Squinty wrote:For strawberry float sake.
I can just imagine over the Christmas break that Davis was lounging around doing nothing (pretty much the same as his working day) and suddenly a thought popped into his head. “What the strawberry float was that!” he cried, before realising that he was starting to think again, “Oh gooseberry fool, Britain might need to have some agreements with the EU!”. The realisation hit him like a bullet, suddenly he could see that the demands of Britain to be treated as a special case were happening, “strawberry float, if we are treated differently like we asked, it might mean that we are worse off!”.
Davis was on the case though, “First things first, we better stop them singling us out in the way we asked for!” and he fired off a letter to the Prime Minister to say we should sue them for planning for no deal, “After all Prime Minister, all we have done is spent the best part of two years telling them that we were happy to have no deal, those bastards are only taking us seriously! And even worse they are working and planning things!”.
Happy with his minimal effort at averting disaster, another thought popped into his head. “Shitting hell!” Davis screamed “Does this mean the EU might leave us out of any banking or financial matters once we walk away? Those utter bastards might cause a worldwide financial crash like in 2008, that we blamed on Gordon Brown and Labour! Damn it all, it is almost like the world of international trade, cooperation and finance is all intrinsically linked!”.
Davis was happy with his thoughts, he had actually made some effort and quickly consoled himself with the thought of a beautiful blue passport. “No more burgundy Prime Minister, no more burgundy at all!”.