If I was Prime Minister

PostRe: If I was Prime Minister by **That** » Wed Nov 26, 2008 5:40 pm

$ilva $hadow wrote::lol: You'd have to clone yourself and then win the votes to become the MP of your constituent and then vote en masse as an MP in the House of Commons together to get any of that through.

Stage a terrorist attack. In the panic, pass an enabling law. Hitler-style.

PostRe: If I was Prime Minister by **gaminglegend** » Wed Nov 26, 2008 5:42 pm

FishFingers wrote:I'm serious. Most of the influence that he or she has stems from being the leader of a majority party than anything else. If the situation in the Scottish Parliament was repeated in the Commons then the Prime Minister would be much weaker.

everyone already knows its just a little fun.

If I was Primeminister I would:
- Add another Bank Holiday based either around Britain or the Armed Forces.
- Change to the Union Jack to include

in the middle.
- Make the driving test much harder, consider a standard driving course that includes skid control etc..
- Make all national newspapers run their main headline as "The Champ is Here!!!" on my election day.
- Give knighthoods to all originals of GRCADE.
- Overhall the entire legal system, streamline certain laws as there are too many and they are too indepth.
- Double the countries police force.
- Automatically allow Northampton Town planning permission for Stadium expansion.
- Try to do something about the amount of stupid human rights, equal rights and health & safety legislation that is crippling some firms around the country.

If I were a Prime Minister
Even just for a day
I’d roll outta bed in the morning
And throw on what I wanted then go
Drink beer with the guys
And chase after girls
I’d kick it with who I wated
And I’d never get confronted for it.
Cause they’d stick up for me.

PostRe: If I was Prime Minister by **Fazarelli** » Wed Nov 26, 2008 8:14 pm

RogueLeader wrote:I would:

Hike up the tax on cigarettes and plug the money into hospitals and schools.
Make people take a walking test, otherwise they're not allowed on the pavement. No sudden stopping, no dilly-dallying, and always give people room to walk - make a gesture to show that you're giving them at least a little room.
Provide free wireless for major cities.

strawberry floatin' right! And it's usually old twats who do it, too (I don't mean the semi-crippled, they've got an excuse, probably the only strawberry floatin' excuse). The ignorance of people in this country is strawberry floatin' outrageous. People walking 5 wide along a pavement expect a lone person to walk round them! strawberry floatin' gobshites! [/rant over]

PostRe: If I was Prime Minister by **jj_hunsecker** » Wed Nov 26, 2008 8:50 pm

If I were Prime minister I would...
quit.

Seriously, apart from maybe being manager of Newcastle United, is there a more thankless task? Politicians get it gooseberry fool in this country.

PostRe: If I was Prime Minister by **Jax** » Wed Nov 26, 2008 9:09 pm

I would get a cabinet that actually knows what's what.

Because the current one certainly doesn't.

PostRe: If I was Prime Minister by **Extralife** » Wed Nov 26, 2008 10:55 pm

If I became PM I'd have to conclude that democracy is worthless and announce a dictatorship to protect people from their own stupidity.

PostRe: If I was Prime Minister by **1cmanny1** » Wed Nov 26, 2008 11:15 pm

if i were pm i couldn't do anything.

only go and shake britains pm's hand.

PostRe: If I was Prime Minister by **Lex-Man** » Wed Nov 26, 2008 11:23 pm

Create a dictatorship massively increase military and science spending and try and take over the world.

PostRe: If I was Prime Minister by **PuppetBoy** » Wed Nov 26, 2008 11:27 pm

lex-man wrote:Create a dictatorship massively increase military and science spending and try and take over the world.

When I was young enough to be in primary school an uncle of mine asked me what I wanted to grow up to be, and I said dictator.

I'll be honest, I still wouldn't say no.

PostRe: If I was Prime Minister by **Alvin Flummux** » Thu Nov 27, 2008 2:40 am

I would:

Have MI6 abduct Nick Griffin and 'drop him off' in a bus station in Iran, with equipment in his pockets implicating him as a spy.
Commission the BBC to make a political equivalent of Dragons Den, where budding politicians pose various 'ideas' to the Dragons, like raising x tax or something.
Re-introduce the 10p rate of tax.
Abandon the massive spending plans and lower taxes for everyone while pulling together a coalition of politicians from across the political spectrum to ensure strict fiscal discipline is maintained. Best way to boost consumer spending is an across the board tax cut.
Give ITV the heave ho.

PostRe: If I was Prime Minister by **Moggy** » Thu Nov 27, 2008 10:39 am

I if was in charge then I would quickly move to give myself dictatorial powers. I would then:

I would drop all taxes on cigarettes and increase the tax on the health Nazis to compensate.

Everybody in the county would be forced to spray CFC-containing aerosols into the air each day in order to heat the place up a bit. With no tax on cigarettes and a warm climate, the Spanish would flock to Britain to create their own little Spain on our beaches.

I would pass a law that an MI6 spy must follow Cal around at all times of the day. Everybody else would then be forced to laugh at him when he says that the Government has gone too far.

Bicycles would be outlawed, unless they have an alien in the basket that can make them fly.

My boss would be taken to the Tower of London for a "quiet word".

Our reservoirs would be upgraded to ensure that the cold tap produced water of a minimum of 45% alcohol. The hot tap would produce chocolate milkshake.

Any supporters of Bristol Rovers FC would be arrested as pirates and deported to Somalia to live on a giant cargo ship.

And that’s just the start!

PostRe: If I was Prime Minister by **Roonmastor** » Thu Nov 27, 2008 10:52 am

I would use my position of power to get laid.

Roonmastor wrote:I would use my position of power to get laid.

If it can work for John Prescott it can work for anyone.

PostRe: If I was Prime Minister by **TYSON** » Thu Nov 27, 2008 11:38 am

Get rid of copper coins

Have my own salute and wear a military uniform

PostRe: If I was Prime Minister by **akijones** » Thu Nov 27, 2008 11:41 am

Fatal Exception wrote:I'd make Scotland and Wales officially provinces of England, just to see the look on their faces.

Civil War it is then if FE becomes PM

akijones wrote:
Fatal Exception wrote:I'd make Scotland and Wales officially provinces of England, just to see the look on their faces.

Civil War it is then if FE becomes PM

Wouldn't happen. People are already too apathetic to question the government. Just look at the gooseberry fool they get away with now.

PostRe: If I was Prime Minister by **Mr Thropwimp** » Thu Nov 27, 2008 12:14 pm

Fatal Exception wrote:
akijones wrote:
Fatal Exception wrote:I'd make Scotland and Wales officially provinces of England, just to see the look on their faces.

Civil War it is then if FE becomes PM

Wouldn't happen. People are already too apathetic to question the government. Just look at the gooseberry fool they get away with now.

There'd be a revolt on Facebook, so you'll have to ban the internet.

Charles Manson wrote:
Fatal Exception wrote:
akijones wrote:
Fatal Exception wrote:I'd make Scotland and Wales officially provinces of England, just to see the look on their faces.

Civil War it is then if FE becomes PM

Wouldn't happen. People are already too apathetic to question the government. Just look at the gooseberry fool they get away with now.

There'd be a revolt on Facebook, so you'll have to ban the internet.

Only in Scotland and Wales, most of them wouldn't even notice.

If I was Prime Minister

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