The moan about your neighbours thread - Stool Bloke returns...

[Wrathy]

My left side neighbour is serial killer quiet. She hasn't said hello to me yet. I've lived here a year.

It’s Wrathy. Keep stealing her parking, it’s proper winding her up. That’ll teach her for being ignorant.

[jawafour]

Been woken up by my neighbours arguing. Seriously, it's 01:40 and they're shouting at each other and banging doors. Just gotta wonder how long it's gonna go on for... they seem to have absolutely no concept of "hey, we're disturbing others".

[Rapidly-Greying]

Been woken up by my neighbours arguing. Seriously, it's 01:40 and they're shouting at each other and banging doors. Just gotta wonder how long it's gonna go on for... they seem to have absolutely no concept of "hey, we're disturbing others".

We are the only people on the planet that matter so we'll do whatever the strawberry float we want.

banana splits.

[7256930752]

Moved into our dream house at the end of last year, detached, the people haven't moved in one side, the other is the show house. Finally got a great sound system now that I can play games and watch films without worrying about neighbours . That was until it turns out it scares the gooseberry fool out of the dog so I'm back to wearing headphones.

Also, as those of you who live on an estate with gooseberry fool parking will appreciate the idea of a massive driveway is heavinly. That is until every banana split in the terraced houses opposite decides to park opposite the driveway making it a pain in the arse getting in and out. I actually got stuck in the snow as my car couldn't get up the kerb and I couldn't go forward to build up some momentum

[Tsunade]

The guy downstairs is an old guy up in his 80s. He is a pain.

That sounds like a banana split who deserves a glitter bomb.
PM me his address and it will be done!

I would but he'd probably give everyone a lecture about kids again, and I could do without another lecture from the lech.

[Wrathy]

upstairs seem to be having a party with a million people in attendance so I had to sleep with earplugs in last night when they fell in the door at 3am and re-started their shenanigans and they're being loud as strawberry float today again too

sigh

prison is too kind a destination for them

[Buffalo]

They were gonna ask you if you wanted to go but you blanked them in the corridor as per. So it’s all your own fault, really.

[KK]

Never really had any issues with any of my neighbours. In fact when my Dad used to play AC/DC at 10pm, WE were probably the nuisance neighbours.

I was briefly awoken by my current student neighbours playing Jimi Hendrix ('Hang on, is that Hollywood Hogan's theme music...') at 2am on Friday but that dissipated after about 10 minutes.

[KjGarly]

One neighbour is never home, she works then spends the rest of her time at her sick mothers so never hear a peep and the other is an old lady who moved in less than a year ago and turned out to be one of my customers. She's alright like but when I had a dog it used to jump up on the back of the chair and poke its head through the window blinds and go wild which drove me nuts as I hate dogs that bark like banana splits all the time so I was forever telling the little gooseberry fool to strawberry float off to his cage. After getting shut of it, not only because it was an annoying banana split but because it bit through my daughters foot and I had the decision of the dogs trust or hold his head under the water during bath-time, she told me she used to stand outside winding the dog up to make it go crazy. She ain't alright anymore...

Same one got a new 3 piece and 2 piece sofa and dumped her old ones in the entree/alley then came in my shop complaining of others in the street dumping shite in the entree/alley

The strawberry floating cheek of it

[karl_fletcher]

I'm in a detached house so don't really have any issues with the neighbour's in terms of noise, but the family next door are strawberry floating weird. When we first moved in, the dad (a short Iranian man wearing an Indiana Jones hat) rode his bike into my back garden and gave us a bag of weed from the multiple plants he has in his garden. An unusual welcoming gift but appreciated none the less. His son is a teenager and for around a year and a half he would be at home all day every day, his bedroom window propped open by an old brandy bottle, playing videogames only stopping to take a puff on his bong. He recently appears to have moved out. The daughter is the weirdest one, she is always pacing up and down the street on her phone, sometimes for hours at a time. Last summer, I was lying out the back and noticed her playing keepy ups, she would manage one or two then do a muffled scream of rage and kick the ball against the fence.

They have a small dog that fairly frequently gooseberry fools in my front and back garden. Their cat used to love coming in to attack my cats but was recently killed by a coyote. When they have big rubbish to throw out they put it out on the street even if it's not going to be picked up for two weeks. So all in all they're weird and a bit gross, but they don't affect me too badly.

[LewisD]

The guy downstairs is an old guy up in his 80s. He is a pain.

That sounds like a banana split who deserves a glitter bomb.
PM me his address and it will be done!

I would but he'd probably give everyone a lecture about kids again, and I could do without another lecture from the lech.

He'll never know.
It's completely anonymous

https://www.glitterretribution.co.uk/sp ... tter-canon

Give me the deets and I'll pay for it

[Moggy]

Sounds like my neighbour has cheated on his girlfriend. I have been hearing her shouting at him for over an hour now, but all I could make out was “Why her? You never did anything with the Scottish girl so why this one”.

Was tempted to shout back “I bet he did the Scottish girl as well!” but didn’t think they’d appreciate it.

[Alvin Flummux]

Slip a paper under their door saying "The Scottish girl got it gooood."

[Moggy]

Slip a paper under their door saying "The Scottish girl got it gooood."

[OLIN]

We get on well with our neighbours both sides. If we ever have a very occasional garden party we always make a point of inviting them.

[Rapidly-Greying]

Sounds like my neighbour has cheated on his girlfriend. I have been hearing her shouting at him for over an hour now, but all I could make out was “Why her? You never did anything with the Scottish girl so why this one”.

Was tempted to shout back “I bet he did the Scottish girl as well!” but didn’t think they’d appreciate it.

He definitely pumped the Scottish lass.

[Ironhide]

All my neighbours are elderly and fairly tolerable, there's a guy down the road who is seemingly permanently outside chatting to anyone unfortunate enough to walk past - usually about the most boring, mundane subject he can think of, but especially the 'unsightly' wind turbines which can be seen from the bottom of his drive.

They're several miles away yet he doesn't stop moaning about them.

[Victor Mildew]

.

[SandyCoin]

In Germany there seems to be this "rule" about noise on Sundays. Apparently you can't do stuff like vacuuming or loud cleaning or whatever. Sadly our neighbour upstairs does this nearly every Sunday. Pretty annoying but luckily that's the worst we get.

Not so much a neighbour, but recently there has been building work going on next door and the banana splits start throwing pipes and gooseberry fool around at around 7.30am. Utter banana splits.

When I was little we had horrible neighbours at my parents house. If one of our footballs went over the fence they would throw over the leather. They actually skinned the balls The more I think about it though, I'm sure it was us who were the loud and awful ones.

[Preezy]

Our neighbours have 2 young boys (maybe 4 and 6) so it's inevitable that you'll sometimes hear them running about making noise, that's fine. Our daughter makes a racket sometimes as well so it's not something that annoys. BUT they slam their front door several times a day, as if the handle isn't there at all. Drives me up the strawberry floating wall