Our best bits.
- Joined in 2008
- Location: Botswana
WWE RAW Results 17th March 2014 wrote:
Location: AT&T Center; San Antonio, Texas
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry "The King" Lawler and John "Bradshaw" Layfield
RAW opened with Triple H standing in the ring. He started by saying come WrestleMania he is going to crush everyone's dreams by defeating Daniel Bryan. However he has a few things he wants to say to Bryan first, and he will do so later tonight man-to-man, as Triple H bent down mocking Bryan's size. Batista's music then interrupted and he made his way down to the ring. He told Hunter he had bigger problems to deal with than Daniel Bryan. Batista asked what Triple H was doing giving a "billy-goat faced troll" a place in his Championship match at WrestleMania. Batista continued that he came back to be WWE World Champion, which he earned the opportunity to at the Royal Rumble; he didn't come back to compete in a Triple Threat Match where he doesn’t even need to be pinned to lose. HHH replied by asking what Batista was thinking believing Daniel Bryan was going to even get to the Triple Threat match. This brought out WWE Champion Randy Orton. Orton was in agreement with Batista. Triple H asked what the matter with both of them was; had Bryan got into their heads that much? Batista fired back not nearly as much as Bryan had apparently got into Triple H's. Randy interjected saying he wants Daniel Bryan tonight in a No Disqualification match so he can prove to Triple that he is able to do what Batista couldn’t last week. Triple H told Randy he has his match. Randy said that the Yes Movement isn’t why the people are cheering Daniel Bryan, it's because nobody believes in Batista; when Batista left, nobody cared. And When he came back, people cared even less. Orton said that if Batista had lived up to his hype in the first place this current situation wouldn't exist. Batista responded by saying the people care about Daniel because Randy completely sucks as WWE Champion, and is simply a paper champion who will lose to him at WrestleMania and he knows it. Randy and Batista got into a face-to-face, which resulted in Triple H getting shoved away by both men. Having had enough, Triple H left the ring, causing Batista to ask where the hell he thought he was going as he needs to fix this. Hunter then lost it, stating he was sick of it all; sick of Daniel Bryan and the fans, sick of Hollywood movie stars coming back thinking they can tell him what is right for business, and sick of technically gifted athletes who are so screwed up in the head that they cannot win a match without him holding their hand. Triple H said that maybe "the old man" was right all along, with the only person you are able to trust in this world being yourself. Triple H announced there was going to be a Triple Threat Match at WrestleMania, however Daniel Bryan will not be in it. Hunter declared that when he beats Daniel Bryan, the Triple Threat Match will be Batista vs. Randy Orton vs...Triple H. Hunter left up the ramp, leaving Batista to eat an RKO at the hands of Randy Orton.
The announced John Cena would respond to the Wyatt Family later tonight.
Tag Champions The Uso's were shown backstage heading towards the ring.
Back from commercial, Renee Young caught up with Batista backstage who was in the process of leaving the arena. He said he should never have come back, before storming off.
Match 1: In a thoroughly entertaining outing, The Real Americans (w/Zeb Colter) defeated Tag Team Champions The Usos in a non-title match when Cesaro nailed The Neutraliser for the pin.
We got a trailer for WWE Slam City - airing directly following RAW on Sky Sports!
They re-aired the conclusion to Kane vs. Big Show from SmackDown, in which The Shield refused to help Kane, leading to Big Show picking up the victory. After the match, Kane was Speared by Roman Reigns.
Backstage, Kane confronted The Shield. He said on SmackDown things got out of hand and they all made some regrettable decisions. Dean fired back "Yeah, for you". Kane said this was no time for pettiness, as The Authority has given them a mission and they need to be united. He said if he can't count on them, then The Authority can't count on them either, and then they cease being an asset. Kane said they will do the right thing when asked or find out how replaceable they really are.
Hornswoggle was handing out St. Patrick's Day gifts to the crowd when #BadNewsBarret interrupted on his podium. Barrett said that the legend goes St. Patrick chased the snakes out of Ireland. The bad news however was that most of the crowd will spend the holiday getting inebriated and vomiting all over themselves, waking up in the morning remembering that you did something regrettable which they'll then regret the rest of their lives.
Christian was on commentary. He said he'll be in the Andre WrestleMania Battle Royal, along with Titus O'Neil.
Match 2: Sheamus pinned Titus O'Neil (who came out wearing a stupid green hat and moustache) with a Brogue Kick.
After the match, Renee Young interviewed Sheamus in the ring. He wished everyone a happy St. Paddy's Day, before announcing he was entering himself into the Andre The Giant Battle Royal. As Sheamus was leaving, Christian attacked Sheamus on the apron, sending him to the floor. He then delivered the Kill Switch on the outside.
Arnold Schwarzenegger was announced as being on RAW next week.
At the top of the hour John Cena made his way out. Cena said he has been in the WWE for 12 years, having more than 3,500 matches. He said he has spent a lot of time with the crowd and in turn we have spent a lot of time with him. We are like a married couple (about time we divorced then, no?). Cena said some times we get along, but some times we do not, but nonetheless he always gives his best. Cena said that he is afraid of Bray; afraid of what he stands for, and afraid that people are actually listening to what he says. Cena said all Bray Wyatt wants to do is destroy his legacy. The Wyatt's interrupted on the TitanTron. Crowd chanted for "Cena". No, they really did. Bray was wearing a John Cena T-Shirt. Bray said he could be just like Cena, signing autographs, kissing babies, making sure everyone buys his merchandise, and going back home to his 'plastic girlfriend in his castle' (which drew a few "Oh!"s from the crowd) and tell jokes. But that isn't him. Bray ended by saying he doesn't care if he dies at WrestleMania, he wants the world to see John Cena like he does.
Match 3: Daniel Bryan defeated WWE Champion Randy Orton in a non-title No Disqualification match after Batista ran in and hit Orton with a Spear. After Daniel Bryan dispatched Batista with a dropkick, Bryan made the cover for the win. After the match Batista recovered and planted Randy Orton with a Batista Bomb.
Paul Heyman came out onto the stage for a promo. Heyman said he wanted to illustrate the point that in past matches, Undertaker has barely survived at WrestleMania. In comparison Brock Lesnar has conquered and dominated these individuals. Heyman had the truck play a video package on Undertaker's streak, and ultimately how easily Brock Lesnar defeated them, in turn 'proving' Lesnar will end The Streak. This sounded like it was narrated by something out of Discworld. Heyman vowed at WrestleMania Undertaker will be the one resting in piece.
In the RAW office Stephanie McMahon was with Triple H, where she wanted to get something straight, questioning whether Triple H was sure that all he wanted to do was talk with Bryan. Stephanie told Hunter that maybe he just can't relate to what happened last week. She said that Bryan dissected the McMahon family legacy. She continued, asking what was going to happen when HHH becomes champion; what happens when he has to go on the road, and what happens to Triple H the businessman. Triple H said she should just leave him to deal with it. Stephanie said he'd better, before storming of, the door heard slamming in the background.
Match 4: Goldust (w/Cody Rhodes) pinned Fandango (w/Summer Rae). Goldust looked legitimately peeved about something or other following the match, because there's nothing like winning a match & being angry about it!
Kane was shown walking backstage heading towards the ring.
Corporate Kane made his way out. Kane said as Director of Operations it was his job to execute The Authority's vision. The ring is a place for action, but some action is undesired - such as the occupy RAW movement last week, which breached numerous safety edicts which are in place for the protection of the audience. Kane said after conducting a thorough investigation into the debacle he had come to the conclusion Bryan could not have pulled it off alone. Instead a native of Memphis had helped him. Kane then demanded Jerry Lawler enter the ring. Crowd broke out into a "Jerry" chant. Kane said he was afraid he was going to pull something like this, as Lawler remained at the table. The Shield came out through the crowd and went over to the announce table.
Dean Ambrose demanded Jerry get up and enter the ring. Kane said they've both known each other for a long time (well, he was Lawler's dentist...). Kane asked if Lawler had anything to say for himself. Rollins stepped in and said he sees the look in Lawler's eyes, but he has a good feeling Bryan won't be coming down to save him because The Shield always does what's best for business. The Shield then turned their attention to Kane, allowing Lawler to leave the ring. With the crowd chanting"Yes!" The Shield then put the beating to Kane, effectively turning face. Reigns nailed Kane with a Spear, and then all three planted him with a Triple Power Bomb. The Shield stood tall sending RAW to commercial.
The Bellas' came out on commentary & exuded as much personality as you'd expect.
Match 5: The Funkadactyls (a returning Naomi sporting an eye patch) defeated AJ Lee and Tamina when Naomi pinned AJ Lee with a Split-Legged Moonsault. After the match AJ and Tamina got into an argument which resulted in Tamina shoving AJ onto her backside.
In a video package Mr. T was revealed as being the Celebrity inductee into the 2014 WWE Hall of Fame. This appeared to receive barely any reaction from the Live crowd.
They re-aired Hogan's announcement from last week.
Big Show cut an inset-promo vowing victory in the Andre The Giant Battle Royal.
Match 6: In an average 8 man tag that didn't pick up until the final minute, Big E, Dolph Ziggler, Mark Henry and Big Show (the only one to actually receive an entrance) defeated Alberto Del Rio, Ryback, Curtis Axel and Damien Sandow after Big Show got Sandow up for the Chokeslam.
Renee Young caught up with Batista backstage once more. Batista said he's never quit anything in his life, and no matter who it is at WrestleMania, he is leaving as Champion.
They announced The Undertaker will be Live on Main Event tomorrow night. John Cena vs. Luke Harper was also revealed for SmackDown.
We got an interested video package on Bray Wyatt vs. John Cena, featuring Eminem's "Legacy", the 2nd theme to WrestleMania XXX.
Main Event: Bray Wyatt (w/Luke Harper and Erik Rowan) pinned Kofi Kingston off Sister Abigail.
They aired a trailer for upcoming WWE Production Oculus. Sky however decided we didn't need to see yet another shitty WWE film and immediately cut to commercial break.
COO Triple H walked out 1 minute prior to the top of the hour. Hunter requested Daniel Bryan come down to the ring.
Triple H said he wasn't sure Stephanie would talk to him after tonight but he wants to talk to Daniel like a man as a lot of things have happened that have lead to this moment. HHH explained that everything he has done to Daniel Bryan he has done because it was "best for business" with none of it being personal. However last week Daniel crossed a line that he won’t be able to come back from. While it doesn't matter how they got to this point, it feels like it was supposed to happen this way. Triple H claimed he has no choice but to put an end to this 'Yes Movement', and if that means putting an end to Daniel Bryan then so be it. He then said that he wants there to be no hard feelings between the two of them and may the best man win. Hunter offered his hand for Daniel to shake but unsurprisingly Bryan refused. Hunter said the fans chant Bryan's name because they respect him; he has walked through a mountain of crap when anyone else would have folded therefore he has earned his respect. As Hunter prepared to leave the ring, Stephanie stormed down to the ring shouting "Respect?". Stephanie said that what Daniel Bryan did last week was not only disrespectful but illegal, so she was going to have him arrested right here tonight. As police marched their way down to the ring, Triple H and Stephanie argued in the aisle-way. The officers took down Bryan and handcuffed him. Stephanie and Triple H then stopped arguing, with a small grin appearing on both their faces. Hunter got in the ring and demanded the officers back off... nonchalantly stating that they're not even real police officers anyway. With Daniel Bryan now handcuffed, Triple H proceeded to spend the next 10 minutes beating him up in and around ringside. After smashing a steel chair over Bryan's head against the ring post, Triple H planted a completely lifeless Bryan with a Pedigree. Stephanie and Hunter kissed, Triple H helping Stephanie remove a pair of keys attached to a necklace, which she then proceeded to wave in Bryan's face. King of Kings finally ringed out to take RAW off the air! Incredibly, nobody came out to help Bryan...Cena presumably preoccupied with both Bellas' or something.
- Joined in 2008
- Location: Botswana
WWE RAW Results March 24 2014 wrote:
Location: Barclays Center; Brooklyn, New York
Commentators: Michael Cole, John "Cranky" Layfield and Jerry "The King" Lawler
Monday Night RAW kicked off with me opening a bag of Galaxy Minstrels. Stephanie McMahon made her way out and welcomed everyone to the show. She said Daniel Bryan would not be in attendance. Stephanie said that she has been reading on social media that what happened to Daniel Bryan last week at the conclusion of RAW was wrong and uncomfortable to watch; she agrees, but they needed to send a message to the Superstars and Divas in the locker room that insubordination is not be tolerated, and that they will not let some fad like the "YES! Movement" lead everyone down a path to self-destruction. The crowd chanted for "CM Punk" but Stephanie completely ignored them and carried on speaking. She said Daniel Bryan was reminded of who owns the WWE and who her husband is: the greatest Superstar in history who will go on to become the WWE World Heavyweight champion at WrestleMania XXX. This brought out Randy Orton, who said he wasn't out there to disagree with a single word she had said, rather he is going to have to beat Triple H "if", which Stephanie immediately corrected as "when", he beats him at 'Mania. Crowd chanted for "Daniel Bryan" which Stephanie jumped on, saying Bryan wasn't even going to be on RAW tonight. He told her to make sure Hunter leaves WrestleMania a winner by just having him face Bryan only. Crowd chanted "boring". Bootista interrupted. Batista said that all of this is really driving him crazy, as Orton is squabbling and the crowd is too busy making up their stupid little chants, but everyone is missing the main point. Crowd went old-school and called him an "asshole". Batista's microphone kept cutting in and out, leading to Stephanie to interject and say she couldn't hear a word he was saying, pointing to another microphone placed in the ring off-camera. Batista said that while he respects Hunter, HHH has never beaten him. Batista then turned to Orton & told him that he makes him sick; one week he's sucking up to Triple H, the next Stephanie. Batista said Randy should get closer to her so he can drool all over her; then again Stephanie has been drooled on before. Batista then said come to think of it she has been drooled on a lot. Stephanie then slapped the sunglasses right off of Batista's head before storming off. Randy Orton, laughing his tits off, then took a Spear from Batista. Batista then posed with the belts.
Michael Cole revealed he would interview Triple H in the ring later.
Scooby Doo and The Mystery Machine are on the show.
In a rematch from SmackDown John Cena will take on Luke Harper again tonight.
And in addition to all that lot, Undertaker would come face to face with Brock Lesnar.
Intercontinental Champion Big E was at ringside to watch the following match.
Match 1: In a Number 1 Contenders match for the Intercontinental Championship, to be contested tomorrow night on Main Event Live, Christian defeated Alberto Del Rio, Dolph Ziggler and Sheamus in a Fatal Four Way when Christian hit the Kill Switch on Dolph Ziggler. After the match Big E went to shake Christian's hand but he blew him off.
The Wyatt's interrupted on the TitanTron and cut a promo on Cena.
We got a trailer for the new Scobby Doo animated movie. The Mystery Machine drove into the arena & out popped Sin Cara and a guy in a dog costume.
Match 2: Sin Cara (w/Scooby Doo...incredibly not the most surreal thing I've written this month) defeated Damien Sandow in 1:00.
They recapped the beat-down of The Shield from SmackDown last Friday.
Match 3: Los Matadores (w/El Torito) defeated Ryback and Curtis Axel in 1:00 when The Shield turned up through the crowd distracting Curtis Axel, who was quickly rolled up. After the match The Shield destroyed them both, Ryback eating a Spear at the hands of Roman Reigns. They then planted him with a Triple Power Bomb.
Two directors chairs and black carpet was set up in the ring, as Michael Cole introduced Triple H for their sit-down interview.
Michael said he felt it would be appropriate considering what happened last week that they should conduct the interview in the ring rather than on Wednesday at WWE.com. They re-aired Triple H wasting Bryan on RAW. Cole asked how he could justify the attack. Hunter said that question was confusing, as does he want him to respond as a COO or as a competitor. Crowd chanted "YES!". He said Bryan and the crowd were clear on what they were asking for, and last week they got it. HHH asked Cole if he had ever been shackled to do what someone else wanted. Cole responded by saying like Bryan was in handcuffs last week? Hunter said he was actually referring to when Bryan walked out with the WWE Universe and attempted to hijack RAW with their "YES movement" in an attempt to take over in a coo. HHH asked where Cole's mock horror was at that; 'No, that was okay, that was just a memorable RAW moment', whereas what he did was heinous. Cole responded by saying his actions were unbecoming of the WWE COO. Triple H said there was that confusion again, as Bryan had asked for The Game, not the COO. Hunter said Bryan and the crowd had forced the issue and made him become a competitor again. Bryan got what he deserved. Crowd chanted "Asshole" again. Triple H questioned what had happened to the world since he stopped competing. He used to do despicable things, and he would look out and see the same lust and desire. When he looks out there now however all he sees is apathy; soft and pathetic little people with no power and no desire. Instead when they don't get what they want they cry. Triple H sarcastically said how about we all send him a tweet. Hunter said the world has changed and he can't take it any more, so maybe it was up to him to start the "reality era", and maybe this was the beginning of it. Hunter threw the chair aside and said at WrestleMania he ends Bryan's supposed time at the top and ends the YES movement. He said the reality is when he's done with Bryan he's going to step into a Triple Threat match and nobody living off past glories or unfulfilled potential is going to stop him. He concluded by saying the reality is he's leaving as WWE Champion.
Match 4: Cody Rhodes (w/Goldust) pinned Fandango (w/Summer Rae) off the Disaster Kick when Fandango was distracted by Summer Rae falling over and hurting her ankle on the outside after she got into a mini dance-off with Goldust, who had just mocked her cheer-leading.
Michael Cole on commentary said Summer Rae was outed as a stooge on Total Divas' last night. JBL said they should check out the writer's room...
We got a trailer for Sabotage.
"When it comes crashing down and it hurts..." signalled the arrival of some old geezer from the late 80s who can't stop talking about his brother. The on-screen graphic said "Hulk Hogan". Must be the brother of Paul. Hogan said he doesn’t mean to come across all nostalgic and cry baby but Wrestlemania XXX is less than 2 weeks away, and they may be in a different borough tonight but in this very city, history was made when he teamed with the newest Hall of Famer, Mr. T at WrestleMania 1. Hogan said that he is excited for WrestleMania, the Andre The Giant Battle Royal, and also for the two people he is about to introduce: Joe Manganiello and Arnold Schwarzenegger. This brought out both men. Arnold said it was wonderful to be back again. A year ago he inducted his hero Bruno Sammartino into the Hall of Fame and now he cannot believe that he's standing in the ring with another hero of his, Hulk Hogan. Joe took the microphone and got booed. He said he was pumped to be at his first RAW and standing in the ring with two legends. Arnold said Andre The Giant was one of his favourite wrestlers of all time, and then asked Hogan if he had room for two more athletes in the Battle Royal. This brought out The Miz. He said that while he is a fan and is going to see Sabotage on Friday (not a forced sounding sentence at all...COUGH), and that Arnold is probably a fan of Miz’ work, particularly Marine 3, they are only actors. They only play tough guys, whereas he is an actual tough guy (said absolutely nobody ever) which just does acting on the side. Miz said people still talk about him main eventing Wrestlemania 27, defeating John Cena. Hogan smirked, as the sounds of laughter could be heard across the land. Miz said neither Joe or Arnold belong here...and that applies to Hogan too. Joe stepped in and demanded if he wants them to leave he's going to have to make them. Miz went for a cheap shot but was blocked by Joe, who punched Miz in the stomach, followed by a punch from Schwarzenegger. Hulk then threw Miz over the top rope.
They promoted Hercules staring The Rock.
Match 5: Big Show pinned Titus O'Neil with the KO Punch in 2:20. A short "CM Punk" chant broke out again.
Backstage Stephanie was straightening Triple H's tie when The Shield walked in. They wanted to know where they stood with the two of them. Hunter and Stephanie said The Shield's business with Kane and The Outlaws was nothing to do with them. Stephanie said that Kane is the Director of Operations, but why doesn't The Shield face The Real Americans later tonight and afterwards they can sit down and discuss things. The Shield said they will, before walking off, as Stephanie and Triple H looked at each other with an unsure look on their faces.
John Cena was in the bathroom splashing water on his face. When he looked up Erik Rowan's sheep mask was peeking out from behind a door frame. Cena quickly turned around but it was gone. Cena then looked back in the mirror as the commentators hyped the match, without mentioning the mysterious mask. I know what you're all thinking. Maybe Warrior was in the lav.
