Hi folks,
I'm finally back from my brief sojourn around southern Thailand for the past 12 days. What fun.
I went on holiday with my older brother and his wife (staying at a private fishing resort close to Krabi) but just a few days in, late one night in a dive bar at the popular tourist beach town of Ao Nang, I quite literally got picked up and stolen away by an especially insistent Ladyboy, who appeared to have taken an instant liking to me.
I spent the next four days travelling around the dirt roads and byways of southern Thailand on the back seat of her motorbike (no crash helmets!), staying in various hotels, dining out and generally behaving badly. She's half my age (25), comes with the complete package (still a boy, but also a fine looking girl if you understand), a beautiful brown slender figure and a tenuous grasp of English just good enough for the both of us to get by on (conversation wasn't especially high on the agenda, as it happened, so no worries).
Nothing like seeing a country in the company of a native who knows all the local ins and outs. These 'girls' sure get things done - everything just a phone call away, every arrangement made in advance of arrival, etc. She seemed to know everyone, everywhere. I honestly felt like her toy boy, some kind of fashion accessory. Crazy days and nights ensued. Not a lot of sleep was done.
'You no customer', she kept telling me.
'You no customer.' So I didn't pay her for sex - she wouldn't have taken it, anyway. Instead, I paid for the accommodations and meals; she paid for almost everything else, including gifts for me and my brother and sister in-law. Apparently, and according to her, I'm
'not like others' who frequent those bars in Ao Nang's shadier districts. Of course (perhaps inevitably?) she wants to marry me, have a family, a business and all the things you might imagine. She loved the fact I don't drink alcohol, for instance. That immediately set me apart from the crowds of loud, obnoxious, drunken white western tourists swarming through the Ladyboy bars (also a surprising amount of Asian men looking for a good time girl/boy). Also, I'm not a fat slob - she also appreciated that (couldn't keep from putting her hands all over me, actually). It's
nice to feel appreciated for the effort you make to keep yourself in some sort of good shape. I recommend it.
After five days and nights of this I finally found my way back to my brother and his wife. We all spent a last night in town with my new friend, took a meal together beside the coast and then I reluctantly had to say my goodbyes to my slender young Asian beauty and return to the original resort I was supposed to be staying at to pack my bags for the flight the next morning back to Blighty.
Oh yeah, I also did some diving, snorkeling, boat trips around the islands, shopping and sightseeing. You know - normal holiday stuff. God alone knows how I found the time though...
Here's a few snaps of the beautiful scenery I saw - no pics of my girl/boy friend, though. You don't get those: I'm keeping them just for me.
This is a shot of the main road in Ao Nang - lovely little beach town. The Ladboy bars are all up that street, off to the left. The place comes alive after midnight - absolutely heaving with tourists looking for a 'good time girl'.
Out amongst the beautiful islands off the coast...snorkeling, swimming, etc.
A small makeshift bar on one of the tiny islands...
Back on the beach at the end of the day in Ao Nang...
And, of course, Tescos, Ao Nang style...because.
I'll probably go back to Ao Nang. That's a lifestyle one could easily get very accustomed to. Perhaps too easily...
*There is a bar just outside Ao Nang actually called 'Ting Tong'. Driving past it, we asked our local taxi driver in Ao Nang what 'Ting Tong' means. Turns out it's Thai slang for 'crazy little missy' - they all think it's hilarious. Absolutely true.