Last film you watched and your rating: The Directors Cut

Fed up talking videogames? Why?
User avatar
Godzilla
Member
Joined in 2008

PostRe: Last film you watched and your rating: The Directors Cut
by Godzilla » Sat May 13, 2017 4:04 pm

Alien Covenant - 2/10

Wow. So this will be a long review/rant as it's genuinely a cluster strawberry float. Spoilers will be spoilered.

I'd rate Aliens 10/10, Alien 10/10 Alien 3 Directors Cut 7/10. Along Resurrection 5/10 . Prometheus 7/10. avp is crap buy fun crap, avp uncut is fun crap 6/10.

So...... Ridley Scott needs to retire after this.

It's basically movie tropes bingo.

They remove all practical effects and use 100% CGI, well lit CGI. Which in a sci Fi movie would be good but in horror looks awful. Each cgi enemy is worst than the last and there is an arms out stretched moment which should be in some 80s ET Knock off.

The plot is beyond gooseberry fool and I called each twist and kill way before the moment they occured.

The ending and shock moment is no shock as it belongs in strawberry floating Sunset Beach or hollyoaks.

The positive reviews are from critics who don't know horror or sci Fi and because they see the name Ridley Scott. If this was made by someone else and they did what has been done to the franchise then it would be getting horrendous reviews.

The changes to the alien, the terrible writing, it feels like a student film with a big budget.

I was bored and the last section was so sign posted and so bloody dull. It's CGI wank and it's all just a gooseberry fool re hash to better movies.

Only thing I liked was the potential for a very good villian but it went panto by the end. I can't imagine how God awful the next one will be.

Spoilers
Alien showed us how to make an Android scary. This is star wars Episode 3 villian level of panto shite.

My God the CGI, face burster and back burster both terrible.

The breathe on the nose of a horse scene , looked like an outtake from doom.

Speed up tht incubation period, everyone hated that in AVP.

CGI alien crushed in a metal hand. Why not just paint it yellow and fully piss over Aliens.


A sad film, even if you remove the title and see it as stand alone sci Fi movie..... It's forgettable I can remember 4 characters names.

For once the spoiler heavy trailer was better than the film.
Wish my image sig would work
User avatar
Godzilla
Member
Joined in 2008

PostRe: Last film you watched and your rating: The Directors Cut
by Godzilla » Sat May 13, 2017 4:08 pm

Ironhide wrote:The Descent -8/10

That was far more tense than I expected, mainly due to the horribly claustrophobic setting in which everything takes place.

Some of the characters were annoying as strawberry float though.


Sequel is worth a look too. Not a patch on the original but has a few good moments.
Wish my image sig would work
User avatar
Nibble
Member
Joined in 2008
Location: Big Tuna

PostRe: Last film you watched and your rating: The Directors Cut
by Nibble » Sat May 13, 2017 7:20 pm

Alien Covenant

3/10

Can't believe that after the flak Prometheus (deservedly) received for the crew members' ridiculously WTF actions/decisions, they've only gone and done the same thing again. Can't even blame Lindelof this time.
User avatar
chalkitdown
Member
Member
Joined in 2008
Location: Cork

PostRe: Last film you watched and your rating: The Directors Cut
by chalkitdown » Sat May 13, 2017 8:14 pm

Am I the only one who liked it or what? :slol:
User avatar
Hexx
Member
Joined in 2008

PostRe: Last film you watched and your rating: The Directors Cut
by Hexx » Sat May 13, 2017 9:20 pm

chalkitdown wrote:Am I the only one who liked it or what? :slol:


Where by any chance very very very drunk when you saw it?
User avatar
Death's Head
Member
Joined in 2009

PostRe: Last film you watched and your rating: The Directors Cut
by Death's Head » Sat May 13, 2017 11:10 pm

Star Trek - Beyond. Wasn't sure what this was going to be like as there seemed to be some hate on here. Checked IMDB and it scored fairly well so gave it a chance.

Found it enjoyable so not really sure why people have a problem. Solid 7 at least.
Yes?
BOR
Member
Joined in 2008

PostRe: Last film you watched and your rating: The Directors Cut
by BOR » Sat May 13, 2017 11:44 pm

chalkitdown wrote:Am I the only one who liked it or what? :slol:

I'm going to see it tomorrow so hopefully I'll like it.
"The job is done, and the bitch is dead."
User avatar
Pell
Member
Joined in 2008
Location: The scarlet fields of Can'-Ka No Rey
Contact:

PostRe: Last film you watched and your rating: The Directors Cut
by Pell » Sun May 14, 2017 12:43 am

Alien Covenant - 2/10

What a strawberry floating shambles. Not scary, not tense, and not even interesting. The researcher woman would have made a far better lead - at least there was something to her.

gooseberry fools over Alien's legacy and managed to be worse than Prometheus. Was properly yawning in the cinema. Life absolutely destroyed it this year.
BOR
Member
Joined in 2008

PostRe: Last film you watched and your rating: The Directors Cut
by BOR » Sun May 14, 2017 2:44 pm

Just got back from Vue and I saw Alien Covenant.

I have to say I'm going to the Covenant ship with chalky as a crew and I agreed with his view. I thought it was great and easily the third best in the series.

Fassbender was awesome though.