Match 6: John Cena, sporting yet another new T-Shirt, vs. Luke Harper (w/Bray Wyatt and Erik Rowan) ended in a No Contest after the lights went out and upon coming back up John Cena was tied up in the ropes wearing a sheep mask, surrounded by the Wyatt's. The crowd chanted "This is awesome" as we crashed to commercial.
Match 7: Naomi (w/Cameron) defeated AJ Lee (w/Tamina) via Count-Out in 1:00 when AJ Lee walked out.
After the match Vickie Guerrero came out on the stage and announced AJ Lee would have to defend the Divas' Championship at WrestleMania in a Vickie Guerrero Clusterfuck Challenge, facing Cameron, Naomi, Nikki and Brie Bella, Natalya, Layla (she's back!), Eva Marie, Alicia Fox, Emma, Rosa Mendes, Aksana, Summer Rae and Tamina. AJ Lee freaked out and Tamina smiled.
Razor Ramon (note not Scott Hall) was announced as presumably the final inductee into the 2014 WWE Hall of Fame.
Randy Orton vs. Batista was made for the go-home RAW.
They showed a graphic of Daniel Bryan's tweet from earlier tonight about not being medically cleared to wrestle tonight.
Bray Wyatt vs. Big Show was announced for Friday.
Main Event: Dean Ambrose and Seth Rollins (w/Roman Reigns) beat The Real Americans (w/Zeb Colter) after Seth Rollins hit the Peace of Mind. After the match Roman Reigns levelled Cesaro with the Superman Punch, followed up with a Spear on the floor. The Shield then dismantled the announce table and put Cesaro through it with the second Triple Power Bomb of the night. Suited and booted, Kane and The Outlaws came out on the stage. Kane announced The Shield had been signed to a match at WrestleMania against all three of them in a 6 man tag.
Brock Lesnar, accompanied by Paul Heyman, were shown heading down the hallway towards the ring.
Finally, in a rather crappy segment, Brock Lesnar and Paul Heyman made their way to the ring. Heyman introduced himself and said his client's opponent at Mania holds one of the most staggering achievements in history, and his record at Mania is 21-0. He humbly stated that isn't just a streak, but an undefeated streak, which is why at WrestleMania when Lesnar beats The Streak, that will take nothing away from the accomplishment of 21 victories. Heyman said Cena, Andre and even Lesnar haven't and will not be able to claim that achievement.
Lesnar snatched the microphone and told Heyman enough of all the talking. He wasn't here to promote, he was hear to fight. Lesnar demanded Undertaker get to the ring and "Do [high pitched shrieky voice] This". Druids came out and proceeded to wheel a casket to the ring. After much hesitation and stomping on the lid, Lesnar opened it up to reveal that it was empty. As Heyman started berating the slum that is Brooklyn, the casket re-opened to reveal Undertaker inside, who then sat up. Undertaker and Brock Lesnar then got into it, with Undertaker quickly getting the upper hand with body shots. Undertaker then clotheslined Lesnar over the top rope and onto and over the casket. Lesnar retreated up the ramp, before pointing at the WrestleMania XXX sign to take RAW off the air.
- Joined in 2008
- Location: Botswana
WWE RAW Results 31st March 2014 wrote:
Location: Washington, DC
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry "The King" Lawler, John "Bradshaw" Layfield.
The bell tolled to signal the start of RAW and the arrival of The Undertaker. Undertaker lost his balance on the ring steps and nearly fell off. Crowd chanted "UN-DER-TAKER" anyway. He said 21 men have stepped up and 21 men have been sent down. Undertaker continued that while he did not claim to be better than his victims, at WrestleMania he goes further than anyone else, and that is why The Streak stays alive. Undertaker said that there are people that believe in 3 things that cannot be beaten: Death, Taxes, and The Streak. At Wrestlemania, Brock Lesnar will Rest. In. Peace. This brought out Brock Lesnar and his "advocate" Paul Heyman. Heyman vowed that the most historic Wrestlemania Moment since Hulk Hogan defeated Andre The Giant will take place on Sunday when his client defeats the Undertaker. He said that is not a prediction, but a spoiler. Brock and Heyman then made their way down to the ring. After much stalling and teasing on the outside, Paul Heyman finally distracted Undertaker by sliding a steel chair into the ring. 'Taker briefly got the better of the situation with body shots to Lesnar, but Lesnar quickly ran him over with a Clothesline & delivered an F5, leaving him laying in the middle of the ring.
Match 1: Alberto Del Rio defeated Intercontinental Champion Big E. in a non-title outing with a kick to the head.
Over on the WWE App, fan voting was open for which member of The Shield should face Corporate Kane.
Randy Orton vs. Batista was reiterated as our main event tonight.
"Farewell to the Yes Movement" from the McMahon's was announced for later.
Whistling "he's got the whole world in his hands" signalled another promo from the Wyatt Family. Bray said kids will cry and ultimately see John Cena in the same way he does. Something along those lines anyway...
We got a recap of 'reality' show Total Divas, in which Summer Rae and Natalya had a confrontation outside. After being called a stripper, Summer Rae slapped Natalya in the face, which led to Natalya telling her to "Get off my property". It's easier to suspend disbelief watching RAW at this point.
SPONSORED BY DOMINO'S.
Vickie Guerrero joined the commentators. She explained all the Divas' will be in the ring on Sunday, one fall to a finish.
Match 2: Summer Rae pinned BRET HART IS COMI...no, it's just Natalya with a kick to the head.
Stephanie and Triple H were shown walking backstage on the way to the ring.
Back from commercial, The Authority made their way out as the announcers told us to buy the WWE Network NOW, presumably aware the thing is going to collapse come the weekend if everyone attempts to order it. Stephanie McMahon said that they're letting everyone say goodbye to the Yes Movement before her husband destroys Daniel Bryan at Wrestlemania XXX. Hunter responded by saying he wasn't even sure how much the crowd are going to care, as there is no loyalty in this generation. They just want to feel like they're apart of something - a flavour of the day, which they can then just move on from; something that doesn't require any work or effort. They then started humming & dancing to the Fandango theme, Triple H mockingly asking 'Remember that guy?'. We then threw it all away as we lost interest & didn't give a crap. Hunter said "the kid" is a "solid B+, maybe an A player", but we didn't care, we just moved on.
Stephanie asked how many of the crowd want to see Daniel Bryan tonight. Crowd chanted "YES". Stephanie then laughed at how easy it was it was to get everyone chanting for him again. She then revealed he wouldn't be on RAW yet again, as what was best for Daniel Bryan was to go to New Orleans early & rest up. Triple H said the YES Movement was nothing more than a myth and a fallacy; we want to believe that Daniel Bryan is an A+ player but he isn't. Hunter says it's like all of the people who think that he only has all of his power and success because he married well; he will be the first to admit that he "married spectacularly", as he kissed Stephanie. Hunter claimed that the reason he has what he has is because of his dominance in the ring, & the reason he has stayed at the top. We then got a hilarious egotistical video package, narrated by Stephanie McMahon, featuring various Superstars that were once something & had a huge fan following but were all ultimately beaten by Triple H. Chris Jericho, Scott Steiner, Goldberg, Jeff Hardy...Hunter said that while those guys were great, they were just players in the game and 'HE IS THE GAME MORE THAN EVER'. Yeah well, somebody needs to tell him this game has too many strawberry floating levels in it. This brought out Batista in a NBA jersey. Batista said that while he would love to say Goodbye to the YES Movement, he noticed that he wasn’t in the video package because Triple H has never beaten him. Hunter responded by asking if Batista ever has anything new to say & then insulted his dress sense. Batista fired back that perhaps Triple H should be focusing on Daniel Bryan rather than a Championship match he might not even be in; but then Hunter is the brains of the operation and Stephanie the brawn. It was then Randy Orton's turn to come out. He said that if Stephanie was going to slap the taste out of Batista’s mouth, then he wanted a ringside seat. Orton claimed he has the utmost respect for Triple H, and he knows he'll beat Bryan, but requested he once again reconsider inserting himself into the Triple Threat. Hunter told him that no amount of ass kissing was going to change the fact that Orton's reign is coming to an end...unless he can manage to find The Viper again. Hunter then told Orton that his match tonight against Batista was now No Disqualification.
In a WCW move in not announcing something until the 2nd hour, they revealed Piper's Pit will return later tonight.
They announced the 2nd hour of the WrestleMania Pre-Show (11pm UK time) is exclusively on the WWE Network. That 2nd hour contains the WWE Tag Team Championship Fatal Four Way.
Match 3: The Usos and The Matadores defeated Ryback and Curtis Axel and The Real Americans when the Matadores pulled the switcharoo, feigned being on the receiving end of Swagger's Patriot Lock, and then rolled him up for the pin.
Match 4: The Rhodes' Brothers defeated Damien Sandow and Fandango (w/Summer Rae) when Goldust pinned Damien Sandow with the Final Cut. Boy, has Damien Sandow's stock fallen...
We got a recap package on Kane gaining his revenge on The Shield from last week's SmackDown.
The Shield were backstage . They said they almost feel bad for Kane, as it's like murders row back here. They ended by saying that at WrestleMania they're going to teach "those kids" the meaning of Attitude.
The Wyatt Family made their way out.
Match 5: Bray Wyatt (w/The Family) defeated R-Truth (w/Xavier Woods) off Sister Abigail. Woods was then chopped down & quickly dispatched off afterwards
The lights dimmed and The Wyatt's posed in the ring. A guy in overalls & a sheep's mask then walked up behind the 3 of them. After an extended stare down, the mystery man removed his mask to reveal himself as...JOHN CENA. Cena quickly dropped Luke and delivered an AA to Erik. Bray managed to slip out & made his escape to the outside.
Match 6: In a non-title Lumberjill match, Naomi (sans eye patch) pinned WWE Divas' Champion AJ Lee after sticking her arse in AJ'a face.
WWE WrestleMania Press Conference tomorrow at 11am Eastern on the WWE Network.
Renee Young interviewed a serious looking John Cena. Makes a change. He said desperate times calls for desperate measures. Bray spouts his propaganda; that this Sunday he will turn Cena into a monster. Cena said at WrestleMania he will be a monster for a day as it'll secure a legacy for a lifetime. Cena then managed to get a forced plug for the Network in there, before stating he's going to stick his foot in Bray's ass. After walking off, he left Renee Young standing there looking as if she wanted to rip Cena's clothes off. No, she really did...
We went to the Backstage Pass sports desk with Alex Rley, Booker T and #BadNewsBarrett.
We got a recap of the opening segment.
Jerry Lawler revealed to the Live crowd that a gigantic 80% had voted for Roman Reigns to face Kane.
Match 7: Kane defeated Roman Reigns via Disqualification in a nothing 2 minute match when The Shield walked in and put the boots to Kane. The Outlaws made the save and dragged Kane out of the ring, protecting him from another Triple Power Bomb. Begs the question why even have the fan voting in the first place...
Hulk Hogan is on SmackDown for the first time in over a decade.
Piper's Pit segment was next, which quickly resulted in all and sundry interrupting and it descending into a prelude for the Andre the Giant Battle Royal. Big Show was left the last man standing, having his hand raised by Rowdy Piper. Highlight of this was Piper saying "professional wrestling" and Dolph Ziggler coming down & emphasising "Sports entertainment" directly in Piper's face.
They recapped Stephanie slapping Batista last week, in association with DOMINO'S PIZZA.
Stephanie McMahon and Triple H came out for commentary. Stephanie is quite horrendous.
Main Event: In a non-title No Disqualification match, WWE Champion Randy Orton vs. Batista ended in an apparent No Contest when Daniel Bryan attacked Triple H at the announce table. After then beating Hunter senseless with a Kendo Stick, Daniel Bryan then dispatched of Orton and Batista in the ring as well. With the crowd chanting "YES!" at the top of their lungs in unison with Daniel Bryan, Stephanie McMahon held back her livid husband on the stage. Hunter screamed that Bryan was done come WrestleMania.
- Joined in 2008
- Location: Botswana
WWE RAW Results April 7 2014 wrote:
Location: New Orleans, Louisiana
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry "Milk of Amnesia" Lawler and John "Bradshaw" Layfield
With WrestleMania in the books for another year, Monday Night RAW exploded onto the air with the crowd chanting "YES! YES" YES!" at the top of their lungs and the arrival of new WWE World Heavyweight Champion Daniel Bryan. The crowd, legitimately one of the hottest in the history of the entire programme, chanted "DANIEL BRYAN" for a solid minute. Bryan asked if they ever get tired, to which the crowd responded with "NO! NO!". Bryan joked that it's hard to do the Yes! Chant holding two belts but he'll do it 1 more time anyway. Daniel said that it was funny because over two years ago he started doing the chant, and now a day after WrestleMania XXX, everyone was united with that one word. Crowd erupted into "You Deserve it". Bryan said that while he might deserve it a little bit, he thinks the crowd are the ones that deserve it more & that their power brought about the change. King of Kings then bellowed out and The Authority made their way out. Triple H got up on the ring apron, immediately greeted to thunderous chants of "ASSHOLE! ASSHOLE!". The WWE, embracing it, panned the crowd. Hunter said that he wasn't going to get into the ring as he doesn't want to do something he will regret. Bryan asked Hunter if he was sure he wasn't getting in the ring, before then taking both Championship belts, walking right into Triple H's face & lifting both titles up and down while shouting "YES!" along with the crowd. Hunter smirked and told him to enjoy his moment as it wasn't going to last beyond the night. Hunter told Daniel Bryan to enjoy his moment because that is all it was going to be, a moment. Triple H then revealed that in the main event Daniel Bryan would have to defend the World Title against...him. As Stephanie and Triple then huffed and puffed their way up the ramp, Bryan led the crowd in yet more chants of "YES!".
Stephanie McMahon was in the RAW office telling her husband that she couldn't wait for him to shut the whole Yes movement down and shut the people up once and for all. Batista walked in and said none of this would have happened had Triple H not lost last night. Orton then stormed in and said he wants his rematch as it's in his contract. Batista said he wants his rematch as well. Hunter responded by telling them that he is the COO and it is his job to run things the way he sees fit. The McMahon's told them both that they will get their rematches, just not tonight. Instead Batista and Randy Orton will team up later to face The Usos for the WWE Tag Team Championship. Batista and Orton, not even remotely impressed, said they didn't want the tag belts. Hunter said this is happening for one reason and one reason only; when the three of them were on the same page, no one on the roster could stop them.
Crowd clapped along to the arrival of The Wyatt Family.
Match 1: In what was a very lively 6 man tag, in front of a crowd that were positively losing their gooseberry fool at this point, Bray Wyatt, Luke Harper, and Erik Rowan defeated John Cena, Intercontinental Champion Big E, and Sheamus (or the heels) when Bray planted Big E with Sister Abigail. John Cena looked on aghast from the aisle-way.
We got a trailer for WWE Slam City. Well, the Americans did. Sky went to commercial break.
They aired a vignette for Bolieve, the début of Bo Dallas onto the main roster.
Match 2: In a 2 minute comedy bout, Santino and Emma defeated Fandango and Summer Rae when Emma applied the Emma Lock to Summer Rae. After the match she did that silly arm dance.
Brock Lesnar (sporting a black eye), accompanied by Paul Heyman, made their way out to the ring. Crowd booed somewhat mildly.
Paul Heyman introduced himself and said it was the greatest privilege of his career to serve as the advocate for the beast incarnate Brock Lesnar, the conqueror of Undertaker's Streak. Crowd booed & then chanted "BULLSHIT". Heyman said he understood as they're all in shock, but it just goes to show their lack of intelligence as they were told this would happen. Heyman said Brock wasn't here to put smiles on people’s faces, he's here to put tears in the eyes of children. He said that now we know all of the headlines, it is time to go off page and "shoot from the hip". 5 seconds after walking through the curtain at WrestleMania, Undertaker collapsed, and as the paramedics were all panicking around him backstage, Vince McMahon left WrestleMania to go ride with the Undertaker to the hospital. Heyman said Undertaker was being treated for a concussion. Undertaker came "this" close to a broken neck and a cracked skull. Heyman said the greatest thing that 'Taker ever did was not to kick out of the 3rd F5 as Brock would have beaten Undertaker to the point that it would have changed the complexion of tonight’s show, and that Brock would have continued until The Streak was dead. Heyman turned his attention to the announce table, as when the match was over last night JBL and 'those other two who call themselves announcers' stood up and gave a standing ovation to The Undertaker, the guy who lost. Heyman said Lesnar taught him that there is always a winner and a loser, and last night, Undertaker "was a loooser". Heyman also got a shot in at Hogan calling it the Silverdome. Heyman said that since this is apparently the wildest crowd of the year, everyone feels empowered because they are like every single member of the WWE Locker room: a bunch of wannabes. When Brock came through the curtain, no one gave him a standing ovation. They all looked down because no one respects him. Hell, Brock does not respect anyone either and he barely even tolerates him. Therefore Brock is certainly not going to care about anyone who flies around the world just to get themselves noticed on television. Heyman mentioned the octagon, and name checked Daniel Bryan, Undertaker and John Cena as "wannabes". Heyman said Hogan, Austin and Rock could never manage to be the NCAA, UFC, and Undisputed Champions. They are wannabes too. In comparison Brock is the ONE. The 1 in 21-1.
We got another vignette, this time of the "Exotic Express" and the arrival of NXT wrestler Adam Rose up to the main shows.
Match 3: Tag Team Champions The Uso Brothers vs. Batista and Randy Orton quickly ended in a Double Count Out when Orton and Batista wasted the brothers on the outside. Batista then Powerbombed one of them onto the steel stairs. Crowd spent the 3 minutes chanting for the announcers, "Y2J" and "CM Punk".
Match 4: A returning RVD pinned Damien Sandow with the Five Star Frog Splash. The crowd single-handedly made it 'a moment' because this was a nothing comeback.
Journey to WrestleMania: Daniel Bryan exclusively on the WWE Network tomorrow night.
Match 5: Returning to action #BadNewsBarrett pinned Rey Mysterio off the Bullhammer. Crowd started a loud "Wade Barrett Barmy Army" chant. Lawler had no clue as to what they were going on about.
Back on the Exotic Express, Adam introduced us to some of his friends.
Match 6: "The Bulgarian Brute" Alexander Rusev (w/"The Ravishing Russian" Lana, whose voice is diabolical.) demolished Zack Ryder and tapped him out with a Camel Clutch.
We got highlights of Saturday's Hall of Fame.
As we rolled into the third and final hour, the man that makes 3 hours feel like 10 rolled on in to RAW: the Ultimate Warrior, appearing on RAW for the first time since 1996. For those wondering no he didn't appear in a mirror or from underneath the ring in a cloud of fire extinguishers & dry ice.
Ultimate Warrior, looking genuinely happy to be there, came out wearing a suit. He limped his way down to ringside as the cameras shot back to the announcers, allowing Warrior to put on his patented jacket. Warrior shook the ropes & then asked the fans to "Speak to me Warriors!". He said as he was preparing to come out here, he was having trouble finding the right words. He then pulled out a child's Warrior mask from his jacket pocket, put it on & told the "Warrior" to shut up and let him talk. And so ensued one of his rambling promos. Warrior said that backstage he sees many potential Legends with Warrior’s spirit, and it's up to the fans to decide if they live with the passion and intensity so much that they will tell their stories. Or something like that. Look, you try summarising his guff at 3am. He signed off by saying the spirit of Ultimate Warrior will live forever.
Divas' Champion AJ Lee and Tamina were shown backstage heading towards the ring.
We got a short but great video package from WWE, simply stating to us the fans "thank you".
AJ Lee and Tamina made their way out to the ring. AJ said that for 295 days she has been our WWE Divas Champion, the longest reigning Divas champion of all time. AJ said that a couple of months ago she tore the Divas a new one, and she gave them 294 days to prove her wrong, alas at WrestleMania she proved she is the hero in this story. At Mania it was AJ Lee vs. The World, and she has gone from the poor girl in New Jersey to being the "Best Diva in the World", which was unsurprisingly greeted by a "CM Punk" chant from the crowd. AJ proclaimed that she is the Divas Division. NXT night continued, as this brought out "NOR-WHICH's own" Paige. AJ Lee asked what she was doing here. Paige said she came to do what no one else would, and that's congratulate AJ on her victory last night. AJ thanks Paige and said this is what all of the other Divas should be doing. However AJ said that she doesn’t need Paige’s congratulations, so she should just go back to NXT and not interrupt the champion ever again. AJ called her ‘The Sweetest Little Crumpet’. AJ then said that she may as well do to Paige what she did to every Diva last night. Paige replied that she wasn't ready for a match tonight. AJ Lee slapped her in the face and asked if she was ready now. AJ then said she was going to put the Divas' title on the line, and demanded a referee get down to the ring. "This is awesome" broke out prior to the bell.
