The GRCade Confessional 2016 [CONFESS! CONFESS!! CONFESS!!!]

strawberry floating hell

It's what grandma would've wanted.

The GRCade Confessor wrote:Good people of GRCade, I present to you the first anonymous confession of 2016. I wonder what the confessor wishes to get off their ch-

I hacked mockmasters account and was permabanned but re-registered to continue posting under a new name

That was amazing. That moment in Breaking Bad, I mean, not the Mocky-hacky.

The GRCade Confessor wrote:

10 years ago I stayed over at a mate's house to see in the new year. We drank, played games, watched TV with his family, the usual stuff. When it came to sleeping, I was staying on the floor in the back room, as space was at a premium. He told me that his grandmother had recently died in the chair in that room. That kind of freaked me out, but meh, I was tipsy and tired.

As I got to settling down, the urge to have a wank was calling out to me, as it does to most horny teenagers. There was a slight problem, though - I had nowhere TO wank. I didn't want to leave the room, as doing so might wake someone. So I did the only thing I could do in the situation, which was use one of my socks.

I sat in the chair and wanked away. It didn't take long. Whilst I was slumped in the chair, I realised something - I was sat in the strawberry floating dead grandmother chair. I jumped up in a mix of guilt, disgust and terror and laid back on the duvet.

When I woke up in the morning, I was greeted by a slight issue. I now only had one clean sock. strawberry float sake. Not to arouse suspicion, I put the wank sock on my foot, acted like nothing happened and went home.

Sorry about your grandmother and the wank smell, Jamie.

Tragic?

i used the last of the milk at work and pretended it wasn't me and people got mad

When did the Mocky hack actually happen?

Saigon Slick wrote:When did the Mocky hack actually happen?

It's ongoing

23 years old. Still a virgin.

I fear you believe this to be a much bigger deal than it actually is, my anonymous friend.

As for the rest of GRCade...

I FIND YOU LACK OF CONFESSIONS DISTURBING. I TRUST THE MAILBOX WILL BE OVERFLOWING WHEN I NEXT CHECK IT.

Pffft, complain when you hit 34.

I'm 25 and still a virgin, why should you care?

Well there are lots of reasons why you might, that's not to say you should or feel like it's something you need to confess, because I don't think it's as strange as tv / film often leads people to think.

The GRCade Confessor wrote:

10 years ago I stayed over at a mate's house to see in the new year. We drank, played games, watched TV with his family, the usual stuff. When it came to sleeping, I was staying on the floor in the back room, as space was at a premium. He told me that his grandmother had recently died in the chair in that room. That kind of freaked me out, but meh, I was tipsy and tired.

As I got to settling down, the urge to have a wank was calling out to me, as it does to most horny teenagers. There was a slight problem, though - I had nowhere TO wank. I didn't want to leave the room, as doing so might wake someone. So I did the only thing I could do in the situation, which was use one of my socks.

I sat in the chair and wanked away. It didn't take long. Whilst I was slumped in the chair, I realised something - I was sat in the strawberry floating dead grandmother chair. I jumped up in a mix of guilt, disgust and terror and laid back on the duvet.

When I woke up in the morning, I was greeted by a slight issue. I now only had one clean sock. strawberry float sake. Not to arouse suspicion, I put the wank sock on my foot, acted like nothing happened and went home.

Sorry about your grandmother and the wank smell, Jamie.

I'm going to say Anung.

Banjo wrote:

The GRCade Confessor wrote:

10 years ago I stayed over at a mate's house to see in the new year. We drank, played games, watched TV with his family, the usual stuff. When it came to sleeping, I was staying on the floor in the back room, as space was at a premium. He told me that his grandmother had recently died in the chair in that room. That kind of freaked me out, but meh, I was tipsy and tired.

As I got to settling down, the urge to have a wank was calling out to me, as it does to most horny teenagers. There was a slight problem, though - I had nowhere TO wank. I didn't want to leave the room, as doing so might wake someone. So I did the only thing I could do in the situation, which was use one of my socks.

I sat in the chair and wanked away. It didn't take long. Whilst I was slumped in the chair, I realised something - I was sat in the strawberry floating dead grandmother chair. I jumped up in a mix of guilt, disgust and terror and laid back on the duvet.

When I woke up in the morning, I was greeted by a slight issue. I now only had one clean sock. strawberry float sake. Not to arouse suspicion, I put the wank sock on my foot, acted like nothing happened and went home.

Sorry about your grandmother and the wank smell, Jamie.

I'm going to say Anung.

Nah.

This guy felt disgust.

10 years ago I stayed over at a mate's house to see in the new year. We drank, played games, watched TV with his family, the usual stuff. When it came to sleeping, I was staying on the floor in the back room, as space was at a premium. He told me that his grandmother had recently died in the chair in that room. That kind of freaked me out, but meh, I was tipsy and tired.

As I got to settling down, the urge to have a wank was calling out to me, as it does to most horny teenagers. There was a slight problem, though - I had nowhere TO wank. I didn't want to leave the room, as doing so might wake someone. So I did the only thing I could do in the situation, which was use one of my socks.

I sat in the chair and wanked away. It didn't take long. Whilst I was slumped in the chair, I realised something - I was sat in the strawberry floating dead grandmother chair. I jumped up in a mix of guilt, disgust and terror and laid back on the duvet.

When I woke up in the morning, I was greeted by a slight issue. I now only had one clean sock. strawberry float sake. Not to arouse suspicion, I put the wank sock on my foot, acted like nothing happened and went home.

Sorry about your grandmother and the wank smell, Jamie.

It was a spooky ghost!

I fear that any confession I wouldn't put up in my own name would still quite obviously be by me due to the necessary inclusion of stacks of drugs.

Not too awful but was funny as fyck at the time, I knew a lad in the past who went out on a mephedrone and GBL binge one night. He was big on pulling random lasses and, while calling him a homophobe would be a stretch, I know he wasn't entirely comfortable talking gooseberry fool about men strawberry floating or whatever.

Anyway, after grams of meph and ml's of GBL, he ended up partying all night and forgetting the vast majority of it. Woke up in some random flat, headed home and only days later when looking through his phone he found pictures of himself, thumb ups with a straw between his fingers snorting lines off someone's erect penis.

He reckons he ran out of meph and was only allowed more if he did it off the random guy's dick.

Rocsteady wrote:I fear that any confession I wouldn't put up in my own name would still quite obviously be by me due to the necessary inclusion of stacks of drugs.

A nice try at diverting suspicion there but it hasn't worked, you dead granny chair wanker.

Moggy wrote:

Rocsteady wrote:I fear that any confession I wouldn't put up in my own name would still quite obviously be by me due to the necessary inclusion of stacks of drugs.

A nice try at diverting suspicion there but it hasn't worked, you dead granny chair wanker.

Don't forget cock snorter

When I was 8 years old I stole a milkfloat while the milkman was making his rounds and hid it round the corner from him.

'Making his rounds'

Was this the milkman?