and I haven't achieved enough, he always makes out he knows better and he does better , even to the degree that in spite him never having had a child he tries to tell me parenting decisions of mine are wrong... I just need to shut him out of my life because I firmly believe if someone makes your life worse you have to get them out of your life

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PostRe: Depression, Anxiety, or other Mental Health Conditions
by Green Gecko » Sat Nov 10, 2018 6:33 pm

Siblings can be like that. Sometimes it's better just to accept their attitude is not going to change and they don't need to be involved so don't let them in anymore.

It's a very unfair and manipulative thing to speak for someone who isn't there never mind passed away. If someone is upset with you it remains with them and is often more about them than you anyway.

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PostRe: Depression, Anxiety, or other Mental Health Conditions
by kerr9000 » Sat Nov 10, 2018 7:29 pm

Green Gecko wrote:Siblings can be like that. Sometimes it's better just to accept their attitude is not going to change and they don't need to be involved so don't let them in anymore.

It's a very unfair and manipulative thing to speak for someone who isn't there never mind passed away. If someone is upset with you it remains with them and is often more about them than you anyway.


Thanks Gecko, your words are much appreciated.

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PostRe: Depression, Anxiety, or other Mental Health Conditions
by Inga from Sweden » Sun Nov 11, 2018 10:15 pm

kerr9000 wrote:I think this is probably my first time posting in here to say I feel like crap.... I have PTSD and at times life is kind of more about holding that down to try and function as much as possible, last night I had a raging argument with my older brother it really wasn't good it was him that started it and he said some really bad things which really upset me, basically went on about if our mother was still alive she would disown me and hate me etc there's nothing I can think of worse than him saying all this crap because all it makes me want to do is see my mum and hug my mum and ask her what she thinks of me and obviously I cant. Add on to this my fiancee heard some of it and some of what he went on to say upset her so much shes basically said she makes my life worse and wants to pull herself out of the picture for awhile. I am hoping with all of my heart that give it a few weeks and she doesn't feel hurt and realizes that he is just a prick.

All of my life my brother has had pops at me and made out that he is better than me and I haven't achieved enough, he always makes out he knows better and he does better , even to the degree that in spite him never having had a child he tries to tell me parenting decisions of mine are wrong... I just need to shut him out of my life because I firmly believe if someone makes your life worse you have to get them out of your life


Is he acting out of jealousy of what you have and your achievements? His remarks about your mother are perhaps transference of his own inadequacies. Until he accepts, realises and improves his own situation he will continue to act like a dick toward you. Keep the things that you like close to you.

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PostRe: Depression, Anxiety, or other Mental Health Conditions
by kerr9000 » Sun Nov 11, 2018 10:56 pm

mcjihge2 wrote:
kerr9000 wrote:I think this is probably my first time posting in here to say I feel like crap.... I have PTSD and at times life is kind of more about holding that down to try and function as much as possible, last night I had a raging argument with my older brother it really wasn't good it was him that started it and he said some really bad things which really upset me, basically went on about if our mother was still alive she would disown me and hate me etc there's nothing I can think of worse than him saying all this crap because all it makes me want to do is see my mum and hug my mum and ask her what she thinks of me and obviously I cant. Add on to this my fiancee heard some of it and some of what he went on to say upset her so much shes basically said she makes my life worse and wants to pull herself out of the picture for awhile. I am hoping with all of my heart that give it a few weeks and she doesn't feel hurt and realizes that he is just a prick.

All of my life my brother has had pops at me and made out that he is better than me and I haven't achieved enough, he always makes out he knows better and he does better , even to the degree that in spite him never having had a child he tries to tell me parenting decisions of mine are wrong... I just need to shut him out of my life because I firmly believe if someone makes your life worse you have to get them out of your life


Is he acting out of jealousy of what you have and your achievements? His remarks about your mother are perhaps transference of his own inadequacies. Until he accepts, realises and improves his own situation he will continue to act like a dick toward you. Keep the things that you like close to you.


In honesty I don't know what he acts out over , he is a genius but very full of himself with it, he is successful and pretty rich because of it, he doesnt have any children though and I think he is perhaps jealous of that, back when she was alive he was jealous of me and our mum having a very strong bond. He would make comments that I had been a coward and never grown up because I never moved more than 3 miles away from our parents, that my degree was a sham because id done it while living at home and moan about how I visited mum every day on the way home from work and stuff.. Whenever someone is mad with him or doesn't like him he seems to think its because he is gay and doesn't see how much the family supported him and how little we cared about that. The guy has bags and bags of qualifications in mental health and yet seems to have next to no empathy and id argue actually uses what he knows in a manipulative way.

Things have actually gotten worse today, he has been trying to contact my daughter while I was at work (shes 16) and as she wouldn't answer the phone to him or text back because shes mad at how he has treated me, he has basically gone on to contact our Dad to say if she doesn't talk to him now then shes being wrote out of his will and stuff, she tried to be diplomatic and say she needs time to think but it was a talk to me now or this is it kind of thing, shes pretty much told my dad to tell him to shove it. I feel sorry for my dad ending up in the middle of this, I only have one kid but I cant imagine having multiples and them fighting... I am one of three and basically the other two have had fights verbal and occasionally physical my whole life (there 10 and 12 years older than me) and my middle brother has sort of diapered and moved away and now there's only me the youngest and the oldest dads left with and he gets this from us. Add to this things have gotten worse between me and my fiancee because she hasnt taken all of this well, I seriously felt yesterday like given some time me and her would be OK but the bit I have talked with her today it feels very very much like the end and I really don't want it to be, but its looking pretty darn hopeless.