Match 7: In her début match on RAW, Paige defeated AJ Lee (w/Tamina) with a leg sweep - which was supposed to be the Paige Turner - after reversing the Black Widow to capture the WWE Divas' Championship in 2:00. AJ Lee freaked out in the ring as Paige celebrated on the stage & kissed the belt. Big crowd reaction to Paige in front of what has to be at least a 50% British crowd.
We got another Bo Dallas vignette. Bolieve in Yourself.
The Andre The Giant statue was in the ring. Hulk Hogan came out to a decent reception from the crowd but nowhere near as loud as you'd expect. Hogan said last night we witnessed one of the biggest and baddest WrestleMania's of them all inside the SUPERDOME in New Orleans. Hogan continued that there were a lot of great moments last night, but the one he loved the most was the Andre the Giant Memorial Battle Royal. He said as he was watching Big Show get launched over the top rope, he knew that Andre was looking down with a smile on his face. Hogan revealed that while there was supposed to be 30 men in the Battle Royal, there ended up being 31. Hogan then brought out Cesaro, accompanied by Zeb Colter. Hogan congratulated Cesaro, then handed him the microphone and exited stage left. Cesaro was about to speak but Zeb snatched the mic away. Colter said he wanted to talk about what kind of guy Cesaro is. He said he brought Cesaro into the fold several months ago as a "Real American." And not only did he make him a "Real American", but a "Zeb Colter Guy." Cesaro cut off Zeb, revealing that he's not a Zeb Colter Guy after all. Rather, he's a Paul Heyman Guy. Out came Paul Heyman to a big reaction. Heyman said not only is he the strategist for Brock Lesnar, but now the advocate for the "King of Swing". Heyman confronted Colter, telling "Grandpa" that on behalf of his new client, he would like to instruct JBL and "the other two clowns" on how to discuss the future of his new client. Heyman left to the outside as Zeb confronted Cesaro in the ring. Jack Swagger then nailed Cesaro from behind. Swagger took the Andre trophy and smashed it to pieces, dumping it over the top rope to the floor. Cesaro recovered, hitting the ring and Clotheslining Swagger over the top rope to the floor. The cameras then abruptly cut away... to a commercial for Total Divas.
Match 8: Cesaro (w/Paul Heyman) defeated Jack Swagger via Count Out when Swagger did a runner at the prospect of taking a Cesaro Swing. Crowd called Swagger a "PUSSY", which for the first time tonight did result in WWE turning the crowd volume down a notch.
The Shield vs. The Wyatt Family was announced for WWE Main Event tomorrow night on the WWE Network.
WWE showed the multiple headlines garnered around the world from Undertaker's Streak coming to an end.
In the RAW office, Stephanie told Kane and The Shield that it was up to them to make sure Triple H leaves as Champion tonight. The Shield teased Kane as to where his buddies had gone. Kane said they don't realise they're all on thin ice. As Kane continued to rant away, Stephanie stepped in and told him & The Shield that tonight they're all going to be on the same page as what Triple H wants, Triple H gets. She asked if she made herself clear. Roman Reigns responded by saying "crystal". The Shield then made their exit.
Big Show vs. Cesaro was made for SmackDown.
Daniel Bryan made his way out for the Championship match. Batista and Randy Orton immediately came out and circled the ring. After overpowering Bryan, Orton dropped him with an RKO. Batista then followed it up with a Batista bomb. This brought out Director of Operations Kane. After initially telling them both to back off, Kane goozled Bryan and planted him with a Chokeslam. Triple H and Stephanie McMahon finally walked on down to the ring, ordering Mike Chioda to ring the bell. The bell sounded, but before anything could happen The Shield's music hit and they came through the crowd. Crowd chanted "Time for justice". Kane, Batista, and Orton on one side of the ring, and The Shield on the other, got up on the apron. Hunter said this wasn't going to happen. Both sides then got in the ring, Triple H demanding everyone stand down. Roman Reigns then Speared Triple H and so ensued a mass brawl between the two sides. With Team Authority dispatched, The Shield turned their attention to Triple H. After demanding they back down once more, Triple H turned around right into a Running Knee from Daniel Bryan. Bryan stood in the ring with The Shield, leading the crowd in another round of "YES!" chants, with a furious Triple H & company in the aisle-way, taking RAW off the air!
- Joined in 2008
- Location: Botswana
WWE RAW Results April 14 2014 wrote:
Location: Birmingham, Alabama.
Commentary: Michael Cole, Jerry "The King" Lawler, and John "Bradshaw" Layfield
This very special edition of WWE RAW, in memory of the Ultimate Warrior, opened with the entire roster - including Vince McMahon - on stage for a video package and 10 bell salute. Part of the video was fittingly narrated by Warrior's promo from last week's RAW. Most in the crowd were wearing Warrior masks, handed out earlier by WWE.
In a rematch from last week, Batista and Randy Orton will face Tag Team Champions The Uso Brothers later tonight.
They announced an eight-man tournament would begin tonight to determine a new number 1 contender for the Intercontinental Championship, beginning with RVD vs. Alberto Del Rio; Mark Henry vs. Cesaro; Sheamus vs. Jack Swagger; and Dolph Ziggler taking on #BadNewsBarrett. The winner going on to face Big E at Extreme Rules in May.
The show has only been on the air 15 minutes and already featured 2 commercial breaks.
Match 1: RVD defeated Alberto Del Rio with the Five Star Frog Splash to advance in the Intercontinental Championship Tournament.
Michael Cole revealed WWE Champion Daniel Bryan would not be on the show tonight, instead off honeymooning with new wife Brie Bryan.
We got a package recapping last week's altercation between The Authority, Daniel Bryan and The Shield.
Triple H, Stephanie McMahon, Batista, and Randy Orton were shown talking in the RAW office. Talking of that office, what's happened to RAW General Manager Brad Maddox...
ULTIMATE MOMENTS #1: Ultimate Warrior defeats The Honky Tonky Mans to capture the Intercontinental Championship at the inaugural WWF SummerSlam, August 29 1988.
Back in the RAW Office, Hunter and Steph were telling Batista and Orton that collectively they can't be stopped no matter how powerful The Shield are. Batista said that while that sounds great, all he wants to be is champion. Orton agreed, telling them that they're on their own. As they left, Stephanie turned to her husband and said she has an idea...
Match 2: Ryback and Curtis Axel beat Goldust and Cody Rhodes when Ryback pinned Rhodes off a Clothesline. They're now doing a pretty awful mash-up of Ryback and Mr Perfect's rejigged music.
We got a trailer for WWE Legends House. Well, the US did. Sky decided 'Nah' & immediately cut to break.
Match 3: WWE Divas' Champion Paige pinned Alicia Fox in a non-title outing with a "modified Scorpion Crosslock", which looked impressive and got a positive reaction from the crowd. Either Paige was covered in bruises or Alicia's bronzer was coming off everywhere...
Match 4: The Usos vs. Randy Orton and Batista ended in Disqualification when The Shield jumped Randy Orton on the outside, before turning their attention to Batista in the ring. Reigns smashed him with the Superman Punch. Both men then retreated up the aisle.
ULTIMATE MOMENTS #2: Warrior defeats Hulk Hogan for the WWF Championship at WrestleMania VI April 1, 1990.
Sky Sports are offering a chance to win a private screening of The Amazing Spider-Man 2 for you and TEN friends at a local cinema, plus a trip to London for two to attend the WWE Smackdown taping, live at The O2 on Tuesday 20th May. Go to http://www.skysports.com/superhero to enter.
Orton and Batista were walking backstage when they bumped into The Authority. Triple H just shook his head and said "told you".
Paul Heyman made his way out into the stage. Heyman said that he knows the crowd expect him to drive home that Brock Lesnar defeated The Undertaker at WrestleMania. Heyman then repeatedly said 'Lesnar conquered The Streak' over and over and over again. He then got the guys in the truck to put up some "historical" photos of Undertaker at WrestleMania XXX, at the request of Brock Lesnar. He finally introduced Cesaro, sans music.
Match 5: Cesaro (w/Paul Heyman) advanced in the Intercontinental Championship Tournament, defeating Mark Henry with The Neutraliser. Cesaro almost slipped off the apron.
Speak of the devil, Triple H and Stephanie were in the office talking to RAW GM Brad Maddox. Hunter told him to go find The Shield and tell them that they have a match later against mystery opponents.
Lana, sporting an overly tango'd face and a thoroughly annoying voice, introduced Rusev to "What" chants. Lawler buried her voice on commentary.
Match 6: Alexander Rusev obliterated Xavier Woods in under a minute and tapped him out with a camel clutch. R-Truth attacked Rusev after the bell. Lana stepped in and told Rusev to back off...before then sending Rusev to kick Truth in the face.
ULTIMATE MOMENTS #3: Ultimate Warrior defeats Ravishing Rick Rude inside the blue bars at SummerSlam, August 27, 1990.
Match 6: Sheamus pinned Jack Swagger (w/Zeb Colter) off a Brogue Kick to advance in the tournament.
Back on The Exotic Express, they re-aired the vignette from last week.
Damien Sandow was in the ring. He said regardless of how we or any of the roster feels about him, he is the most deserving person in the WWE. Big Show came out but Sandow continued regardless & said he wasn't going to be silenced no matter who they sent out. Big Show just stood there while Sandow rant and raved. Sandow said the crowd should be bent over with their arms outstretched begging to touch him when he comes to the ring as he "deserves it". He walked over to Show in the corner and told him that he deserves to be WWE Champion as he is the future of the company. Big Show then just punched him in the face and left.
The Wyatt Family cut in on the Tron; Bray simply saying "we're next".
Bray and his Family came out. Bray said society was a vile and putrid thing; do as we're told so says 'the man', where we see what they want us to see and feel. He however is different. Bray said that while we see a blank canvas, he sees a beautiful painting. We can call him by whatever name we see fit, but he has never once lied. John Cena however has made a career out of lying; a man who earns our trust by opting to put on a porcelain smile. Bray continued that he has Cena right where he wants him, against the ropes, and all he now needs is one more little push, and right now all he wants to do is come out and play. Bray invited Cena to the ring. Cena dutifully obliged. Cena on the stage all smiles and laughs said he wants to have some fun. The Wyatt family are always so serious, so if he could just get them to Happy Hour they would be the life of the party. Cena did some 'jokes' - saying Bray comes out wearing a Michael Jackson glove and silly Hawaiian shirt. Cena revealed he'd managed to find Sister Abigail on MySpace. A photo went up on the Tron of Bray in black and white wearing a bonnet. We then got a mocked up photo of Bray's Mum off Tinder - Luke Harper, again in black and white, sitting in a rocking chair. Commentators were 'laughing'. Cena then revealed he'd got TMZ to find a newborn baby called Chastity Lynn Wyatt - this time it was Erik Rowan's head on a baby. Bray sarcastically said he cant get enough of it; whenever someone gets in Cena's face all he does is make jokes. Cena then immediately got serious & said that at WrestleMania when his ass got serious Bray got beat. He said Bray needs to be careful what he wishes for as this time he’s going to get it, however the tables are going to be turned. What happens if Bray loses again? He will be the one who is the desperate man. Cena then issued Bray a challenge for Extreme Rules - to face him, minus his family, inside a steel cage. Bray said that he likes it, but what John doesn’t realise is that when playing catch with knives sooner or later one is going to get stuck; how can John be 100% sure that it won’t be him? Bray dropped to his knees and sung "He's got the whole world in his hands".
Jack Swagger vs. Big Show was announced for Main Event tomorrow night.
Match 7: In a complete load of rubbish, Fandango and Layla defeated Emma and Santino in 1:00.
In the RAW office Stephanie McMahon was chastising Kane over his failures to get the job done against The Shield and Daniel Bryan. She told him that he was now weak & pathetic. She asked what happened to the Big Red Machine that used to make children and women cry. Kane, having had enough, stood up & heavily breathed in Stephanie's face. He then turned his attention to his old mask which has been a permanent fixture in the office for months. Kane stared at it, before lifting the glass case surround off. Now holding the mask aloft, Kane said he was going to eviscerate Daniel Bryan and send him to the depths of hell.
Another Bolieve vignette.
We got a run down of what's coming up on the WWE Network for Warrior Week.
ULTIMATE MOMENTS #4: Ultimate Warrior's promo from last week's RAW.
Back on the Express bus, Adam was partying with a guy in a bunny outfit & the rest of his friends.
Match 8: #BadNewsBarret pinned Dolph Ziggler with the Bullhammer Elbow, having already kicked out of 2 of Barrett's signature moves. Ziggler had one of the worst spray tan jobs I've seen since Mr Kennedy many years ago. Amazed it didn't end up all over the canvas.
In an incredibly quick turn around considering he had only morphed back into the old Kane all of 20 minutes ago, we got a video package on the return of the Big Red Machine, which Daniel Bryan will have to deal with next week. Amazed this saw the light of day as it included Kane setting
a stunt manRoss on fire, tombstoning a priest and throwing Raven through a glass window.
Sheamus vs. Batista was made for SmackDown.
Main Event: The Shield defeated Alberto Del Rio, Jack Swagger, Fandango, 3MB, Titus O'Neil, Ryback, Curtis Axel, Rusev and BadNewsBarret by Disqualification in an 11-3 Handicap match when they all started beating up The Shield on the outside. After initially fighting them off, The Shield were quickly overwhelmed and destroyed. "EVOLUTION IS A MYSTERY" then filled the arena, Triple H, Batista, and Randy Orton slowly making their way down to the ring. Despite their best efforts to fight back, all 3 members of The Shield were dropped with RKOs and Batista Bombs. With Batista and Orton now holding onto a battered Roman Reigns, Triple H grabbed the microphone and told him to "Believe in Evolution". Hunter then planted Roman Reigns with a Pedigree. The lack of reaction from the crowd for the majority of this, outside of a brief chant for Daniel Bryan, was quite something.
- Joined in 2008
- Location: Botswana
WWE RAW Results 21st April 2014 wrote:
Location: Baltimore Arena; Baltimore
Commentators: Michael Cole, John "Bradshaw" Layfield, and Jerry "The King" Lawler
Monday Night RAW kicked off with an emotional and teary-eyed looking Daniel Bryan making his way out. Brie Bella was already in the ring leading the crowd in chants of "YES! YES!". When the music stopped their was a small smattering of boos, which immediately segued into the arrival of "principal owner" Stephanie McMahon coming out. Stephanie sarcastically congratulated Daniel and Brie on their wedding, telling them it was an 'organic, crunchy, rustic affair, if you are into that sort of thing'. As an aside Stephanie has an awful lot of sun spots on her arms now. Stephanie said that since the WWE is a family, they wanted to get them a wedding present, but nothing traditional as they are not a traditional company. Stephanie revealed what we all suspected, that Daniel Bryan will defend the WWE World Championship against Kane at Extreme Rules. Stephanie then told Bryan that he should make sure he gets his new wife out of the way. Kane's music filled the arena, his pyro exploding on the stage. Stephanie shouted 'Not now'. As Daniel Bryan and Brie Bella were backing off towards the time keepers table, Kane appeared from the crowd and started assaulting Bryan. Kane turned his attention to Brie, but Bryan made the save, allowing Brie to escape. Stephanie told her to run away and save herself. After running Bryan into the barricade, Kane picked up Bryan and Tombstoned him on the floor. With Kane continuing to ignore Stephanie's pleas for him to stop, Kane then Tombstoned him onto the steel steps. Stephanie mouthed "strawberry float" under her breath and demanded the EMTs to come help Bryan. As Bryan was being placed onto the stretcher Kane returned and dismantled the announce table, chucking a chair around in the process, which funnily enough appeared to have scripts taped to the underside of the seat. He then delivered a 3rd Tombstone to Daniel Bryan onto the table, which didn't break. The PG rating now completely going out the window, Stephanie then said to Kane "You...BASTARD". Kane headed up the ramp as RAW crashed to the ads.
Back from commercial break, Daniel Bryan was still being attached to the stretcher and wheeled out, Brie returning to his side. In the ring Stephanie clutching the WWE and World titles, and seemingly fighting a semi-grin, told the crowd to give a 'very warm round of applause' for Daniel.
Match 1: In a really great match, which the crowd were thoroughly into, #BadNewsBarrrett defeated Sheamus with the Bullhammer Elbow to advance to the Finals of the Intercontinental Number 1 Contenders Tournament.
They revealed Hugh Jackman will be Guest host on next week's RAW from St. Louis to promote his new movie X-Men: Days of Future Past, and reminded us all of his last visit with Dolph Ziggler. Apparently Ziggler, Jackman, and Sandow have got into some sort of Twitter war.
We were told to download the WWE App and choose John Cena's opponents for later tonight; Luke Harper on his own; in a Handicap match against Harper and Erik Rowan; or against all 3 members of the Wyatt Family.
The Wyatt's came out on the stage and Bray cut a promo. Bray asked if we'd just become a nation full of mindless sheep; tonight however being the perfect opportunity for change, with the power in our hands. Will we choose the path of less pain for our hero John Cena or was tonight the night that he finally learns the truth. Bray asked if we could now feel the change, as every time he and Cena cross paths, he takes more of John's fanbase from him. Bray led the crowd in singing 'he's got the whole world in his hands', before dropping to his knees.
Match 2: Los Matadores and El Torito defeated 3MB and Hornswoggle (w/Heath Slater) in 3:00.
In a Vintage Nitro moment, a limo was shown pulling into the building backstage. A suited-and-booted Evolution stepped out...sans Flair, unfortunately.
Fast forwarding from 1998 to 2003, Devolution came out, kicking off Hour number 2.
Triple H, whose voice was completely shot to pieces - presumably because of a cold - said it's funny when you take your kids across your knee and spank them like they did to The Shield. Orton took the microphone and said that it takes just a single spark to set the world on fire. We then got a video package of Evolution arriving in a helicopter from 2002/3 and destroying everyone, seguing neatly into last week. Back in the ring, Batista said The Shield has absolutely no idea what they've gotten themselves into. This brought out The Shield through the crowd. As they surrounded and then entered the ring, Evolution retreated and headed up the ramp to the stage. Dean Ambrose said that last week wasn’t the first time they've got beaten up and it won’t be the last. Ambrose asked if they looked humbled to them. Roman Reigns said that last week they were given an ultimatum, but this week they were going to give Evolution one. In a few moments, they are going to walk up there to kick their ass. Reigns said they have two options: Evolution can either be men and try to fight, or they can be "cream puffs" and cower away and hide. As The Shield were heading up the ramp to take on Evolution on the stage, the heels from the roster came out. Triple H says that there is an option 3: in life you either adapt or you perish. That is Evolution.
They recapped Bryan's destruction from the top of the broadcast. Cole revealed Bryan is in hospital receiving X-Rays and all that gubbins.
Adam Rose bus vignette
Ryback and Curtis Axel were on commentary.
Match 3: WWE Tag Team Champions The Uso Brothers defeated The Rhodes' in a non-title outing. After the match Ryback and Axel attacked The Usos' from behind and left them laying. They're also teasing dissension between The Rhodes', with Cody refusing to accept a hug from Goldust and storming off. Ryback was seemingly auditioning for a position on commentary, playing it pretty much straight the entire match...that admittedly only went about 4 minutes.
We got a clip of Mark Henry getting whack-a-moled by a penguin on Slam City.
Match 4: Emma (w/Santino) defeated Layla (w/Fandango) with a Pink Cobra. Layla looked fantastic here...even if there was a touch of the Doreen's about her at one point. Yes, that's a Birds of a Feather reference.
A floral Renee Young was with John Cena backstage. He wasn't smiling. Cena said his fate lies with the WWE Universe. In a matter of time we'll find out if they've listened to Bray. Crowd started a duelling "Let's go Cena/Cena sucks" chant. Cena said everywhere he goes he hears the same song: He's got the whole world in his hands. Cena said he is beginning to think he just might.
Cesaro came out with Paul Heyman. He now has new theme music, incorporating a loud siren/air-raid horn. I thought it was the re-introduction of the original RAW IS WAR intro from 1997. Paul Heyman cut a promo but was quickly cut off as they very abruptly went to commercial.
Back from commercial, Heyman was still banging on about The Streak ending. "My client, Brock Lesnar, conquered The Undertaker's undefeated Streak". RVD made the save from the repetitious Walrus.
Match 5: RVD beat Cesaro via Count Out to advance to the Finals of the Intercontinental Championship Tournament when Jack Swagger and Zeb Colter came out and Swagger posted Cesaro behind the referee's back. After the match, Cesaro was going to Swing Colter but Swagger made the save. Cesaro quickly regained the upper hand and Swung Swagger instead.