8/10
"The job is done, and the bitch is dead."
User avatar
Floex
Member
Joined in 2008
Contact:

PostRe: Last film you watched and your rating: The Directors Cut
by Floex » Sun May 14, 2017 2:47 pm

Seeing it tonight but refuse to believe it's worse than AvP. Majority of you have lowered my expectations so here's hoping for the best :lol:
User avatar
Memento Mori
Member
Joined in 2008
AKA: Emperor Mori

PostRe: Last film you watched and your rating: The Directors Cut
by Memento Mori » Sun May 14, 2017 2:55 pm

Alien Covenant- 8/10

Enjoyed that a lot. It's an overall better film than Prometheus but there's nothing as good as Prometheus' standout scene.

I burst out laughing in the cinema at David's "It's perfectly safe" line. As with Promeheus he was easily the best character.
User avatar
chalkitdown
Member
Member
Joined in 2008
Location: Cork

PostRe: Last film you watched and your rating: The Directors Cut
by chalkitdown » Sun May 14, 2017 3:16 pm

Mori & BOR :wub:

The fingering line also got a good chuckle out of me.
User avatar
Denster
Member
Member
Joined in 2008

PostRe: Last film you watched and your rating: The Directors Cut
by Denster » Sun May 14, 2017 5:35 pm

There's not a chance it's worse than AVsP
Love list


Super Dragon 64
User avatar
Peter Crisp
Member
Joined in 2008

PostRe: Last film you watched and your rating: The Directors Cut
by Peter Crisp » Sun May 14, 2017 6:08 pm

I keep thinking about Alien Covenant and I just can't shake what a colossal disappointment it all was.
The story was just so weak and the sheer stupidity of the crew was just staggering. They blunder about on a planet they believe to uncharted (apart from a distress beacon from what they think was a crashed ship) and take less precautions than people on here would take just going into a strange new pub. Yeah, why not just go up to an alien and completely unknown plant and take a giant whiff I'm not a zeno biologist but I have a feeling that's strawberry floating moronic and if you do so and slowly die I'm going to make sure I spend you final hours telling you what a plank you are in no uncertain terms.
Also in the Alien universe the robot always goes bonkers so how about we just leave them at home and make them into high class butlers rather than have then yet again betray us in space and kill us all.

Lastly how many times do we have to have the whole discovery phase does nobody in the military or the companies that run these ships think it may be a good idea to inform the rest of humanity that yet again an entire facility/ship has needed to be nuked which killed almost everyone and that this is what they look like and that sticking your face into a giant pot like thing on the floor results in face humpage? #

The more I think about it the less it seems to make sense.
jiggles wrote:Nobody with a VR headset is going to be using it regularly this time next year, let alone in 4 years time.


Posted 16th March 2016. Let's see.
User avatar
Hime
Member
Joined in 2008

PostRe: Last film you watched and your rating: The Directors Cut
by Hime » Sun May 14, 2017 6:38 pm

Denster wrote:There's not a chance it's worse than AVsP

I haven't seen it since it was in cinema's but I remember quite enjoying AvP2 :shifty:
Image
User avatar
Brerlappin
Member
Joined in 2008

PostRe: Last film you watched and your rating: The Directors Cut
by Brerlappin » Sun May 14, 2017 8:29 pm

Hime wrote:
Denster wrote:There's not a chance it's worse than AVsP

I haven't seen it since it was in cinema's but I remember quite enjoying AvP2 :shifty:


All I remember of AvP2 was it was so dark you couldn't see a strawberry floating thing in it.
BOR
Member
Joined in 2008

PostRe: Last film you watched and your rating: The Directors Cut
by BOR » Sun May 14, 2017 8:47 pm

Brerlappin wrote:
Hime wrote:
Denster wrote:There's not a chance it's worse than AVsP

I haven't seen it since it was in cinema's but I remember quite enjoying AvP2 :shifty:


All I remember of AvP2 was it was so dark you couldn't see a strawberry floating thing in it.

Yep that's correct. I couldn't even tell who is who. It was difficult to see which was Predalien. :dread:
"The job is done, and the bitch is dead."
User avatar
Denster
Member
Member
Joined in 2008

PostRe: Last film you watched and your rating: The Directors Cut
by Denster » Sun May 14, 2017 8:54 pm

2 or 3/10 is a joke score. It was a good 7/10. I really enjoyed it. It answered some questions for Prometheus, had done good scares and gore and looked stunning.

The CGI birthing of the
Normal morphs was a bit rubbish (would have liked to see some great physical effects there) but the neomorphs were good.
Love list


Super Dragon 64
User avatar
Hime
Member
Joined in 2008

PostRe: Last film you watched and your rating: The Directors Cut
by Hime » Sun May 14, 2017 9:37 pm

Brerlappin wrote:
Hime wrote:
Denster wrote:There's not a chance it's worse than AVsP

I haven't seen it since it was in cinema's but I remember quite enjoying AvP2 :shifty:


All I remember of AvP2 was it was so dark you couldn't see a strawberry floating thing in it.

All I remember is that it had someone from 24. I want to say Michelle?
Image
JediDragon05
Member
Joined in 2010
Location: The Grcade asylum

PostRe: Last film you watched and your rating: The Directors Cut
by JediDragon05 » Sun May 14, 2017 9:57 pm

Guardians Of The Galaxy

I'm Mary Poppins y'all /5

That was great fun :lol: :toot:

Return to “Stuff”

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: Alexa [Bot], Benzin, Blue Eyes, Cuttooth, Jam-Master Jay, Jamo3103, Jenuall, Monkey Man, OrangeRakoon, Rightey, SerialCeler, Squinty, Tineash and 39 guests