I had to go to work today and it was bloody horrible because i had to fake being happy and cracking jokes like I would usually do because I just couldn't cope with letting anyone see that I was feeling down and vulnerable.

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Squinty
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PostRe: Depression, Anxiety, or other Mental Health Conditions
by Squinty » Mon Nov 12, 2018 8:47 am

Your brother sounds like a complete asshat. I would try not to let anything he says get to you. That's not on, using your mum to strengthen his view.

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PostRe: Depression, Anxiety, or other Mental Health Conditions
by Gemini73 » Mon Nov 12, 2018 9:15 am

kerr9000 wrote:I think this is probably my first time posting in here to say I feel like crap.... I have PTSD and at times life is kind of more about holding that down to try and function as much as possible, last night I had a raging argument with my older brother it really wasn't good it was him that started it and he said some really bad things which really upset me, basically went on about if our mother was still alive she would disown me and hate me etc there's nothing I can think of worse than him saying all this crap because all it makes me want to do is see my mum and hug my mum and ask her what she thinks of me and obviously I cant. Add on to this my fiancee heard some of it and some of what he went on to say upset her so much shes basically said she makes my life worse and wants to pull herself out of the picture for awhile. I am hoping with all of my heart that give it a few weeks and she doesn't feel hurt and realizes that he is just a prick.

All of my life my brother has had pops at me and made out that he is better than me and I haven't achieved enough, he always makes out he knows better and he does better , even to the degree that in spite him never having had a child he tries to tell me parenting decisions of mine are wrong... I just need to shut him out of my life because I firmly believe if someone makes your life worse you have to get them out of your life


That's a horrible situation to be in, but your closing remark is clearly the best solution for all concerned - eject him from your life. It won't be easy, but you'll have to tell him straight, face to face, that you no longer want him involved in any way with you and your family.

As for him harassing your daughter? That's crossing the line and reason enough alone to cut him out altogether.

“But I don't want to go among mad people,” Alice remarked. “Oh, you can't help that,” said the Cat: “we're all mad here".
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PostRe: Depression, Anxiety, or other Mental Health Conditions
by Green Gecko » Mon Nov 12, 2018 10:35 am

It does sound an awful lot like someone gets off on preying on what they perceive to be a weaker version of themselves. Sometimes you have brothers you want to love you but at the end of the day they are just bullies.

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PostRe: Depression, Anxiety, or other Mental Health Conditions
by kerr9000 » Mon Nov 12, 2018 10:50 am

Thanks for your support guys :)

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PostRe: Depression, Anxiety, or other Mental Health Conditions
by Minoru » Mon Nov 12, 2018 11:11 am

I went to see the doctor about an ear infection the other day and she seemed nice so I made an appointment to go speak to her about my anxiety on Thursday. I'm panicking. I don't know if I'll be able to talk about this and I don't know what I'll say, it all seems so ridiculous. I don't know if I'll be able to be honest and get across how much this effects me and if I do I'll sound utterly pathetic. I don't know if anything she could offer would actually help or what I want from this. I really don't want to do this and I don't want it on my record but I don't know what else to do anymore.

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PostRe: Depression, Anxiety, or other Mental Health Conditions
by Harry Ellis » Mon Nov 12, 2018 11:22 am

Minoru wrote:I went to see the doctor about an ear infection the other day and she seemed nice so I made an appointment to go speak to her about my anxiety on Thursday. I'm panicking.

That is a completely natural reaction. It would actually be abnormal if you weren't panicking.

Minoru wrote:I don't know if I'll be able to talk about this and I don't know what I'll say, it all seems so ridiculous. I don't know if I'll be able to be honest and get across how much this effects me and if I do I'll sound utterly pathetic.

Minoru, they want to help people and given that the number of mental health patients is increasing on a colossal scale, they will take what you say very seriously but you must be completely honest about what affects you, how and why.

Minoru wrote:I don't know if anything she could offer would actually help or what I want from this. I really don't want to do this and I don't want it on my record but I don't know what else to do anymore.

There are plenty of routes for you to go down, it will be your choice which if any you choose to follow and you won't be forced into anything.

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PostRe: Depression, Anxiety, or other Mental Health Conditions
by OrangeReindeer » Mon Nov 12, 2018 11:33 am

You'll never know how it will go until you do it, but from anyone I've known talking to a GP has always been a positive step. It's normal to have reservations about it and your concerns are not stupid, but they are probably being greatly exacerbated by the anxiety, which is what you should remember. Just talk honestly and don't worry about being judged - that's not what the GP is there to do. They are there to help you, and you've almost done what can be the most difficult part - reaching out for that help. Try not to think too much about it until Thursday and I'm sure it'll go well!

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PostRe: Depression, Anxiety, or other Mental Health Conditions
by Minoru » Mon Nov 12, 2018 3:05 pm

Thank you both for the encouragement.

I'm trying not to worry about it and I guess logically I know it's the best thing to do right now, I just feel a bit like it's all making excuses for being lazy and incompetent and if I could just get my life together...etc, etc.

I'm also worried what to say if she asks if something has made things worse recently, because I really don't want to talk about that and the anxiety has been a problem I've been ignoring long before all this, it's just made the immediate situation more difficult.

I also don't know how my family will react if she suggests medication. I know it shouldn't matter but arguing about it would not be what I need and I'd be very surprised if mum just accepted it.

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