Michael Cole revealed Daniel Bryan had only suffered a "bad stinger". So don't worry everyone, Kane vs. Bryan is still on.
Renee Young interviewed RVD but was immediately cut off by Paul Heyman and Cesaro. Cesaro said RVD could never beat the King of Swing on his own. Heyman followed that the old RVD would never have taken a tainted victory. RVD responded by telling Cesaro not to let Heyman anywhere near your wallet, house and future. Paul asked if he was talking about him. "R.V.D" then walked off.
Match 6: In a rematch from SmackDown that we didn't need to see again, Paige defeated Aksana in a non-title outing. Crowd didn't care for this at all apart from the submission hold.
Cesaro vs. Jack Swagger made for SmackDown.
Lana came out and introduced Alexander Rusev.
Match 7: Rusev tapped out Sin Cara with the Camel Clutch. Crowd were now in the chant for JBL instead phase.
Another BO-LEAVE vignette.
Lawler revealed 53% had voted for Cena to wrestle a 3-1 Handicap match against the entire Wyatt Family.
Main Event: John Cena defeated The Wyatt Family by Disqualification when they all ran in and attacked Cena.
Bray Wyatt kissed Cena on the forehead and nailed Sister Abigail. Bray Wyatt took the microphone and said in time all things come to life, before once again singing "He's got the whole world in his hands" while clutching Cena in his arms to take RAW off the air.
- Joined in 2008
- Location: Botswana
WWE RAW Results April 28 2014 wrote:
Location: Scottrade Center; St. Louis, Missouri
Commentators: Michael Cole, John "Bradshaw" Layfield, and Jerry "The King" Lawler
A steel cage surrounding the ring opened the final RAW before WWE's Extreme Rules on Sunday. A sombre looking John Cena made his way out as the announcers revealed Roman Reigns will face Randy Orton later tonight; & The Uso brothers will defend the Tag Team Championship against Ryback & Curtis Axel. John Cena opened by asking "why?". Crowd booed. Cena asked why he deserved to be voted into a 3 on 1 Handicap match last week. Crowd responded by saying he sucked. John said that somebody once said that you either die as a hero or live long enough to become a villain, and he believes that sentiment. 10 years ago in St. Louis he was drafted to RAW, & on that night he heard one of the loudest ovations he had ever heard in his career. But fast forward to now & seemingly things have changed. Cena said he doesn't blame the fans, but he has had good & bad nights yet never once turned his back on the fans & always put the WWE first. John asked why they are so drawn to Bray Wyatt. Cena said he knows there will come a point where he will have to step aside, and he gets that, and he is excited for it. Superstars like Roman Reigns, Cesaro and Daniel Bryan. Names from NXT that many won't even be familiar with, such as Adrian Neville and Sami Zayn - they too have the same passion as him. By comparison, Bray Wyatt is a dangerous man. He is not like them; his passion is not the WWE, it is Bray Wyatt. Cena said on Sunday inside the cage, the Wyatt Family will be kept out whereas Bray Wyatt’s message will be kept in. If Bray manages to escape so will that message & he will continue to corrupt & manipulate all of us. Cena said we don't understand that soon it will be Bray Wyatt against the world and the world doesn't have a chance. The lights then suddenly went out and a child was heard singing "he's got the whole world in his hands". The lights then came back up to reveal an entire child choir singing on the stage. We got pretty much the entire song before RAW abruptly went to commercial.
Back from commercial, all the children were wearing sheep masks and now at ringside surrounding the steel cage. Bray Wyatt, accompanied by the Family, was in his rocking chair with a child on his knee laughing. John Cena meanwhile was on one knee, stunned & despondent in the ring. RAW then went to break once more.
They replayed Bray Wyatt leading the children in song to the ring, having occurred during what appeared to be, at least for some viewers, an unanticipated commercial. They changed the words to "He's got the whole C-Nation in his hands"
Match 1: The Usos' defeated Ryback and Curtis Axel to retain the WWE Tag Team Championship. Axel hit the Perfectplex on Jey but Jimmy was there with a big splash off the top for the pin. Jimmy sold a ankle/leg injury from around the halfway mark.
Michael Cole told US viewers Extreme Rules is not available for DISH or DirecTV customers. Hugh Jackman still to come.
Adam Rose vignette. Débuts on RAW next week.
Cesaro and Paul Heyman were talking in their locker room. Heyman said RVD was right when he said last week that he's a liar and unethical, but he takes his clients to the top. Cesaro put his hand on Heyman's shoulder and said that's all he needed to hear.
We got a package on Daniel Bryan being destroyed by Kane last week.
In the RAW office, the cameras panned to show Kane's mask back inside a glass case.
As Sheamus was making his entrance, Titus O'Neil ran out and attacked him from behind on the ramp & then continued to assault him prior to the bell.
Match 2: Sheamus pinned Titus O'Neil in 1:00 with the Brogue Kick, the only offence he managed to get in.
Doplh Ziggler was in the ring for a really rather rotten 10 minute segment. Ziggler said that this was his favourite time of the year. The weather gets a little hotter and the women wear a little less. More importantly, the super heroes return to the big screen. He plugged the new X-Men movie, which we then got a short trailer for.
Ziggler welcomed back "Wolverine". Jackman came out to a pretty decent reception. He said it was great to be back on RAW & anything can happen in WWE. Ziggler said that's funny, as last time he was here, "woo woo", something happened to him. They showed Jackman punching Ziggler in the mouth from the apron on a RAW in 2011. They dubbed in a much louder thud to get the punch over. Jackman said he wasn't going to bring it up. Ziggler joked even Jack Swagger hits harder than that. Ziggler said he forgives him as it gave him national exposure. They hugged. Damien Sandow then came out in an utterly ridiculous comic book super hero costume. It was supposed to be Magneto. After comedy that was anything but comedic, including Sandow manipulating Hugh’s microphone using magnetism - with comedy sound effects no less piped in - Jackman hip tossed Sandow and Ziggler put him down again with the ZigZag. Jackman and Ziggler celebrated.
We got a package from last week's RAW on Evolution & The Shield main event.
They noted this is the 1092nd episode of RAW. Paul Heyman came out. Heyman had a joke. "Knock Knock. Mike. Mike client Brock Lesnar conquered...". Heyman said he'll never mention the streak again, before introducing The Swiss Superman, The King Of Swing, Cesaro.
Match 3: In a surprisingly poor encounter, Cesaro (w/Paul Heyman) defeated Jack Swagger (w/Zeb Colter) with a German Suplex after Swagger was distracted by Paul Heyman sneaking up on Colter on the outside and pulling his moustache. Swagger has a new hair cut. He's still cutting it with a Flymo hedge trimmer.
Renee Young attempted to interview John Cena backstage on what happened earlier. He just stared at her, looked sad, and then walked off.
We got another look at Kane's mask in the office.
Match 4: Alberto Del Rio beat Cody Rhodes (w/Goldust) with the Arm Breaker. After the match Goldust tried to check on his brother but was pushed away.
Heyman and Cesaro were talking backstage, not that we could hear them.
Lana came out and introduced the well groomed brute Rusev. "What?" chants.
Match 5: Alexander Rusev defeated Xavier Woods by disqualification when R-Truth ran in just as Rusev was about to apply the Camel Clutch. Woods and Truth then sent Rusev packing over the top rope. Lana told him to back off.
John Cena was shown granting Make a Wish 402, 403 & 404 in a video package. Cena said wishing is powerful stuff. Cena isn't turning heel.
Renee Young interviewed RVD backstage. He said he has been Intercontinental Champion 6 times already, and 7 just so happens to be his lucky number. Colter turned up and told RVD that they have a common enemy in Paul Heyman therefore should work together. RVD replied by saying he has a mind of his own & will just continue being "R.V.D."
We got a run down of The Top 10 Most Watched Shows on the WWE Network from last week. Legends House episode 2 is #1.
Colter and Jack Swagger were shown talking backstage. Couldn't hear them either.
El Torito vs. Hornswoggle in the first ever WeeLC Match for the Extreme Rules Pre-Show, exclusively on the WWE Network.
Match 6: Heath Slater and Drew McIntyre (w/Jinder) defeated The Matadores when Heath got the pin. After the match El Torito took out 3MB on the outside.
Sheamus vs. Bray Wyatt made for Main Event on the WWE Network tomorrow night.
Stephanie McMahon, now beginning to look like Dixie Carter - no, she really is - made her way out to apologise to Daniel Bryan.
She said what happened was a senseless tragedy, and that she tried to stop Kane but he is unstoppable. Crowd booed. McMahon requested Bryan come to the ring. Nothing. Stephanie requested again, this time saying the Universe wants him to come out. Bryan finally walked onto the stage in a comedy neck brace, accompanied by wife Brie, who was chanting "YES!". Bryan said that he almost believed Stephanie when she demanded Kane to stop, but then everyone knows that Stephanie is full of crap. Stephanie replied by saying that she has earned that and she does not blame Daniel for believing it. She continued that it was true she & Triple H never wanted Daniel to be the WWE World Champion, & they both went to great lengths to stop him. Their emotions ran high and got out of control. Daniel interrupted, asking Stephanie how she thinks his wife felt after everything The Authority had done. Bryan asked Stephanie how it felt when Brie had to watch Triple H put his head in a bucket & attempt to drown him. Daniel said that he told Brie not to do anything about it because she knows he can handle it. Stephanie, turning her attentions to Kane, said that she was just trying to give her Director of Operations a backbone & give Bryan a worthwhile championship contender. She reiterated her apology. Daniel said that the audience agrees with him: Stephanie is still full of crap. Stephanie asked Bryan to come to the ring and look into her eyes so that he can see that she is truly sorry. Bryan said all he is going to see is a liar, & that she could snap her fingers & Kane can come out & attack him or his wife. Stephanie told Bryan that she doesn't know where Kane is, but his mask is locked up in the office. Stephanie said since Daniel isn't cleared to wrestle until Extreme Rules, she was going to give Brie an opportunity tonight instead. She announced Brie would face Paige for the Divas' Championship, & that match would be next. Daniel stepped in and said he will not let Brie come to the ring alone. Stephanie told him she had no problem with Daniel wanting to be at her side.
The cameras then cut backstage to reveal the glass case was now...EMPTY (sans dramatic music).
Match 7: WWE Divas' Champion Paige vs Brie Bella (w/Daniel Bryan) ended in a No Contest when Kane sliced the canvas open and attempted to drag Brie under the ring. Daniel Bryan made the save & nailed Kane with a wrench. Daniel Bryan then went to check on Brie, allowing Kane to sit back up. Bryan went to hit Kane with the wrench once again but Kane was able to counter and planted him with a Chokeslam. Brie then stupidly got back in the ring to check on her husband. Kane grabbed her again and attempted to drag her back under the ring. Brie managed to kick away and escape to the outside, where her husband was being attended to by medics and referees. Kane set off the pyro on the stage/ring posts and smiled. The red light hue is back, circa 1997. On another note, Brie's self tan ended up all over the canvas. Bet Vince loves that...
In the trainers room, Brie was shaking with fear while Bryan was being checked. Stephanie McMahon walked in apologising profusely, saying she had no idea Kane was going to do that. Brie then screamed at
DixieStephanie to "GET OUT...YOU BITCH!"
We got another recap of the opening segment.
Renee Young was outside John Cena's dressing room. She said Cena was now ready to be interviewed. A now jovial Cena said he was sorry about earlier. He said Bray proved him right, as he will go to great lengths to manipulate things. John said he thought the WWE Universe had turned their backs on him, but he is proud to know they haven't. There was noise. There was passion. Passion is hope and hope is fight. This Sunday the mind games stop, as he has special plans for Bray. He is going to buy him a donkey, a mule, and Bray and his new donkey friend can come to the ring & get a fist in his face, and his foot in his ass. Sorry, did I miss another segment?
BadNewsBarrett was on his podium. Barrett said RVD thinks he's going to beat him but he's got some Bad News. The WWE slogan is "Then. Now. Forever." RVD's slogan in comparison should just be "Then" as he was back in England wearing diapers the last time RVD was Intercontinental champion & relevant. After tonight RVD will be back in diapers drinking his dinners through a straw. "B.N.B". Cole on commentary questioned why Barrett was still wearing nappies as a teenager...
Match 8: BadNewsBarrett defeated RVD off the BullHammer to become Number 1 Contender for the Intercontinental Championship. During the match Cesaro and Paul Heyman came out and attempted to distract RVD but Jack Swagger came out and Cesaro and Swagger got into it on the outside. After the match, Cesaro attacked RVD at the bequest of Paul Heyman. Jack Swagger got back in the ring and levelled Cesaro. Swagger then turned his attention to RVD. RVD managed to regain the upper hand and hit the Five Star Frog Splash.
The Shield were in a corridor backstage. Ambrose said the clock is ticking and that they're going to expose the fact Evolution is going to get chewed up at Extreme Rules. Rollins continued that Evolution wear suits and expensive cars because they're small men, and that's what small men do to feel better about who they're not. The Shield is true power.
They recapped the main event of SmackDown.
Del Rio, Ryback and Curtis Axel will face Dean Ambrose in a 3-1 Handicap match on SmackDown with the Unites States Championship on the line
Evolution made their way out for the main event, followed by The Shield.
Right at the top of the hour Ric Flair made his return. Flair asked if he was in St. Louis, Missouri tonight, and sarcastically asked if he had ever been here before. Flair is looking really old now, not to mention having a very obvious speech impediment. In fact if you said he was somewhat inebriated I'd believe you. Flair said he had a lot of fun and he thanked everyone. Flair said he ran for years with the Four Horsemen and they ran wild. They styled and profiled and the same can be said for Evolution. Flair turned to Batista and said he he misses seeing him on those Saturday nights. In his years on the road, he has seen everything come full circle. He has seen the word greatness come full circle. He is surrounded by Superstars who exemplify power, style & grace. Flair then turned and revealed he was talking about The Shield, much to the surprise of Evolution. He shook each of their hands before leaving the ring. Somebody off screen was repeatedly going "Wooo" - it was either Flair or possibly, and more strangely, one of the announce team.
Main Event: Roman Reigns (w/Ambrose and Rollins) vs. Randy Orton (w/Triple H and Batista) ended in a No Contest when all of them ended up brawling around ringside. Evolution quickly got the upper hand and then proceeded to put the beating on all three men. The Shield managed to get a second wind and regain control on Evolution. Roman Reigns struck Triple H with a Spear. Orton and Batista attempted to make the save with steel chairs but were quickly taken out, allowing Triple H to escape to the floor. The Shield celebrated in the ring, Evolution retreating up the ramp, to take RAW off the air!
- Joined in 2008
- Location: Botswana
WWE RAW Results 5/5/14 wrote:
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler and John "Bradshaw" Layfield
Monday Night RAW began with The Shield making their way through the crowd, Dean Ambrose forced to defend the US Championship in a 20 man battle royal by The Authority.
Match 1: Sheamus defeated Dean Ambrose and 18 other men in a 20 man over-the-top-rope Battle Royal to capture the United States Championship. The match involved Big Show, Sheamus, Mark Henry, Ryback, Jack Swagger, Goldust, Cody Rhodes, Santino, Zack Ryder, Heath Slater, Dolph Ziggler, Damien Sandow and others. The finish saw Sheamus nail the Brogue Kick on Ambrose and toss him over the top. Aside from that, the most noteworthy thing was Dolph Ziggler getting eliminated by Santino with The Cobra.
King of Kings hit and out came Triple H onto the stage. He informed The Shield that it looked like their luck was running out. He then revealed all three would have to wrestle The Wyatt Family in tonight's main event.
They announced that in a rematch from last night's Extreme Rules, BadNewsBarrett will defend his newly won Intercontinental Championship against Big E.
Adam Rose vignette on his bus. He débuts later tonight.
Renee Young interviewed Sheamus backstage. She asked him if he had any words for Dean Ambrose, having just lost the title against 19 other men. Sheamus simply said "No hard feelings, fella".
Daniel Bryan was backstage with his wife when a grinning Stephanie knocked, loudly, on the door and walked in. She said all Bryan did was anger "the demon", and when he's angry it just leads to even more "unspeakable acts of violence", some of which he experienced first hand last night. Stephanie said the only way she could guarantee Bryan's safety tonight was if he stayed in the locker room until his match later. Bryan sarcastically thanked her. Stephanie left the room. Brie then told Daniel to "look". The camera panned to reveal Kane's mask hanging on the door.
Paul Heyman came out to a chorus of boos and cut a brief promo on, well, I think you've probably cottoned on by now...
Match 2: RVD defeated Cesaro (w/Paul Heyman) by Disqualification when Cesaro refused to stop attacking RVD who was upside-down in the corner.
As a brief aside WWE have a newish announce table. The desk is now black. A riveting fact, I'm sure you'll agree...
The announcers told us how we can go about earning $250 of gift vouchers for ourselves by introducing 10 friends to the WWE Network.
The Wyatt's interrupted on the Tron. Bray told us "we're here", before RAW crashed to break.
Back from break, Bray and his family were in the ring. Bray said Sister Abigail always told him he was born to lead, and that one day he will change the world. Bray said he believed her. Bray said the world we live in, this horrible world we live in, has a very wicked way about it. They would always snub their nose up at him and look down on him. They would refer to him as a piece of trash and a nobody. 'They' don’t even know it, but 'they' have made this current day so sweet and what a glorious day it is because last night, he became somebody. Last night, John Cena’s fear was personified by a singing child. They aired the demon child singing to Cena at the conclusion of last night's cage match. Bray said Cena would have everyone believe he just wants to see this world burn...and Cena would be correct. Bray said this world needs to be burnt down so it can be reborn, and it will be brought back up in the image of Wyatt. Cena however is lying when he says Brya only does this for himself; he does this for the poor man on the street and the teenage girl who wakes up crying because 'they' didn't think she was beautiful enough to be the prom queen.
Bray continued that he does this for all of us, whereas Cena will stand alone and fall. We can stand with Bray and never be alone. Bray knelt to his knees and started singing "He's got the whole world in his hands". Maybe about half of the crowd joined in.
Match 3: Ryback (w/Curtis Axel) pinned Cody Rhodes (w/Goldust) in an absolute snooze fest. Curtis ran Goldust into the ring post on the outside, the vibration seemingly causing Cody to lose his balance on the top rope and fall into the arms of Ryback for Shellshocked.
Brie and Bryan were in their locker room when the lights suddenly went out. Kane's mask was lit up on a lamp in the darkness. As Bryan and his wife were making their escape down the hallway they ran into Stephanie. She asked where they were going. Bryan responded by saying like she didn't know what was going on. Stephanie pleaded ignorance and noticed Brie was shaking with fear. Stephanie said she will have their car brought right up to the building. This is really making Bryan look idiotic.
The Matadores and the bull were in the ring. The ring was decked out in Mexican garb. El Torito threw sweets to the crowd. 3MB interrupted. Death segment. Jinder said this was America so they need to speak English. Crowd dutifully started chanting "USA". Drew McIntyre started speaking. Commentators asked if that was English. The little folk got into it, and then everyone started fighting. Crowd just boooed. This was strawberry floating crap.
Another BOLIEVE vignette, involving the troops.
Lana come out and got cheap heat by putting President Putin up on the Tron. Crowd chanted "USA!" again. She named dropped Edwin Snowden. Cole snort laughed.
Match 4: Alexander Rusev (w/Lana) tapped out Kofi Kingston with the Camel Clutch in front of a crowd quickly draining of energy.
They plugged the WWE Network again, this time on Xbox One.
Back to the 2 married goofs backstage, Bryan put Brie in the car. There was a cameraman IN THE CAR. Stephanie tapped on the window and made Brie jump out of her skin. She said Daniel will have to wrestle first, otherwise he'll be in breach of contract and stripped of the championship. They then got back out of the car as we headed to commercial.
Match 5: WWE Champion Daniel Bryan (w/Brie Bryan) tapped out Alberto Del Rio in a non-title outing with the Yes! lock. Crowd were really into Bryan, having awoken from their stupor.
After the match the pyro exploded on the posts, leading to Bryan and Brie to run backstage and into their car. "You've got to be kidding me, it's not starting". Bryan then got out and looked under the bonnet, to find a plug had been, well, unplugged. As he was pissing about with that, Kane appeared behind Brie in the car. Brie then started screaming like crazy. Bryan quickly opened the back door & attacked Kane. Kane then ended up on the roof as Bryan was attempting to start the car. After what seemed like forever, Bryan finally got the car going and Kane just comically fell off the roof (off screen). Bryan then immediately stopped the vehicle and got out, Brie asking him what the hell he was doing. Kane was just laying there, seemingly dead. He then sat up, Bryan running away back into the car as Brie began screaming her head off again. They drove off, with Kane quickly giving chase but failing. He then smiled as RAW went to break.
