You: The world has gone 'upgrade' crazy
Stranger: I know
Stranger: It sucks
You: It really does
You: Can't get anything with what it's supposed to without paying through the nose for it
Stranger: It's true
Stranger: unfortunately
Stranger: This world is.. Useless. Wanna move to mars with me=?
You: Yeah, sure.
Stranger: Cool
Stranger: You got a spacerocket?
You: So long as you don't charge me extra for headphones on the trip over
You: Not to hand, no
Stranger: Wanna steal one?
You: We should ask NASA
Stranger: Ask?
Stranger: They'll never give
Stranger: Let's steal it
You: Stealing's just as good
Stranger: Cool
Stranger: Do you know where they have one?
You: America?
Stranger: Most likely
Stranger: Will they execute us if they find us?
Stranger: Else I bet Russia got one.
You: They'll have to catch us first
Stranger: Oh.
Stranger: True.
You: and those things go fast, so we should be safe
Stranger: Do you know how to steer one?
You: I've played Microsoft Flight Simulator, how hard can it be?
Stranger: Oh
Stranger: Good
Stranger: I've only played GTA, so I'll get the guns
You: Sweet
Stranger: Just to go to a basement and pay up some cash
Stranger: So, can you fire one?
You: I'll give it a shot
You: *snigger*
Stranger: Holy ****, Groz?
You: What is this Groz you speak of?
You: Some rocket guidance system?
Stranger: It's a friend, he always says "snigger".
You: Fair enough. It is not I.
Stranger: Ah
Stranger: Shame
Stranger: So, do we get code names?
Stranger: In case they'll be listening on our walkie talkies once we steal the rocket?
You: Yeah, we better had.
You: I call Mr. Black
Stranger: I'll be Mr. White.
You: Ok, so now what do we do?
Stranger: Uhm..
Stranger: We need to meet up.
Stranger: I'll get the guns
Stranger: And meet you in NY?
You: To NY it is.
Stranger: Ace
You: Also, once we get to the moon, we'll want to repopulate, so I'll grab some women folk along the way.
You: *Mars
Stranger: Oh
Stranger: Good
Stranger: Hm
Stranger: You know.. I think I have an idea.
You: Do share
Stranger: What if we search for jobs there
Stranger: Then we stuff down a couple o'ladies down the rocket before we take off.
Stranger: They'll be there for a few days, we give them some water and bread, they'll survive.
Stranger: Then we can just say we take guard during the night, then we steal it..
Stranger: Then we take off.
You: It's bulletproof
You: Not the rocket, the plan.
Stranger: Oh
Stranger: What if they start shooting at us?
You: They wouldn't shoot a multi-million dollar space craft
You: Would they?
Stranger: Ah, of course not.
Stranger: It'd be like our hostage and meat shield.
Stranger: But.. Plate.. Shield..
You: Plate, you're right, we'll need food.
You: How much will we need, any idea how long the trip to Mars is?
Stranger: I don't know, two hours?
Stranger: As you said, those things go really quick.
You: Fair enough, I'll just pack some crisps and cans of coke to be safe.
Stranger: Alright, sounds fair.
Stranger: Do we have any space suits?
You: Do they come with the rocket?
Stranger: Hm..
Stranger: They should.
Stranger: I mean, who would build a car without safety belts?
Stranger: It's the same thing.
You: Makes sense.
You: If not, I have a fish bowl I can turn upside down.
Stranger: Do we need clothes or can I finally run around naked without anyone whining on Mars?
You: I don't think anyone'll mind, and it'd be difficult to repopulate with your clothes on
Stranger: Oh
Stranger: Of course.
Stranger: So... Women you said..
Stranger: Do you know... How to repopulate?
You: You know, I've never really thought about that bit before
You: I swear I heard what to do somewhere
Stranger: I have no idea, we should figure that out..
You: I think you're supposed to put your penis inside them, then you pee
You: and 9 months later, a baby pops out
Stranger: Oh
Stranger: Well
Stranger: Sounds quite simple
You: How hard could it be?
Stranger: Yeah
Stranger: Just need to go bathroom and instead, you go to the girl.
You: Sounds like a real time saver
Stranger: Yeah.
Stranger: I mean..
Stranger: You can bring the girl around and pee in her instead of going to the bathroom.
Stranger: Also, I'm not sure we'll have alot of bathrooms on Mars..
You: Probably not, but those craters have to be for something
Stranger: Aaah. Of course.
Stranger: You're quite the survivor, aren't you?
You: I did go camping for the weekend once
Stranger: Really?
Stranger: Okay.
Stranger: So, you'll be the survivor..
Stranger: I'll be the builder.
Stranger: I made a butter knife once, knew the knowledge would come handy someday.
You: Thank god we'll be able to spread butter once we get there
Stranger: Yeah.
Stranger: Also
Stranger: I know how we should raise in technology and such.
Stranger: We'll just come up with a religion like the Romans did. You see how fast this world went to become super-techno.
Stranger: If we do the same, I'm sure we'll end up as good. Then we can start a nuclear war against Earth.
You: Yeah, you can make people do anything for religion.
You: Then we'll show this pesky Earth
Stranger: I wanna be pope.
You: Can I be co-Pope?
Stranger: of course
Stranger: You can be president aswell
You: Sweet.
Stranger: since your codename is Mr. Black, I suppose you'll be the first black president on Mars too.
You: I'm Making history already!
Stranger: Yeah!
Stranger: Damn, we've got a good plan.
Stranger: But perhaps.. Instead of destroying Earth..
Stranger: Shouldn't we conquer it?
Stranger: Romans did that too
Stranger: Then they became super advanced.
You: Then enslave those who refuse to bow to our will
You: make them work for us
Stranger: Yes!
Stranger: We should live in harems of gold for our brilliant plan
You: We'll live like kings
You: Pope and President kings
You: And to think, until this day, I was just going to live the normal, boring life of a Formula 1 driver
Stranger: Yeah..
Stranger: I guess I'll gotta go outside and challange that burning thing called sun again.
Stranger: I'll miss my basement.
You: I don't think they have many basements on Mars, but you could probably build one
Stranger: Oh
Stranger: Of course!
Stranger: Genious!
Stranger: Hm..
Stranger: I want to build a basement on earth.
Stranger: It's quite cold down here sometimes.
Stranger: So, where are you right now?
You: In my F1 car.
Stranger: Ah
Stranger: Of course.
You: This is what I do in the races
You: What are you doing?
Stranger: Sitting in my basement with a pizza.
Stranger: Hawaii... mmm.
You: Oh man, Pineapple on a pizza?
You: I can't believe you've done this
You have disconnected.