#BadNewsBarrett had some bad news. He said the deformed slobs in the audience are going to need cosmetic surgery to be worthy of their new champion. He unintentionally said this while pointing to some unfortunate woman in the front row.
Match 5: #BadNewsBarrett defeated Big E to retain the Intercontinental Championship after a horribly contrived ref bump led to the Bullhammer elbow. A portion of the crowd chanted for Barrett during the bout...and then very briefly, for CM Punk.
JBL mentioned Mark Selby winning the snooker world championship. Cole asked him to repeat himself and then completely no sold it. Cole later mentioned Triple H is now on Instagram, posting photos during RAW. Even the COO can't be bothered watching this programme...
They announced John Cena will be on Main Event Live tomorrow to respond to Bray Wyatt's comments from earlier. Yep, they're definitely trying to get people to purchase the WWE Network tonight.
We got a message from Mr T, taken from his Hall of Fame speech & set to 'a beat', thanking his mother to coincide with Mother's Day in America. This was a piss take and a half.
Zeb Colter cut a promo on illegal immigrants coming into America and WWE. Zeb introduced "Zeb's deportation list", which was a sign with Cesaro, Emma, Paul Heyman, Sheamus, Santino and Paige written on it. He said Sheamus and Paige should return home for no other reason than the sun hasn't hit their skin since 1997. Before he could carry on, Adam Rose's party goers interrupted on the stage, followed by Adam Rose. They carried him around ringside and placed him into the ring. When the music stopped some of the crowd were humming his entrance music. Saying that, the crowd were mostly flat and the sound of 1 or 2 fans LOUDLY going "BOOOOO" was the only audible noise. Rose told Zeb "don't be a lemon, be a rose bud". Swagger went to attack Rose but was promptly sent flying over the top rope. Everyone then started dancing around a bemused Colter. After all the vignettes, this felt decidedly rinky dink.
The announcers flogged the $25 friend Network offer again.
They announced Sheamus will defend his Championship against an undisclosed opponent on SmackDown. As in they probably haven't even figured it out themselves yet.
Main Event: The Wyatt Family defeated The Shield in the best...well, everything of the entire night. Bray Wyatt pinned Roman Reigns with Sister Abigail after Evolution interfered. Roman Reigns managed to hit the Superman punch on Triple H, but upon turning around was run over by Wyatt. Opening half of this match was greeted by an unwarranted "This is awesome" chant within the first minute & then strangely complete indifference thereon after.
Evolution laid waste to The Shield. Roman Reigns managed to reverse a Pedigree attempt with a backdrop but was promptly planted with an RKO, a Pedigree and then finally a Triple Power Bomb. Evolution posed to take a miserable RAW off the air.
- Joined in 2008
- Location: Botswana
WWE RAW Results 5/12/14 wrote:
Location: Bon Secours Wellness Arena; Greenville, South Carolina
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry "The King" Lawler, and John "Bradshaw" Layfield.
This had better be an improvement over last week. RAW opened with Rolf Harris making his way out, to the sounds of "Two Little Boys". Actually that's a lie. It started with a video package. The Shield were already in the ring. Dean Ambrose said what we saw last week was something that we don't see very often: all 3 members of The shield getting laid out. Seth Rollins took the microphone and said they were not running from Evolution, but running towards them. He then challenged them to a rematch at an unspecified date. Roman Reigns was angrily pacing up and down in the background, causing Rollins to pause and ask if he was okay. Reigns said they can serve their type of justice either cold or slow, as they were going to teach Evolution about the concept of payback. A limo appeared on the Tron pulling into the arena. Parts of the crowd were going "Woooo". Triple H was the first to emerge, followed by the other two members of Evolution. The Shield left the ring & ran backstage. As Triple H was signing something or other The Shield appeared and jumped Evolution taking them out. Referee's and agents quickly appeared and carted The Shield away.
John Cena & The Usos vs. The Wyatt Family is one of our main events for this evening.
Back from commercial, Zeb Colter was demanding the crowd shut up. Colter said last week he was unveiling one of the most important documents in US history since the Constitution and Declaration of Independence when he was interrupted by Rocky Horror show rejects. Adam Rose has been added to the Deportation sign. Colter said anyone who hangs out with a dude in a full grown bunny outfit has some moral questions to be asked of him. Colter demanded Rose keep his distance. As Colter made his exit to the outside, Adam Rose's entourage made their way onto the stage, followed by Adam Rose. JBL got a load of references in here, from Monty Python to "The Bearded Lady" from the Eurovision Song Contest.
Match 1: RVD defeated Jack Swagger (w/Zeb Colter) in about 30 seconds when Swagger was distracted by Adam Rose and RVD kicked him in the face and followed it up with the Five Star Frog Splash.
They aired a short video package on Paige.
Alicia Fox cut a promo about how Paige has managed to alienate the entire Divas' locker room in 6 weeks. Fox said as Paige doesn't fit in, she needs to get out. She then jumped Paige and assaulted her prior to the bell.
Match 2: Divas' Champion Paige defeated Alicia Fox in a non-title bout at 4:00. Following the match Alicia lost the plot and took the lid off the announce table and sprayed an energy drink all over the desk, JBL, and first few rows of the crowd. She then walked off wearing JBL's cowboy hat. This was all rather bizarre to say the least. The look on Bradshaw's face at the end of this was hilarious.
We got a video package recapping last week's clusterfuck of bad acting involving Glenn Jacobs, Brie Bella and Daniel Bryan.
WWE Champion Daniel Byan, all smiles but sans wife Brie, made his way out. Crowd chanted "YES!". Bryan thanked them and everyone watching on TV. Bryan said he knew this was always going to be an uphill battle, but the hill has turned out a little steeper than he thought it was going to be. Some in the crowd chanted "No!". 'So that's what it's like to be John Cena' Bryan joked. Bryan was receiving a funny old reaction from some fans. Then came the bombshell out of nowhere. Daniel Bryan, who was beginning to get emotional, revealed that he needs neck surgery, and needs it immediately. Crowd didn't really know how to react to this at first. Bryan continued that this has been his dream since he was a little kid, but the frustrating thing is there are some people who were real happy about the situation, namely Stephanie McMahon, Triple H, and Kane. Bryan said that they think his career is pretty much done. Crowd now loudly chanted "NO!". Bryan said there's a chance it could be...but it won't. Bryan ended by saying he had no idea when he'll be back, but he will be. Bryan led the crowd in "YES!".
We went back to the commentators, as they questioned what the future now holds for Daniel Bryan. JBL noted neck surgery ended his career. They said they would be following his surgery in the coming weeks on the WWE Network. We then got a video package on the John Cena/Wyatt feud.
John Cena came out in hideous Lime Green flogging more tat, followed by The Usos' and The Wyatt family.
Match 3: John Cena and The Uso Brothers defeated The Wyatt Family at 10:00 after John Cena planted Erik Rowan with the AA.
After the match, Bray took the microphone and thanked Cena for making him realise what he now must do. "Follow the buzzards".
Evolution came out, Batista and Randy both out of their suits & in their gear, and accepted The Shield's challenge for a rematch at Payback. As Triple H was talking in the ring running down each member of The Shield, Seth Rollins came from behind and tripped up Triple H. The other 2 entered and quickly dispatched all 3 members of Evolution to the outside. On the ramp Batista snatched the microphone from Triple H & said he'd had enough, demanding a match with Roman Reigns later tonight, before storming off.
Brie Bella (all smiles despite her husband's career having collapsed moments earlier), Cameron, Naomi & the red headed one were on the outside holding number cards to apparently score the moves during the upcoming match. They aired footage of Natalya, who is now a terrible painter on Total Divas, giving Nikki a crappy painting of John Cena and her embracing.
Match 4: Nikki Bella pinned Natalya in a horrible match devoid of crowd heat. The commentators spent most of the match mocking the women on the outside for failing to hold the score cards up. After the match Natalya got into a shoving match with the "cast" of Total Divas on the outside. This was arse backwards as the crowd ultimately felt sympathetic for Natalya right at the end and cheered for her instead.
Ryback and Curtis Axel flipped a coin - which they keep in their beanie hats oddly enough - to decide who would wrestle. Commentators debated as to whether the correct side of the coin was the winner or the loser. Surely whoever won, we ultimately lost.
Match 5: United States Champion Sheamus tapped out Curtis Axel with the Texas Cloverleaf in a non-title affair. Ryback then immediately attacked Sheamus after the bell. This led directly into an impromptu match with Ryback.
Match 6: Sheamus pinned Ryback with the Brogue Kick.
Sheamus vs. Cesaro made for Main Event Live tomorrow.
"Principal Owner" Stephanie McMahon walked on down to the ring to close out Hour number 2.
Stephanie said Bryan told his story earlier; that since SummerSlam he has overcome all adversity, but at the end of the day Bryan now has to undergo neck surgery. All that proves is one thing: Bryan is simply not an A+ player. His body just couldn't keep up. Stephanie said Bryan had the heart of a champion but unfortunately he just wasn't able to pull through for the fans. Stephanie requested Daniel Bryan come down to the ring as she had something she needed to say face-to-face. Instead of Bryan however Stephanie was greeted by Kane dragging out Bryan's limp and lifeless body onto the stage. Stephanie just stood there in the ring aghast. Bryan had a ripped shirt and bruising on his forehead. The EMTs came out, followed by Brie, and they carted him off backstage on a stretcher. Again. Stephanie looked on concerned.
Back from break, Bryan was being loaded into the ambulance. Stephanie apologised profusely. Brie shoved Stephanie and screamed "STAY AWAY!". She left with her husband in the meat wagon, leaving Stephanie just standing there in the parking garage.
Fandango and Summer Rae snogging on Total Divas. Fandango and Layla snogging on SmackDown.
Match 7: Dolph Ziggler pinned Fandango with the ZigZag off an accidental distraction by Layla, who somehow managed to get her foot trapped in the ring curtain.
After the match it looked like Fandango was going to dump Layla as well but he ended up proclaiming his love for her instead. They then played tonsil hockey with each other in the ring. JBL was outraged - his Mum watches this show, you know - & demanded the cameras cut to break.
Hacksaw Jim Duggan, 2x4 in hand, made a surprise appearance. He said he was sure everyone in the crowd are watching Legends House on the WWE Network. Before we could even hear the inevitable silence from the crowd Lana interrupted. She said just like England the US empire has crumbled and is now the laughing stock of the world. She said China now has the biggest economy. Putin went up on the Titan Tron. Hacksaw led the crowd in "USA! USA!" chants. She said the crowd continue to prove their country's inferiority. She then introduced Rusev. Lana demanded "Mr Doogan" beg. He didn't. Just as Rusev was about to waste Doogan, Big E ran down to make the save...but was instantly taken out to the floor. Hacksaw went over to him and led the few people that could still be bothered to chant "USA!".
They recapped The Shield beating up Evolution from the top of the show.
Damien Sandow, no longer wearing the superhero attire, came out & cut a short promo. I'll be honest with you, I wasn't really paying much attention by this stage of the broadcast. Sandow was cut off by Goldust and Cody Rhodes' theme music.
Match 8: Cody Rhodes (w/Goldust) pinned Damien Sandow with the Disaster Kick. The most interesting thing about this match was trying to figure out who cared less - the crowd or the commentators, who were off in their own little world again.
BOLIEVE. Please leave. DAMMIT LEAVE.
Bryan's announcement from earlier in the night & ensuing destruction at the hands of the Demon seed. Oh no wait that was Shane...
Bray Wyatt interrupted on the Tron. He said John Cena's boundless narcissism keeps leading him back to him. He asked when will all this end (boy, you're telling me). John likes to say that he will never give up and he will be the last one standing. Bray said he likes that very much and therefore would like to put that theory to the test at Payback. Bray appeared to be challenging Cena to a Last Man Standing match here. But then he also ended by saying "Burn", so they could be going Inferno.
John Cena will answer Bray's challenge on SmackDown.
Main Event: In an average match, greeted to an alarming amount of apathy from the crowd, Roman Reigns (w/The Shield) vs. Batista (w/Evolution) ended in Disqualification when everyone started brawling on the outside, with Triple H pulling Roman Reigns out of the ring and attempting to hit the pedigree on the floor. Rollins made the save with a flying forearm off the announce table.
Stephanie then appeared on the stage and sent a load of heel geeks to the ring to take out The Shield. After beating down The Shield, Triple H entered the ring with a steel chair, only to be greeted by a Spear. After another quick beating on Reigns, Rollins and Ambrose made the save with steel chairs of their own to finally a loud reaction from the crowd. Ryback, Fandango and Heath Slater - no really - were nailed with finishers on steel chairs. Evolution watched on irate in the aisle to take RAW off the air.
- Joined in 2008
- Location: Botswana
Quick WWE RAW Results 5/19/14 from London, England
Location: The O2; London, England
Commentators: Michael Cole, John "Bradshaw" Layfield, and Jerry "The King" Lawler
RAW opened with the Wyatt Family coming out. While Bray Wyatt was cutting a promo in the ring John Cena snuck up from behind and hit him with the Attitude Adjustment. Luke Harper vs John Cena will follow later tonight.
Match 1: Cesaro (w/Paul Heyman) defeated United States Champion Sheamus in a non-title match after Heyman distracted Sheamus & he was pinned off a German Suplex. Sheamus offered a handshake after the match but Cesaro refused.
A Beat The Clock Challenge was announced with the winner with the shortest time challenging Bad News Barrett for the Intercontinental Championship at Payback.
Match 2 - BEAT THE CLOCK: Big E pinned Ryback with the Big Ending in 5:02.
Fandango, Layla, R-Truth, Cameron & Naomi all came out. Before any match could get started Summer Rae interrupted by getting in the ring and trying to kiss Fandango. She then ended up brawling with Layla.
Daniel Bryan's music hit to a big ovation but it turned out to be Stephanie McMahon. Crowd broke out into a massive "CM Punk" chant. She reveals that she wants to strip Bryan of the WWE World Heavyweight Championship. However rather than do it tonight she wants him on next week's RAW to forfeit the belt himself as it's "best for business". Stephanie contemplated who is deserving of being awarded the title to close the segment.
Match 3: Rusev defeated Heath Slater (w/The Union Jacks).
Backstage segment with The Shield. Rollins hyped his match with Batista later on. Roman Reigns showed off the scar above his eye.
Match 4 - BEAT THE CLOCK: Rob Van Dam beat Alberto Del Rio with 15 seconds to spare.
Backstage interview involving 'comedy' with Renee Young, John Cena and The Usos.
Triple H was revealed as the Special Guest Ring Announcer for the next match; Randy Orton the Special Guest Time Keeper. How very Over The Edge 98. Rollins then came out and Dean Ambrose alongside Roman Reigns inserted themselves on commentary.
Match 5: Seth Rollins vs. Batista ended in Disqualification when a big brawl broke out & Triple H decked Rollins.
Match 6: Alicia Fox defeated Paige in a non-title match because you beat the home town hero in their home town.
Match 7 - BEAT THE CLOCK: Mark Henry vs. Dolph Ziggler went to a draw just as Ziggler was about to get the win. RVD came out to celebrate being the new Number 1 contender but Bad News Barrett attacked him from behind & laid him out. Barrett cut a promo on RVD.
Renee Young brought out Adam Rose and his entourage to the ring. They partied but were interrupted by Zeb Colter and Jack Swagger. Zeb cut a promo and wants Rose to face Swagger. Fans chant "you're a lemon" at Zeb and Swagger.
Main Event: John Cena defeated Luke Harper by Disqualification when Bray Wyatt interfered and attacked Cena. Bray laid out Cena on the stage with Sister Abigail. Harper then counted to 10.
- Joined in 2008
- Location: Botswana
WWE RAW Results 26th May 2014 wrote:
Location: Knoxville, Tennessee
Commentators: Michael "Yes, sir" Cole, Jerry "The King" Lawler, and John "Bradshaw" Layfield
After a 1 week hiatus RAW returned to LIVE programming with Stephanie McMahon and Triple H making their way out. Stephanie welcomed us to an "historic" RAW, which was greeted by boos. She said that she feels good about tonight as it was all about choices. Daniel Bryan has a choice on whether he will do the right thing and surrender the WWE World Championship. Crowd chanted "Yes!", which sounded like the crowd wanted Bryan to surrender the belt. Stephanie latched straight onto this fact. Stephanie said that they did not want to be right about this but ultimately while Daniel Bryan's heart and mind is in it, his body is a B+. Crowd now began chanting "No!". Triple H took the microphone & said that every generation has performers who rise to the top and become Superstars, while some just burn out & are a flash in the pan like Daniel Bryan. Then there are those who become Legends who stand the test of time; who remain dominant because of their ability to adapt. Those who cannot, like Daniel Bryan, perish. Those who adapt, live in our hearts forever, & that is Evolution. Triple H then announced a Contract Signing between The Shield and Evolution for later tonight. The Shield would therefore have a choice: they can either adapt & not show up at Payback on Sunday & go on to become Legends in the future. Or they can sign the contract & perish. Stephanie requested RAW General Manager come out to the ring. A nervous Brad got into the ring. Triple H said that during the Seth Rollins vs. Batista match last week he made it clear that no one was allowed at ringside outside of an "official" capacity, so why was it The Shield ended up on commentary. Brad responded by saying that he had no choice, as they forced his hand. Stephanie said that she had heard what happened. While Brad felt like he did not have a choice, they don’t have a choice either. This brought out Kane, which the cameras foreshadowed by 2 seconds. Maddox begged but instead walked straight into a right hand by Triple H. Kane then goozled & planted him with a chokeslam. Maddox was then dropped with an old-school looking - ie. slightly sloppy - Tombstone Piledriver. The pyro went off on the posts. Stephanie requested however they cut Kane's music and bring up the lights as she hadn't managed to finish their conversation. She revealed that Brad was now FIRED. EMTs piled into the ring to cart off Brad Maddox.
BOLIEVE vignette, with his RAW début still to come later tonight.
They announced BadNewsBarrett will face RVD at Payback, meanwhile Cesaro will face Sheamus.
#BNB made his way onto the stage & said today was officially the 1st day of summer. You know what's coming by now. "I'm afraid I've got some bad news". Barrett said that summer is the time we all dig out our swim suits, however it's also when we find our stomachs have expanded and they now sag over the waist band. Barrett continued that RVD's Indian summer is now well and truly over as come Payback he'll still be leaving as Intercontinental champion. Barrett inserted himself on commentary.
Match 1: Cesaro (w/Paul Heyman) defeated RVD off a distraction from Barrett with a German Suplex. During the match Wade Barrett was levelled with a Thrust Kick to the face on the outside. After the match Sheamus ran down and promptly nailed Cesaro with a Brogue Kick, much to the shock of Heyman.
Match 2: Eva Marie (w/Nikki Bella) rolled up Summer Rae when Layla and Fandango came out on stage and started kissing, causing the 2nd straight distraction finish of the evening.
Randy Orton and Batista were in the RAW office when Cody Rhodes and Goldust walked in. They were angry that they haven't been booked on the show again. Randy reminded Cody that he was the one who beat him and then got him fired in the same night. Cody then reminded them both they beat The Shield to get their jobs back, while Evolution lost at Extreme Rules. Cody called Batista and Orton a "Skinny Jeans Sellout" and "RK-Blows". Triple H finally walked in & said if the Rhodes' want a match then they can have Evolution later tonight. As they left Triple H told his chums there were going to be added surprises...
Memorial Day Quote from John F. Kennedy to what I initially thought was the theme to Jurassic Park...
Match 3: El Torito pinned Drew "sponsored by Mr Kennedy's spray tan" McIntyre (w/3MB) off the 3RD distraction finish. We're 3 for 3. 3MB and Matadores started fighting on the outside, allowing Torito to trip up Drew on the top turnbuckle. After the match 3MB all surrounded El Torito & pulled his tail off. Torito then held his buttocks & sold it like he was in agony. Or maybe it was supposed to be humiliation. What a way to close out the 1st hour...
Back from commercial, we were in the doctors room. El Torito was in severe pain. The trainer said he wasn't a vet & didn't know how to reattach the tail. Matadores freaked out.
The Wyatt Family made their way out.
Bray started singing "He's got the whole wide world in his hands". He said that never, ever, have those words been more true than they are right now. Bray said he truly has the whole world in his hands; and that the world has come to lean on him, and they do so because deep down they know that he only wants what is best. Sometimes that path isn't the easiest, & sacrifices need to be made. Bray continued that we go to work and sulk and suffer while someone else tells us how to act. All of that is pointless, as the poison has already swept in. The only way to cure a snake is with the right antidote. Bray asked the crowd if he is the snake or the cure. He knows his role in the world: he is the necessary evil, while John Cena is the enemy to us all. Crowd gave a mixed response. Bray said we shouldn't worry as at Payback he will be the Last Man Standing. Bray questioned why Cena should be the only man punished. Crowd then broke out into a "Cena" chant. Bray said while Cena is the king, he wants a word with another: Mr Jerry Lawler. Bray asked Lawler to get in the ring. He refused. Luke and Erik left the ring & went to the announce table, surrounding Lawler. Bray told JBL to stay in his seat. After some hesitation, John Layfield finally had enough and lept to Lawler's defence but was quickly taken out with a Clothesline from Hell from Luke Harper. Lawler begrudgingly got up & sat down in a chair positioned in the ring. Bray asked if Lawler and John Cena are friends & how Lawler has helped John achieve many of his goals by feeding the audience crap about how great a man John Cena is. Bray said however Lawler had never once questioned Cena's morality. Lawler was asked if he thought he was going to get away with being a liar. Bray apologised for what he was about to do. The Wyatt family grabbed Lawler. John Cena FINALLY sprinted to the ring to make the save. The Wyatt Family were too much for him to overcome. Luke and Erik held onto Cena as Bray put a boot into Lawler's face in the corner. Bray grabbed Lawler & was about to hit Sister Abigail when The Uso's made the save. Cena quickly recovered & The Wyatt's were sent packing to the aisle. In the ring, Cena took the microphone and said enough was enough, Bray finally having stepped over the line. When Bray first got here, everyone was excited because he was different, intriguing, & charismatic. When he spoke, people listened. But now he thinks he's a God. Cena quoted Abraham Lincoln, by saying that if you want to test a man, you give him power. Well Bray has been given power and he has become sick & evil. Payback is not about winning or losing but about being the Last Man Standing. "Justice may be blind, but Payback is a bitch."
Match 4: Rusev (w/Lana) tapped out perennial loser Zack Ryder (w/Old Glory) with the Camel Clutch in a 1 minute squash. After the match Big E ran down and after a bit of back-and-forth managed to dispatch Rusev with a clothesline over the top. Big E then waved the stars and stripes as Rusev went bananas on the outside and the crowd chanted "USA! USA!".
Stephanie McMahon and Alberto Del Rio were shown miming in the lock room.
Another Memorial Day quote.
This is episode 1,096 of RAW in case you're interested.
Match 5: Randy Orton and Batista defeated Goldust and Cody Rhodes when Randy Orton pinned Cody Rhodes with 2 RKOs.
Justin Roberts then informed us that this was elimination rules, and the next bout was going to be a 2-1 Handicap No Hold Barred match.
Match 6: Randy Orton and Batista dismantled Goldust with an RKO and Batista Bomb.
JBL returned to the commentary desk.
Match 7: In a rematch from London, Bo Dallas pinned Sin Cara with the Stratusfaction Bo-Dog. Bo Dallas has a very jiggly stomach. Death.
After the match Bo thanked his bo-lievers. How this guy isn't coming out to a cover of "Don't Stop Believing" from Journey I don't know.
They announced The Usos will face Erik Rowan and Luke Harper tomorrow night on Main Event.
Stephanie McMahon made her way back out to the ring to open up the final hour. She said it's important they have an active WWE Champion. But before that announcement can be made on the title, Bryan needs to come out as it was now time. Daniel, smiling with comedy neck brace in tow, came out leading the crowd in chants of "YES! YES!". Stephanie said that while she could just strip Daniel of the WWE World Championship, that would make him a martyr & he's already popular enough. Daniel said becoming the Champion at WrestleMania XXX was the pay-off for years of hard work and sacrifice but alas Stephanie has a point. Bryan said the neck injury is worse than they originally thought - no thanks to a 'demon' Stephanie McMahon claims to have no control over. Bryan then called her a liar. Bryan said that there is no shame in handing over the title, healing up, & regaining the title down the road. Stephanie promised he would receive another Championship opportunity. Daniel said that while there is no shame in handing over the title as the fans deserve an awesome WWE Champion, Stephanie has attempted to put this on him. But it's not about him, rather all about her. She has wanted to strip him of the Championship ever since he beat her husband at WrestleMania XXX. Daniel said that it would negate everything he fought for if he hands over the title & throw the crowd's support back in their face. Therefore he is going to tell her a word that she is not used to hearing. "NO!". He then repeatedly shouted it in her face. Stephanie replied that she was afraid his ego would get the better of him, or that his injury messed with his brain. Stephanie aired a video on the Tron from 2 weeks ago of Brie Bella shoving her outside the ambulance. Stephanie told Bryan that you cannot put your hands on the boss. Stephanie then revealed she was going to give Daniel one more chance to do the right thing. At Payback on Sunday Daniel will have to decide whether to surrender the WWE Championship or watch as Brie is fired.
Match 8: Emma rolled up Alicia Fox.
After the match Alicia Fox went crazy again & beat up some pale white dude, before giving him a wedgie & tearing his briefs. She then poured orange soda all over her tits, kissed the pale guy she'd just beaten up & apologised to him. Every week this comes across as the most legitimate & least scripted thing on the broadcast.
They announced that on the WWE Payback Kickoff, El Torito will face Hornswoggle in a Mask vs. Hair match.
Match 9: In his RAW début, Adam Rose (w/The Rose Buds) pinned 'Davey Crocket' "King of the Wild frontier" (Damien Sandow) with the Party Foul. Jack Swagger & Zeb Colter came out with a man in a lemon costume and attempted a distraction but it didn't work. Swagger and Rose got into it after the match with Adam Rose getting the best of the altercation, sending Swagger to the outside. Rose then partied with the Rose Buds.
They announced Sheamus will face Wade Barrett in a non-title Champions vs. Champions match on Friday.
Main Event: In another SmackDown rematch of a rematch of a rematch of a rematch of a rematch (look, now long you got...) United States Champion Sheamus pinned Alberto Del Rio in a non-title outing with the Brogue Kick. During the closing moments Sheamus sold a head injury/concussion.
After the match Paul Heyman appeared at the time keepers area and cut a promo, allowing Cesaro to jump Sheamus from behind & begin an assault on his head. Referee's attempted to pull Cesaro off to no avail. Sheamus was then planted with the Neutraliser. Heyman informed Cesaro he now had the advantage for Sunday.
A table & chairs were all set up precisely at the top of the hour. Michael Cole was in the ring for the contract signing. The Shield came out first through the crowd. Roman Reigns proceeded to chuck all the hardware out of the ring, destroying a load of casters in the process. Evolution came out. After a load of verbals, both sides signed the contract. Dean Ambrose dropped the pen. Triple H dropped the pen. Roman Reigns took the microphone, which wasn't on properly to start with, and told Triple H to shut up & get in the ring. After teasing leaving, Evolution entered the ring & both sides go into a brawl. The Shield initially had the upper hand until Triple H got hold of his patented sledgehammer. The Shield was then destroyed. Even though this received a somewhat half-hearted "this is awesome" chant from the crowd, the reaction for this entire segment was extremely flat. On the outside Roman Reigns was Triple Power Bombed through the announce table. Triple H, sledgehammer in hand - along with his Evolution cohorts - stood tall to take RAW off the air. Sky abruptly lost the feed as they were showing a replay.
- Joined in 2008
- Location: Botswana
WWE RAW Results 6/2/14 wrote:
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry "The King" Lawler and John "Bradshaw" Layfield
24 hours removed from the surprisingly decent Payback event, WWE RAW opened with Evolution making their way to the ring. Triple H said that while The Shield may think they won last night and this is all over, it isn't. Triple H vowed it won't be over until The Shield are no more. Crowd started chanting for "CM Punk". Triple H was seemingly about to make another 6 man when Batista snatched the microphone. He told Hunter he's had enough of fighting The Shield, & now wants his one-on-one Championship match that was promised to him. A now even more agitated Triple H got another microphone and said there's a reason he's the leader of Evolution & the WWE; he has a plan. Batista responded that he didn't care about Triple H's "plan". HHH reminded Batista that Daniel Bryan is injured, so even if he wanted to, he wouldn't be able to give Batista what he wanted tonight anyway. Hunter then quipped "Even if I did, you'd probably choke on it anyway"...before regretting what he'd just said. Triple H apologised that things were just getting a little stressful right now, before asking Batista if he wanted to go down as the guy that couldn't beat The Shield. Hunter told Batista that when The Shield is destroyed, then Batista will get everything he was promised. But until that time nobody is getting anything. Batista replied "I understand...and I quit!". He then mockingly waved like the Queen and headed up the ramp. Triple H was left screaming for him to return to the ring, taking a shot that if his latest movie craps out he won't be accepted back to the WWE.
They announced Sheamus and RVD would team to face Cesaro and Bad News Barret next.
On the WWE App, Batista said he has been continually lied to, and all he's got since coming back is "crap". He then stormed off.
In an inset promo, Barrett said that last night he defeated RVD to retain the Intercontinental Championship. Everyone likes to see RVD's Frog Splash, but the Bad News is all he's going to be seeing tonight is stars at the hands of the Bullhammer elbow.
Paul Heyman inserted himself on commentary.
Match 1: RVD and United States Champion Sheamus defeated Cesaro and BadNewsBarrett after Cesaro and Paul Heyman left BNB on his own to eat a Brogue Kick and Five Star Frog Splash.
They announced The Usos will face Erick Rowan & Luke Harper later tonight in a non-title match.
Lance Stephenson (Damien Sandow) cut an NBA based promo on the crowd. A player from the NBA in the crowd was shown, unimpressed. 'Stephenson' said LeBron James was the greatest player in the history of the game. Crowd booed. He then said the Indiana Pacers are a losing team from a losing city. More booing, unsurprisingly. Sandow showed off his "mad skillz" on the ball, with humorously lame music playing in the background. Big Show came out, threw the ball into Sandow's crotch and Knocked him out. Show ended by slam dunking the ball, breaking the net & board in the process. NBA guy in the crowd politely applauded.
Bo Dallas cut another NBA themed promo.
Match 2: In a match that was scheduled for last night, Bo Dallas defeated Kofi Kingston with the BoDog Stratusfaction bulldog.
The commentators had a jolly good laugh at the crowd chanting "BO-ring". If this gets over it'll be a bloody miracle.
Sky or WWE having a lot of technical difficulties with the picture tonight.
Renee Young was outside Triple H's locker room attempting to get a comment on Batista's exit when Stephanie McMahon came out. She said Triple H was busy, but if Renee wanted a scoop then she was going out to the ring right now to address the World Title situation.
A sour-faced Stephanie made her way down to the ring. She said last night Bryan showed his true colours; a selfish little man who chose himself over his wife and all the fans because he wouldn't do what was right and simply surrender the belt. Stephanie continued that Bryan stood impitently by while his wife fell by the sword. Brie should have been fired when she put her hands on her a few weeks ago, but instead Brie got another chance, yet all she received in return was a slap in the face.
Crowd cheered. Stephanie told them she could deal with it. She then revealed that at Money in the Bank next month - if Daniel Bryan can compete - he will defend the WWE Championship against Kane in a Stretcher Match. If however Daniel Bryan is still unable to go, the belt will be hung above the ring in the MITB ladder match for the first time ever. John Cena decided to interrupt. Stephanie noted the people seem to like him as much as they do her. She then congratulated him on the win last night. John replied that we probably haven't seen the last of Bray. John said that Stephanie has a tough job and has to make some tough choices. The WWE Universe deserves to see a fighting champion, and no one person is bigger than that title. He called Steph a spoiled egomaniac. Stephanie mocked the crowd 'oh, you cheer that'. Cena noted he has had 4 surgeries that have taken him out of action, Triple H "the showcase of what a WWE Champion should be" has had surgeries that have taken him out of action, and even Stephanie herself has had...surgeries. Stephanie quickly fired back "that's put me IN action, but that's another story...". Cena returned "we'll lock that up in a chest somewhere don't worry about it." Cena said he gets it that Steph does not like Bryan and she does not want him as WWE Champion, but Bryan is good, really good. Cena said Bryan is afraid to give up the title because he thinks Stephanie will never give him another shot at the belt. Steph told Cena that you can't live in fear, and she's simply trying to do the best thing for business. Daniel Bryan hasn't been able to defend the championship in over 30 days. Why can't anyone understand that? Cena said as an employee to a boss, he was going to give her a job evaluation from 1 to 10. And he gives her a 0. "Zero means you suck". Crowd chanted "You suck". "Quite frankly I don't care what they grade me". Stephanie said she was going to give Cena an opportunity tonight, despite being beat up, to show how tough he really is against Kane. "Payback's a bitch John, but then so am I". Kane's pyro went off on the stage to signal his arrival.
Match 3: John Cena defeated Kane by Disqualification in a horrible, albeit brief, encounter when Kane refused to stop beating up Cena in the corner. After the match Kane attempted to Tombstone Cena on the steel steps but Cena reversed and sent Kane into the ring post. John then picked up the stairs and threw them at Kane. Before anything else could happen a load of referee's ran down and sent Cena up the ramp. Kane sat up and proceeded to go crazy on the outside, smashing up furniture.
Renee Young caught up with Randy Orton backstage. He said things had got a little heated earlier and Batista chose to take his ball and go home. Randy said he and Triple H had a little chat and they're on the same page. In fact Triple H has granted him a match tonight...against Roman Reigns.
Heath Slater came out with 3MB. He said that while Los Matadores think they shaved Hornwoggle bald, they're wrong. After using a lot of Miracle Grow (yes, as in the fertiliser) his hair has already grown back. Hornswoggle then came out wearing an afro wig.
Match 4: Los Matadores defeated 3MB when Heath Slater was distracted by El Torito pulling Hornswoggle's afro off and rolled up.
Match 5: In a complete nothing match Alicia Fox and Aksana defeated Nikki Bella after Alicia nailed an Axe Kick. They then continued beating up Nikki afterwards.
Wyatt promo. Bray was absent, with just an empty rocking chair. Luke Harper said The Usos will pay for their atrocities.
Zeb Colter in the ring cut a promo on Adam Rose, saying he should be deported, along with all his Woodstock hippies.
Match 6: Adam Rose pinned Jack Swagger (w/Zeb Colter) using the Party Foul facebuster.
Byron Saxton interviewed The Uso's in their locker room. They're now channelling The Rock, have you noticed...
Match 7: Luke Harper and Erik Rowan (w/Rocking Chair) defeated Tag Team Champions The Uso Brothers in a non-title match. This had its moment but the crowd sat on their hands for the majority of this drawn out bout.
BadNewsBarret vs. Rob Van Dam for the Intercontinental Championship was announced for tomorrow night's WWE Main Event.
Match 8 - MONEY IN THE BANK QUALIFIER: Alberto Del Rio tapped out Dolph Ziggler with the Cross Arm Breaker.
Goldust was shown talking with his brother backstage. The commentators informed us Cody had hand-picked Goldust's new tag partner.
Match 9: Curtis Axel and Ryback beat Goldust and Sin Cara. Cody looked on from his locker room. If there are blind people watching this you could probably convince them that this show is now only taking place in front of 10 fans, such is the lack of heat.
As this strawberry floating diabolically boring 3rd hour continues - no, seriously, this isn't even funny - Lana came out for another anti-US rant. About half the crowd chanted "USA! USA!". She told them to shut up. So about 25% of those actually bothering to chant did. An image of Edward Snowden, followed by Putin, was put up on the TitanTron. Rusev came out for the Hero of the Russian Federation ceremony. Red carpet. Russian diplomats. Rusev got onto a box. Crowd attempted another "USA! USA!" chant. Failed. AGAIN. It's 3:50. Just give us the main event you gooseberry fools. This was followed up by the most half hearted "What" chant in history...and 1 fan shouting "This is awful". "What" chant immediately returned, louder as Rusev began to speak, having just been awarded a Gold star medal. We then got to listen to the Russian National Anthem, as confetti fell from the ceiling. The commentators meanwhile were too busy laughing at their own stuff again. Well at least we're all being apathetic together, eh.
There was a great advert for Mahogany on Sky Arts, in which some devil children trampled on some cardboard.
Bray Wyatt returns on Friday. Who notified the commentators and the graphics department of this remained a mystery.
We got the 400th replay of Batista quitting. It's 4am. Why for the love of GOD ALMIGHTY is 3 hours, 75% of it filled with positively jack gooseberry fool, not long enough?
The Shield asked how they looked, as they feel great. Last night they faced their biggest challenge, but when the napalm had settled they achieved what they set out to without a single casualty. Triple H said you need to adapt or perish, well The Shield adapted & Evolution perished. Silence from the crowd. In the end Evolution were just 3 strangers standing in a corner, whereas The Shield are brothers.
Triple H, along with his trusty sledgehammer, came out alongside Randy Orton. Triple H said that what he does better than anybody is adapt. Last night was Plan A...while tonight is Plan B. 'There is always a Plan B'. With Dean Ambrose and Roman Reigns staring at Orton and Hunter in the aisle, Seth Rollins nailed Reigns with a steel chair from behind. Dean Ambrose just stood there, stunned at what he had just seen. Rollins than destroyed both men with the steel chair, also destroying the chair in the process. Rollins then left the ring to a loud chant of "You sold out", swapping places with Randy Orton. The Brock Lesnar guy in the front row was APPALLED. Orton then continued to assault Reigns with another chair, to no reaction from the crowd. A fan in the crowd asked "Who wrote this?". Orton unzipped Reigns' jacket...planting him with an RKO onto a chair. Outside of the "you sold out" chant - which the WWE noticeably turned up the volume on - this crowd were so burnt out by this point there was practically no reaction to anything. Hunter, Orton, and Rollins stood tall over Reigns and Ambrose. Triple put the sledgehammer onto Reigns' chest. With a smirk on his face, RAW went to black.
- Joined in 2008
- Location: Botswana
PostRe: The WWE RAW Report: "The E3 Edition from F4W"
by KK » Mon Jun 30, 2014 2:08 pm
WWE RAW 06/9/14 Results - F4Wonline.com wrote:
By Rob McCarron
Noteworthy: Vacant wins the WWE World Heavyweight Championship. Two qualify for the Money In The Bank championship ladder match. Seth Rollins gives his explanation for leaving The Shield. Triple H guarantees tonight is the last night of the Shield, but he was not accurate in that guarantee.
To begin, I'd like to half apologize for the recap of the Seth Rollins heel turn last week in this report. After watching the entire program, which was not very good, then getting the heel turn, which I felt was just too soon and a big disappointment, I was not too thrilled to write up a whole lot about it. I just gave the headline, and sulked about the ending of what has been the most consistently great act in WWE for the past two years. There has been nothing in WWE that has been nearly as entertaining as The Shield on a top level over the last two years, including Daniel Bryan. It was over. Out of nowhere. It was disappointing. Anyway, I've turned a bit on the heel turn as I thought that the Shield's days were basically numbered anyway, as there wasn't a whole lot to be done with them in the near future. This way, we get something that could still feature creative stuff for longer. Regardless, for those who came here to find out what occurred on Raw and were disappointed at what you read, I apologize. You'll get a better report on what happened on Raw this week and the weeks to come. That's just what this is: A detailed explanation on what happened on WWE Raw.
The Authority Makes an Announcement
The jovial authority of WWE, Triple H and Stephanie McMahon, came out as giddy as ever to make a blockbuster announcement. Stephanie cut to a video package featuring Dr. Joseph Maroon announcing that Daniel Bryan is unable to compete anytime this month. Trips and Steph continued with the B+ Player narrative, and said this isn't the Daniel Bryan fanclub but rather a business. Stephanie then stripped Daniel Bryan of the WWE World Heavyweight Championship. Vacant wins the big one, again. Stephanie then mocked Brie Bella for quitting for absolutely nothing, and Trips sarcastically got a shot in about her being a shrewd business woman. So, Money In The Bank's ladder match will be for the vacant title. Alberto Del Rio is the first entrant based on his win last week on Raw, even though Stephanie said it happened on Smackdown. Triple H announced Randy Orton as the second entrant, saying that he just deserves to be in it. After another video package of last week's Seth Rollins turn, Triple H announced Ambrose & Reigns vs The Wyatt Family in a 6-Man Tag. The Shield can find a partner, but Triple H said that might be difficult. So, looks like we may get someone new in the Shield, or just Cena as their partner.
The promo for USA's Royal Pains is highlighting future appearances by Bethenny Frankel and Kevin Eubanks. Oh wow, they went all out...
Money In The Bank Qualifier: Sheamus vs #BNB
Sheamus defeated Bad News Barrett via pinfall to enter the Money In The Bank ladder match for the two belts. They did a lot of nearfalls after big moves. Sheamus kicked out of a Wasteland and Winds of Change, while Barrett kicked out of White Noise. There was also a count out spot that got to 9, with Sheamus dumped out of the ring and hurriedly getting back just before the 10. Almost played like a PPV match, which is fine considering the stakes of this bout. The crowd was more pro-Barrett for this one, but got in to the whole match when the nearfalls to big moves began. Sheamus finally got the win with a Brogue Kick out of nowhere, retaining the Linear WWE Championship and gaining entrance to the WWE WHC MITB Ladder match. By the way, they should really just call it the WWE Championship again. Have two belts if you want, but let us shorten the name now, please.
On the tron, Luke Harper spoke about being discarded animals. Luke said he still gets urges from a deep, dark place. Bray appeared on screen, and said everyone gets urges. The secret is how you control them. He said the Shield couldn't control theirs. Tonight, the Shield will burn.
Rusev vs Zack Ryder
Rusev wins a squash. Lana called President Obama a sissy and a girly man before cutting to a clip of President Obama working out while being secretly recorded. She said Putin would crush the flaccid Obama. Rusev came out with the Russian flag and his gold star medal, and spoke a bit in English during his entrance promo. I'm still waiting for Rusev to show the intensity he demonstrated at NXT Takeover, as he didn't here. He won quick, finishing Ryder with the Accolade. Ryder got a few punches in, which is more offense than he should have gotten. After the win, a giant Russian flag was unveiled over the ring. They're going all out with this Russia vs USA thing. Hogan vs Rusev planned for the Summerfest?
RybAxel defeated Goldust & R-Truth. Goldust took the pinfall this time, as Axel rolled him up with a schoolboy. This was a quick tag match, which Cody watched backstage via television.
Backstage, Layla was bashing Minnesotans as uncultured. Summer snuck up behind Layla, poured milk over her, slammed her face into a table, then left the dancing queen sitting on the floor covered in milk.
The Cancer's Name is Seth Rollins
After break, in the ring, 3MB were dancing. Heath said the Shield were supposed to be out to talk, but 3MB doesn't talk. That cued Shield's music, bringing Dean and Roman down to the ring to beat up 3MB. Heath, the smart one of the group, was trying to escape when he was suddenly speared by Roman Reigns on the stage. The director missed that shot, though, so we didn't see it until a replay a few moments later. Dean, reclaiming their mic time, said the Shield would go down as one of the greatest groups in WWE history. They had a cancer, though, and that was Seth Rollins. Dean said he'd get the chance to bash Rollins' face in soon. While Dean was talking, they cut backstage to Rollins, IN A SUIT, watching on a monitor. Dean implored Seth to speak tonight and say his truth, and then the Shield would beat the hell out of him. Reigns said Rollins committed the sin, but Orton and Triple H are also the problem. Reigns singled out Orton, calling him the ass of the company. Looks like Reigns vs Orton and Rollins vs Ambrose short term. Reigns did say he'd have his own Game of Thrones, calling out Triple H once he gets done with Orton.
Michael Cole confirmed that Rollins would break his silence tonight on why he left Shield. Took them a week to come up with a viable reason, I suppose.
Fandango & Damien Sandow vs The Usos
Usos beat The Dancers in this quick tag battle. Damien Sandow wore a flesh colored body suit and did what JBL called an interpretive dance to the ring. The crowd cheered him, and loudly chanted "Let's Go Sandow!" This could have been the best thing Sandow has ever done in WWE. He still lost, though, of course. Right Face Painted Uso pinned Damien after the top rope splash.
The Seth Rollins interview will be conducted by Michael Cole, sit down style. CAN'T WAIT! Sit down style interviews always work best. Well, unless they end with the announcer burning in flames.
Bo Dallas defeated Xavier Woods with the running Bodog. Bo Dallas had a message for Daniel Bryan: To come back better than ever, you just have to BO-lieve!
Paul Heyman was standing in the ring as we came back from break. He did a long build up about his client, the next WWE Champion, wanting to finally have a victory party to celebrate the biggest victory of his career at WrestleMania. It was meant to intimate Lesnar, so Heyman brought out Cesaro and smiled as if it was a big swerve. Crowd chanted "We Want Lesnar" pretty lightly throughout the next match, which was...
Money In The Bank Qualifier: RVD vs Cesaro
Cesaro pinned RVD after a Neutralizer. Another longer match that was laid out as more than just your average Raw match. RVD is much slower these days, but the two had some creative ways of working RVD spots into Cesaro spots, such as the rolling thunder countered into a big European uppercut. Cesaro got the win, so he is your next entrant into the MITB match that currently consists of Cesaro, Sheamus, Randy Orton, and Alberto Del Rio.
Cole cut to a photo of Randy Orton relaxing, as he is on vacation tonight. So no Orton, and no Bryan tonight on the show.
Michael Cole sits down with Seth Rollins
Well, we all knew this day would come eventually. And sadly, it is here: Seth Rollins has new music, and it's awful. It's the type of music he used on the independent scene when he would mosh like crazy. Thankfully, no moshing yet on the main roster. I dare say it is worse than Cesaro's music. Of course, Rollins was dressed up, in a suit. Cole was going to ask him a question, but Seth cut him off, saying he didn't understand the whole controversy. He said his turn wasn't a big deal, but just best for business. His business, rather. Rollins said he created the Shield, so he has the right to destroy it. He called Dean Ambrose a lunatic, who would be face down in a ditch in less than a week if left alone. He called Roman the golden boy, with raw emotion who needs to be handled. He called them both nothing if it weren't for Seth Rollins. Dean and Roman were watching on a monitor backstage. Seth said he learned something from Evolution, and that was that you have to evolve and adapt. He didn't sell out, but he bought in. He bought in to the evolution of Seth Rollins. He turned this into him having guts to step out on his own, rather than him just turning his back on his friends. He ended a business relationship, that's all.
Once Rollins was done, out came the Shield to do what they said they would: Beat the hell out of Rollins. Before the Shield could get their hands on Rollins, the lights went out. Rowan and Luke were in the ring as the lights came back, and we had a 2 on 2 brawl. Rollins slowly got back in the ring to try and take advantage of the situation, but Roman got his hands on Seth briefly before the traitor again bailed the ring. Bray Wyatt then rushed in to again set the Shield at a disadvantage. That didn't last long as John Cena's music hit, and the top star ran in to even the odds. Cena and the Shield sent the Wyatts packing, and we had our answer as to who would team up with Shield later for the main event.
Seth Rollins vs Dolph Ziggler was announced for Main Event.
Paige defeated Alicia Fox with the modified scorpion cross lock, which now has a name: Paige's Tap Out (The PTO.) After the match, Aksana tried to help Alicia up. JBL was fearful at what might happen. Alicia smiled, then slapped Aksana. She was slapping Aksana like crazy. Alicia then went to the floor and stole a fan's popcorn and water. She proceeded to eat some, then dump the rest on Aksana. The crowd tonight didn't care about this at all, and a "boring" chant broke out. The whole segment went entirely too long, match included.
Jack Swagger defeated Santino with the gutwrench powerbomb. Zeb slapped Jack around to motivate him, so we're back to that.
Backstage, Cody Rhodes had good news for Goldust. Cody finally has the perfect tag partner for Goldust, and that person debuts next week.
Backstage, Stephanie was questioning why John Cena kept getting involved in her gooseberry fool. Triple H said tonight would, unquestionably, be the end of the Shield. Vickie Guerrero appeared, and wanted to celebrate that Bryan and Brad Maddox were both gone. Vickie was pouring some wine, then sneezed. Stephanie slapped her and told her to get out before she fires her again.
Kevin Hart guest hosts WWE Raw next week from Cleveland. Miz should be returning, too.
Sheamus vs Cesaro to battle in the Smackdown main event this Friday.
John Cena & Dean Ambrose & Roman Reigns vs The Wyatt Family
Roman Reigns pinned Luke Harper after a spear to get the clean victory for Shield and Cena. They got about 20 minutes, and it was your usual Shield 6 man. Of course, the ending sequence picked up the pace, and overall the crowd was very into it. Triple H and Seth Rollins were watching on a monitor backstage. That monitor was the big star tonight. After the victory, we went off air. Nothing really more to it. So, we will find out what is next in Triple H's plans to destroy Shield next week, I suppose.
Next week: Goldust gets a new tag partner. Will the Miz return!? Who else will qualify for Money In The Bank's ladder match? So much to look forward to, you guys!
http://www.f4wonline.com/more/more-top- ... -tv-report
- Joined in 2008
- Location: Botswana
WWE RAW Results 16th June 2014 wrote:
Location: Quicken Loans Arena; Cleveland, Ohio.
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry "The King" Lawler, and John "Bradshaw" Layfield
I know you secretly missed me. Monday Night RAW opened with all the WWE superstars on the stage for a "critical announcement" by The Authority. Stephanie McMahon and Triple H made their way out. "Welcome to Monday Night RAW" bellowed Stephanie. She said that she wanted to let everyone know that The Authority care and they know how disconcerting it is not having a WWE Champion. Hunter chimed in that the WWE superstars lay it all on the line for an opportunity to prove that they are the best, & to have the honour of being called Champion. Stephanie said Triple H was the greatest champion ever, to a chorus of boos from the Live crowd, so it was therefore disheartening for the roster that the company has been represented by a B+ player like Daniel Bryan. Crowd chanted "Yes!". Stephanie took that as the crowd agreeing with her. Triple H said that somebody standing on that stage may be the next WWE Champion. The Authority is all about opportunity. Stephanie asks who will join the five men already in the Money in the Bank match? Tonight they will decide the final participants. Stephanie announced a Battle Royal...however a few Superstars on that stage have failed to comply with authority & therefore would not be in the match: Dean Ambrose, Roman Reigns and John Cena. Unlike the other two, John Cena will still have the opportunity to enter the MITB match. Hunter said he knows how much Cena likes to help people; people like Daniel Bryan and The Shield. Hunter says that his wife had promised everyone there would be a particular type of match, but because Daniel Bryan cannot compete, that match was cancelled. They hate to lie to the WWE Universe (boos) therefore that match stipulation will happen tonight. John will get his opportunity to enter the Championship Ladder Match if he can defeat Kane tonight...in a Stretcher match. An Ambulance then reversed into the arena, with a stretcher wheeled to ringside. Kane's pyro appears to go off on the stage but we immediately crash to break.
A Special Olympics USA New Jersey sticker is on the ramp. Michael Cole wished everyone involved luck.
Match 1: Seth Rollins defeated Dolph Ziggler by Disqualification in a great competitive match when Dean Ambrose (who continues to bear a now uncanny resemblance to Brian Pillman) ran in and attacked Rollins just as he was about to get the pinfall following the curb stomp.
With Seth managing to make his escape up the aisle, Ambrose took a microphone and told Seth this won't be over till he gets his hands on him. He noted Rollins has a very punchable looking face, and that he doesn't do anything without Hunter's permission these days. Even so, how about he come back down to the ring and fight him like a man. Triple H interrupted on the TitanTron and, in a mock English accent, said he had some "bad news" for Ambrose. #BNB made his way out.
Match 2: In another entertaining bout, Intercontinental Champion Bad News Barrett defeated Dean Ambrose (now in jeans) in a non title outing via Count Out when Seth Rollins appeared on the announce table & Seth and Dean ended up brawling in the crowd. After the match, and while #BNB was celebrating his victory, Ambrose nailed him from behind and planted him with Dirty Deeds. Ambrose has new theme music. It's also generic production music type stuff, but much better than Seth's.
Backstage Vickie Guerrero was delivering coke cups (but apparently cold coffee) to The Authority when she bumped into Roman Reigns sitting on a crate. Roman asked when Vickie was going to tell them to shove the job up their arse. Roman was manipulating Vickie with complements. He reminded Vickie that she had forgotten to put sweetener in the drinks. As she went off to get some, Roman turned and put something in the drinks. As this is wrestling, we were presumably supposed to believe it was laxative? Vickie then sneezed all over the cups, shrugged, and walked off to deliver The Authority their spiked drinks.
The Wyatt Family came out. There was a ladder set up in the ring with the WWE Championships hanging above. Bray said we are nothing in this life without power. Power can be addicting; we need it and crave it. Power is the downfall of mankind as we know it. A powerfall man is to be respected but a weak man is less valuable than the dirt that stains his clothes. Bray said that power and influence is his game however; as long as he is in the WWE Universe, the World Title represents all the power he could ever need. At Money in the Bank, his 'brothers' are going to fight and destroy The Usos. Bray vowed that at MITB he will stand atop of the ladder and change the world as it is forever. Atop the ladder is the change we have all be praying for. Bray then started singing with the crowd. Sheamus interrupted. He asked didn't Bray know that it's bad luck to walk under a ladder, especially as he will be involved in the biggest MITB in history. He said maybe Bray should change the lyrics of the song to "shove my whole boot down your throat". Crowd were not impressed.
Match 3: Sheamus (w/The Usos, who came out halfway through to ward-off Luke and Erik) defeated Bray Wyatt by Disqualification when The Family got involved and attacked Sheamus, pulling him over the top to the outside. Sheamus sent Harper and Rowan to the floor with a ladder. The Usos set up the ladder against the ropes and then ran up it to hit Planchas on both Wyatt's. Sheamus then threw the ladder on both men. Erik appeared to be legitimately hurt, throwing a mini fit on the floor and clutching the side of his head.
Backstage Triple H and Stephanie were talking when Vickie walked in with their coffees. Triple H turned around and struck the coffee cup, dousing Vickie. Triple H then asked Vickie what the hell she thought she was doing, and ordered her to go get another one. Stephanie meanwhile drunk hers. Oh, you can see where this one is heading later tonight...
Renee Young interviewed Stephanie McMahon backstage. It wasn't long before Stephanie had to quickly scarper off. As she did so, Paul Heyman strolled in. He said that in chaos there is opportunity. At the PPV, for the first time, the champion will be determined by the ladder match itself. How would the WWE be if Bray Wyatt is the World Champion? Or Randy Orton, Alberto Del Rio or Sheamus? Only one man has a strategist in his corner. That is the same strategist who said that Brock Lesnar would end the Undertaker’s streak at WrestleMania. Paul says that Cesaro will become the World Champion. That is not a prediction, that is a spoiler.
Heath Slater, referenced on air as the "1 man band" by JBL, was in the ring when Lana came out with Rusev. Lana propaganda. Crowd chanted "USA". She told them to shut up & listen. USA is a nation founded by weaklings. American men are unworthy to be called men. Crowd chanted "What?". You know the whole routine by now. Rusev said resistance is futile. Heath Slater grabbed the microphone and said week after week they come out and talk about how good Russia is. Well if they like it so much why don't they go back there then.
Match 4: Rusev tapped out Heath Slater in about a minute. This really needs to progress now.
Backstage, Triple H was at the toilet door listening to Stephanie being sick. Vickie walked in. Triple asked what she put in the coffee. She said nothing. Hunter told Vickie she'd have to go in there and check on his wife. As Vickie stood at the door, Stephanie - off camera - projectile vomited twice all over her. Triple H then said he was taking Stephanie home, so Vickie was now in charge. He told her to go take a shower. With them out of the room, Vickie then screamed the building down.
Roman Reigns knocked on the RAW office door. He said that Vickie is already in hot water and Stephanie will probably fire her next week, but she can still stand up to The Authority and do something that is 'best for business' - that being putting him into the Battle Royal. She screamed "FINE. YOU'RE IN!" & slammed the door.
We got a film trailer for We Think Like A Man II. Renee Young then interviewed Kevin Hart backstage about the film. Adam Rose and the Rosebuds walked in. He said the new movie is fantastic but Kevin needs to think less like a man, more like a Rosebud. Hart said no. Don't be a lemon...be a Rosebud was the response to that. Rose and company then danced off. Renee wished Kevin luck on commentary. Hart unassuredly said it'll be alright. He then found himself humming Adam Rose's theme music as he walked off.
"One of the funniest men in the world" Kevin "Oh my goodness" Hart came out for comms. He's LUDICROUSLY small.
Match 5: Adam Rose and Summer Rae defeated Fandango and Layla in a quick match after Rose used the Party Foul on Fandango for the pin. Layla was chased off to the back by Summer Rae.
After the match Kevin danced away with Rose & got carried away with the Rosebuds. This man can only be 4,9ft.
They announced Sheamus and The Usos vs. The Wyatt Family for tomorrow night on WWE Main Event.
Match 6: Roman Reigns won the Battle Royal and qualifies for the Money in the Bank WWE Championship Ladder match. Reigns still comes through the crowd and has retained The Shield's theme music. Finish saw Reigns facing off against Rusev. Massive "USA" chant from the crowd. Rusev was nailed with the Superman Punch while he was on the apron.
Renee Young interviewed John Cena backstage. "We just saw the impossible become possible". So ensued some 'comedy' I can't be bothered to recap.
Match 7: WWE Divas' Champion Paige tapped out Cameron (w/Naomi) in a non-title outing. Paige received barely any reaction from what has been one of the best RAW crowds in weeks. She needs a storyline because apart from her Sheamus skin there's not a lot to say about her.
Byron Saxton interviewed Goldust in his locker room. Goldust said he's met his new partner tonight and he's "Super Galactic".
Match 8: Goldust and Stardust (Cody Rhodes in Goldust garb...but with a few stars) defeated Ryback and Curtis Axel in a quick match. Crowd shat all over this by giving as close to a mute reaction as you can get without it actually being, well, mute.
Special Olympics trail.
Roman Reigns vs. Alberto Del Rio was announced for SmackDown.
Main Event: John Cena beat Kane in a Stretcher match to gain entry into the Money In The Bank match. Randy Orton and Seth Rollins interfered and attacked John Cena but Dean Ambrose made the save. He then received a Chokeslam for his efforts. John Cena was able to capitalise, hitting an AA to Kane onto the stretcher and wheeling him across the yellow line on the stage. Cena celebrated to take RAW off the air!
- Joined in 2008
- Location: Botswana
WWE RAW Results 23rd June 2014 wrote:
Location: Verizon Center; Washington D.C
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry "The King" Lawler, and John "Bradshaw" Layfield
Stephanie McMahon came out to open the go-home edition, the 1,100th episode no less, of Monday Night RAW before Money in the Bank. There was a load of ladders set up on the stage and around ringside. Crowd booed, as Stephanie sarcastically asked whether that reception was for her. She said, as one of the principal owners of a billion dollar business, the one thing she cannot stand is gross negligence. Stephanie demanded Vickie Guerrero come down to the ring to face the consequences of her actions last week. Vickie told Stephanie that it was so great to see that she is doing better, & that she always has the WWE's best intentions in mind. Stumbling, Vickie said that it was Roman Reigns which put whatever it was into Stephanie's coffee. Stephanie responded by saying that Roman was Vickie's biggest mistake to date. Vickie was given one simple instruction last week: not to let Roman Reigns into the Battle Royal. Instead, not only did Roman compete in the Battle Royal, he won. Now Reigns is competing for the WWE Championship at the Money in the Bank, with a 1 in 7 chance of being crowned champion. That is all on Vickie. Vickie promised it would never happen again. Stephanie said damn right it wouldn't happen again. For 9 years, Vickie has been riding on the coattails of her dead husband Eddie Guerrero. The WWE felt pity for her; and as they obviously couldn't make her a Diva, they made her a General Manager...alas she couldn’t even do that right. Just as Stephanie was about to fire her, Vickie said she'd do anything to keep her job, even if it meant begging. Crowd chanted "NO!", to which Stephanie replied that she would love to see Vickie beg. She told Vickie to get on her knees & berated her to 'beg more'. Stephanie said she was pathetic, but despite Vickie being a "cockroach" she was going to give her two options: either Vickie can be fired or continue to be the General Manager of SmackDown...on the condition she can win her match tonight. Her opponent? None over than Stephanie McMahon herself. Vickie replied that there is one name people respect more than "McMahon", and that is "Guerrero". Eddie taught her how to lie, cheat, and steal, so she accepts. Vickie screamed “EXCUSE ME” right into the face of Steph and stormed out of the ring.
They revealed #BadNewsBarrett would defend the Intercontinental Championship against Dolph Ziggler; and in a rematch from SmackDown, Randy Orton, Cesaro, Bray Wyatt and Alberto Del Rio would face John Cena, Sheamus and Roman Reigns in a 4 on 3 Handicap match later tonight.
The announced The Uso brothers will defend their Tag Team Championships against The Wyatt Family on the Money In The Bank Pre-show.
The Wyatt Family have new entrance music: an organ playing 'Got the whole world in his hands'.
Match 1: Luke Harper (w/Erik Rowan) pinned Jimmy Uso (w/Jey Uso) with the Clothesline from Hell in 2:00.
After the match, Jey got on the microphone and asked Erik where he thought he was going. As both Wyatt's headed back to the ring, Jey launched himself over the top rope onto the both of them.
Match 2: In another quick outing, Jey Uso pinned Erik Rowan with a Top Rope Splash.
After the match, The Wyatt's destroyed The Uso's and posed with the titles. Bray appeared on the TitanTron and said he was so proud of both men. He then vowed victory and domination come Money in the Bank.
Michael Cole revealed Daniel Bryan will be on the Money in the Bank Pre-Show. Michael Cole is wearing one of Vince McMahon's outrageous jackets.
In a pre-tape, Rusev and Lana were shown standing outside the Capitol Building in Washington. Russia is amazing, America & its landmarks are pathetic. You know the stuff.
Divas' Champion Paige came out for commentary. She was then joined by Cameron. Despite coming out with Naomi, apparently Cameron & her no longer see eye-to-eye over something that nobody saw on Main Event. Don't ask me, the commentary was a strawberry floating shambles.
Match 3: Naomi pinned Alicia Fox. After the match Paige got on the apron & she shook hands with Naomi while holding up the belt.
Sheamus was in the trainers room taping his wrists. The camera panned back to reveal he was standing beside Roman Reigns. Sheamus asked if he was ready for a fight tonight, & he still remembers The Shield taking him out a while ago. Sheamus vowed to magically walk away as the WWE Champion on Sunday. "I don't believe in magic. I believe in Roman Reigns. And so should you," was Reigns' response to that, before walking out.
In the ring, Bo Dallas said Titus O'Neil fell off a horse on SmackDown. Dallas is sporting a black eye. JBL on commentary said he'd got hit with a Shuttlecock.
Match 4: Bo Dallas pinned Titus O'Neil in under a minute with the Bo-Dog. Not sure if you've noticed, but the matches this hour have been complete crap.
Bo Dallas said Titus needs to get back on the horse and Don't Stop Bo-lieving.
COO Triple H made his way out. He admired the ladders on the stage. Must be the long legs.
Hunter said it was funny how officials in this city are elected who have no idea what they're doing & make the country worse, yet he comes here and he's somehow the bad guy, despite doing what's Best for Business - which isn't a catchphrase, but is at the root of everything he does. Triple H said that there will not only be a WWE Championship Ladder match on Sunday, but there will be a traditional Money in the Bank match as well. Mild applause from the crowd. Triple H said that on WWE.com on Wednesday he revealed Seth Rollins as the first entrant (didn't Seth make the announcement on Main Event...on Tuesday?). Despite popular opinion stating otherwise, Triple H claimed he does not make decisions based on favouritism, but rather what's 'best for business'. He then revealed the entrants for the match as: Kofi Kingston, Jack Swagger, Dolph Ziggler (who he noted people don't think he appreciates the talent of), Rob Van Dam and, in a mock English accent, Bad News Barrett. Triple H said the man he thought would win the match would be Rob...Van...before he could finish, he broke out into laughter, stating there was no way he could actually say that with a straight face. Rather his man is a specialist, ring technician, and the future of WWE. Seth Rollins, sporting attire very similar to the Hunter Hearst Helmsley snob gimmick, came out. A few in the crowd told him he sold out. Seth couldn't believe the crowd hadn't moved on yet. If they love Ambrose and Roman Reigns as much as they make out, then everyone should be thanking him as he made them both a success. He created The Shield, therefore had every right to destroy them. This Sunday he alone will climb the ladder, grab the contract and become Money In the Bank. RVD interrupted. "Hi, guys". Seth said maybe he would take RVD more seriously if this were still 2005. RVD quipped that was obviously when he was asking Mum and Dad to stay up late to watch him. RVD reminded Hunter that he must totally remember when he crushed his trachea at the first Elimination Chamber. Crowd broke out into a "RVD" chant. RVD asked how about he beat Hunter's new golden boy right now. Triple H said "Great" & requested a referee get down to the ring.
Match 5: RVD vs. Seth Rollins ended in Disqualification when
Brian Pillmanran in and dismantled Seth all around ringside. Referee's managed to finally break it up, allowing Seth to scarper up the ramp. Dean Ambrose demanded a microphone, saying Triple H had better put him in the ladder match because he's going to show up at Boston, bash Rollins's head in, grab the briefcase, and walk right out of the building with it anyway. Ambrose said he was going to screw up their PPV.
Vickie Guerrero was shown warming up backstage.
Backstage in the RAW office, Seth Rollins was speaking to Triple H. Rollins said Dean Ambrose is going to screw him over anyway, therefore has has to be put in the match so he can be in control and know where he can always see him. Seth told Hunter he wants to see the look on Ambrose's face when he grabs the contract, crushing his dreams in the process. HHH said that if this blows up in his face, then it's all on Rollins. But if he wants him, he'd got him: Dean Ambrose is in the Money in the Bank match.
Bad News Barrett came out & cut a promo. He said that last week Dolph Ziggler garnered a fluke victory against him, and that caused Ziggler's ego to go even higher. Well he's got some bad news, as after he beats Ziggler tonight and then again on Sunday in the Money In the Bank, Ziggler will be forced to change his name. Just like Washington's racist, constantly losing NFL team.
Match 6: Bad News Barrett defeated Dolph Ziggler to retain the Intercontinental Championship in 11:00 with the Bullhammer Elbow in a great match.
Vickie Guerrero was shown heading towards the ring, with various superstars standing around juts looking at her. Renee Young turned up; Vickie said she was not asking for forgiveness, rather just a way of reclaiming some of her dignity back. Randy Orton butted in and said Vickie is going to get exactly what she deserves tonight, just as he will at MITB. Randy Oton said he'd like to say it's been nice knowing her, but they'd both know that would be a lie.
They announced Kofi Kingston, RVD, and Dolph Ziggler will face Seth Rollins, Jack Swagger, and Wade Barrett for tomorrow's WWE Main Event.
Coming out to Eddie Guerrero's old WWE theme music, Vickie made her way out to the ring.
Stephanie McMahon walked out, not dressed to compete. She told Vickie that her place wasn't in the ring, rather in the pool positioned next to the stage. It was obviously filled with chocolate, but I think it was supposed to be gooseberry fool. The first one into the pool loses the match. Stephanie then called for Layla, Rosa Mendes, and Alicia Fox to make their way to the ring & "get her". Vickie made her exit from the ring and tried to escape up the ramp but was blocked off by Stephanie. The Divas' picked up Vickie and was about to chuck her in the pool when Vickie managed to fight them all off, throwing them one by one into the pool. Stephanie nailed Vickie from behind with a knee & chucked her in. "YOU'RE FIRED". With Stephanie now busy singing "Nah, Nah, Nah, Nah...Goodbye" she managed to position herself where Vickie was in the prime spot to shove her in. Well...Stephanie ended up in the chocolate. A referee came out and attempted to help Stephanie from the swimming pool, but she ended up dragging him in too. Stephanie finally managed to get out, berating the crowd that she'll get every single one of them.
Goldust was interviewed in his locker room by Byron Saxton. The lights went down and Cody Rhodes walked in singing "wish upon a star". "Wow, now I'm the normal one" was Goldust's response to that.
Back in the arena, Zeb Colter asked everyone to stand up for "We The People". Kofi Kingston came out. He's got his pyro back.
Match 7: Jack Swagger (w/Zeb Colter) tapped out Kofi Kingston with the Patriot Ankle Lock. Get the feeling we've seen this match before?
Naomi vs. Paige for the Divas' Championship officially announced for Money In the Bank.
Renee Young interviewed Alberto Del Rio backstage. Vowed victory. Heyman and Cesaro strolled in. Heyman also vowed victory for his client. Del Rio asked if Cesaro ever talks for himself. Cesaro replied that he speaks 5 languages but none of them are loser.
Sheamus vs. Bray Wyatt for Friday's SmackDown.
Abraham Lincoln was in the ring. That was the sound of Damien Sandow's career going down the pan.
Match 8: Big E pinned "Honest" Abe with the Big Ending in 1:00.
Big E cut a really horrible grunt'n'groan promo on how great America is. Lana mercifully interrupted. Rusev then nailed Big E from behind and destroyed him, before finally putting E in the Camel Clutch. Crowd half heatedly chanted "USA".
Renee interviewed John Cena backstage. In the 1 minute he spoke, absolutely nothing of note was said.
Main Event: John Cena, Roman Reigns and Sheamus defeated Bray Wyatt (who still has his original music), Cesaro, Randy Orton and Alberto Del Rio after Sheamus nailed Cesaro with the Brogue Kick following a series of finishing manoeuvre's from various individuals.
Immediately following Sheamus' victory, Kane marched his way down to ringside and laid waste to all and sundry with Chokeslams. Triple H came out onto the stage. Standing beside Randy Orton he revealed the 8th entry into the WWE Championship match on Sunday...Kane. With the pyro exploding on the ring posts, Roman Reigns then appeared from out of nowhere and Speared Kane. Roman Reigns stared down Orton and Hunter on the stage to take RAW off the air.
- Joined in 2008
- Location: Botswana
WWE RAW Results June 30 2014 wrote:
Location: Hartford, Connecticut
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry "The King" Lawler, John "Bradshaw" Layfield
Less than 24 hours removed from a new champion being crowned at Money in the Bank, Monday Night RAW opened with The Authority making their way down to the ring. Crowd immediately started chanting "CM PUNK" at the top of their lungs. Stephanie and Triple H didn't acknowledge it and carried on as normal. Stephanie thanked the crowd for an "amazing homecoming" to the place where she was born: Hartford. Stephanie said they started MITB with Daniel Bryan, but unfortunately with the news that Daniel’s recovery will take longer than everyone had hoped. However they are in the business of making history, not living in the past, and they did that when Seth Rollins defeated 6 other competitors to win the briefcase and guarantee that he will become WWE World Champion. Hunter chimed in that Seth is the future of the WWE. Triple H said history was also made as "A+ player" John Cena became 15 time World Champion. Crowd weren't impressed and promptly booed. HHH introduced him, as Cena walked out with both titles draped around his neck. Cena started by saying that Daniel Bryan will be back and better than ever, and when he is he'll get an opportunity to regain the Championships that he never lost. Crowd chanted "YES!". Cena, now he'd got that out of the way, wondered what was on their minds. Stephanie asked how many of the crowd were gamers, to a mixed response, because to celebrate John Cena's 15th title victory, they are proud to reveal John Cena will be gracing the cover for WWE 2K15. After an unintentional delay, the cover exploded from the ceiling. It's sporting the WWE Network logo; the current scratch logo being scrapped completely by SummerSlam according to Stephanie last month. John just stood there looking nonplussed. He thanked Stephanie, and while it is an honour to be on the cover of WWE 2K15, something about this isn't right. The Authority are being too nice, way too soon. John put up a screen grab on the Tron from last night's Money in the Bank showing Stephanie and Hunter looking distraught at the sight of Cena winning the belts. Stephanie replied by saying that they were simply concerned about Randy Orton. John said they have Orton, Kane, and Rollins in their back pockets, and no matter what they do they will not control him, & 'The Champ Is Here'. Triple H mockingly told Cena to 'chill, homey'. Cena said if Hunter wants he'll drop the r's and kick his ass right now. HHH said they don't have a problem with Cena being on covers, making movies, and being a big Superstar, or even that he's the champion, just as long as he does it with some respect. Triple H said Cena can either do things the easy way, or the hard way (the old Vince McMahon speech given to Steve Austin). Cena chose the hard way. Triple H said he would have been disappointed if Cena had chosen anything else. They announced that at the next PPV, Battleground, John Cena will defend the title against Seth Rollins, Randy Orton and Kane in a Fatal Four Way. Triple H revealed that two of the people in that match will be John’s opponents tonight: Randy Orton and Kane. John's partner will be...Roman Reigns. Triple H Cena to enjoy his moment in the sun, as it goes by fast (they must be having a strawberry floating laugh with that line...). John said that if he manages to leave with the title at Battleground, he knows that he will have earned it. Cena, turning his focus on Stephanie, said it would be as bad as swimming in a pool of crap. John left the ring, but Hunter cut the music and said that if somehow John survives at Battleground there's always a Plan B. Seth Rollins’ then came out clutching his newly won briefcase.
They announced Sheamus and The Usos would team together to face The Wyatt Family later tonight.
20 minutes into the show and they're already hammering the WWE Network hard.
Match 1: Seth Rollins pinned Rob Van Dam with the Curb Stomp in front of a lively crowd at 12:00 in a very enjoyable opener.
After the match Renee Young interviewed Rollins in the ring. Ambrose interrupted on the TitanTron. Ambrose told Rollins that every time he thinks of cashing in he will be there, haunting him. He hasn't got a contract in the briefcase, rather it's loaded with TNT that was ready to blow up in his face.
Lana cut a promo. Crowd chanted "USA". She told the crowd to shut up. Russia is wonderful, America is a pile of gooseberry fool...you know the score. Rusev said something in Russian to "What?" chants. It's the same thing every bloody week. Zeb Colter came out with Jack Swagger. Colter said he was sick and tired of Rusev and Lana coming out week after week and slamming the US. Colter turned his attentions to "Lana, if that is your real name" & said what they're doing is taking advantage of freedom of speech, spouting their lies, but that also means he can say whatever he wants too. Colter said Rusev and Lana couldn't say the things they do in their own country. Colter said he thinks a "Real American" in Jack Swagger can stop Rusev, & a real American will come crashing down on their heads. Sounded more like a set-up for Hogan...Crowd started chanting "Let's go Swagger". Lana told Rusev to back down. As Lana left the ring, Rusev went against her demands & attempted to jump Swagger but was hit with a couple of arm drags. Rusev bailed, and ended up getting chastised on the outside by Lana. Swagger and Colter stood tall in the ring as the crowd bellowed once more in a loud "USA, USA" chant. This went down considerably better with the crowd than it had any right to.
Backstage, Sheamus and The Uso's were shown heading towards the ring.
Is it just me or is JBL beginning to get slightly irritating on commentary...
Match 2: The Wyatt Family defeated Tag Team Champions The Uso's and Sheamus when Luke Harper nailed Jey Uso with the Clothesline from Hell for the pin.
Nikki Bella was interviewed backstage by Tom Phillips. Nikki noted how her sister Brie was asked to leave the PPV last night, and how she didn't realise she was making a mistake allowing her backstage as a guest. Stephanie McMahon walked in and revealed Nikki & Brie have a match tonight against The Funkadacytls. Stephanie then remembered Brie doesn't work in the WWE any more, therefore Nikki would have to go it alone.
A black limo was shown pulling into the building, WCW Nitro style.
Bo Dallas came out & thanked the crowd. He asked the crowd to join him in 60 seconds of silence for 2 superstars unable to compete: Daniel Bryan and #BadNewsBarrett. Crowd were silent because they didn't give two gooseberry fools. Commentators did a load of Bo-ring jokes as Bo Dallas knelt in darkness on the stage for the full minute. We then got a recap of the Money in the Bank pre-show where Bo Dallas interrupted Daniel Bryan. Nikki Knockers then came out right passed him for her handicap match...
Match 3: Naomi and TheBomb.com defeated Nikki Bella when Naomi got the pin. After the match, The Funkadactyls got into a shoving match. TheBomb.com then stormed off.
The announcers revealed that Wade Barrett has suffered a separated shoulder & therefore will be out of action for a number of months. Michael Cole revealed the Intercontinental Championship is now vacant, with a new Champion to be decided in a Battle Royal at Battleground in 3 weeks.
Paul Heyman came out on the stage and cut a promo, stating Cesaro would be next Intercontinental Champion at Battleground.
Kofi Kingston cut an inset promo saying he will capture his 5th Intercontinental Championship in the Battle Royal.
Match 4: In what I think is the first time since WCW Nitro, Kofi Kingston defeated Cesaro (w/Paul Heyman) during the COMMERCIAL BREAK. After the match, Cesaro completely lost the plot and destroyed Kofi all over ringside and into the crowd. Kofi was thrown over the announce table, somehow taking out Michael Cole in the process. From what I could tell Cole just...fell off his chair. Cole was back 5 minutes later, tragically denying Renee Young her first opportunity to call the action on RAW.
Santino was backstage having a BBQ all by himself when Adam Rose turned up with his Rosebuds and they all plugged some American ice tea product.
Vincent Kennedy McMahondow came out (Sandow dressed as Vince McMahon). He looked the part, at least. He said he was entering himself into the Intercontinental Battle Royal. Stephanie turned up on the TitanTron absolutely livid at Sandow impersonating her Dad, so booked him against another Battleground Battle Royal participant. Out came a returning Great Khali.
Match 5: Great Khali pinned Vince McMahondow with a chop to the head in 10. As in seconds.
The limo door opened.
Jungle by Jamie N Commons is the official theme tune for Battleground.
The Miz came out right on the hour. For all of 10 seconds they made it look as if it was going to be The Rock. The gimmick here is that The Miz thinks he's a massive movie star. He asked the crowd if we missed him. Apparently lots of people were begging him to stay in Hollywood as he was better than the WWE. Miz said unlike Hollywood, we don't appreciate him as an A lister & he was back to prove us all wrong. Crowd gave him the "What" treatment. As Miz continued ranting with all the confidence of an emasculated sheep, pyro went off on the stage and none other than Chris Jericho - flashing jacket and all - returned to a big reaction. Miz screamed that Chris had just deprived the people of his moment to shine. Jericho then dropped him with the Codebreaker. Jericho grabbed a microphone and said that felt damn good. The lights then went out and upon coming back up, the Wyatt Family were in the ring. With the crowd breaking out into the 3rd "this is awesome" chant of the the night, Jericho was promptly wiped out & planted with Sister Abigail.
Ziggler vs Cesaro was announced for Main Event.
Match 6: Dolph Ziggler beat Fandango (w/Layla) when Summer Rae walked straight into the ring and snogged Dolph. Dolph then dove back in and snogged her back. Fandango looked on wondering what on earth Summer was doing, allowing Ziggler to plant him with the ZigZag from behind. Clearly having a better night of it than I am...
We got a recap of Vickie and Stephanie being covered in chocolate. Lawler wondered what it must have tasted like. Well if he was paying attention to WWE's YouTube page last week, it actually tasted very nice (bananas...apparently).
Match 7: Stardust and Goldust defeated Ryback and Curtis Axel.
WWE Divas' Champion Paige came out. She stated she is a woman of few words as she makes her actions do the talking. She knows there are a few people that think she isn't deserving of being a champion and should go back to NXT. In a surprise, and proving she isn't pregnant in the process, a very orange AJ Lee returned, skipping her way down to ringside. "CM PUNK" chants immediately rang out. AJ said that she simply wanted to come out and say that Paige is right; and while that isn’t easy to say, Paige did what no woman in almost a year could do. She proved her and everyone else wrong. AJ Lee, now positioning herself as a face, said she let success get to her head. She was the longest reigning Divas' Champion of all time, but she shouldn’t have rubbed it in everyone’s face, and Paige earlier this year gave her the slap she deserved. AJ said that she wanted to return the favour tonight & simply tell her "thank you" & "congratulations". Paige however wasn't having any of it, noting AJ was simply doing what she did to goad her into a championship match. Paige said nobody wants to see her defend her championship tonight anyway. AJ asked the crowd if they wanted to see a Championship match. Crowd said they did. Paige then completely out of the blue, agreed.
Match 8: AJ Lee defeated Paige at 1:00 with an inside cradle to recapture the WWE Divas' championship. AJ Lee celebrated as Paige sobbed away in the ring.
Sheamus' 4th July Championship Challenge on SmackDown.
Triple H positioned himself sat next to the commentators table.
Main Event: John Cena and Roman Reigns vs. Randy Orton and Kane ended in Disqualification when Reigns and Orton brawled to the back and Kane waffled Cena with the steel steps on the outside. Back in the ring, Kane dropped John Cena with a Tombstone piledriver. A trainer, followed by Triple H, both got in the ring to check on Cena. With Cena out of it, Triple H motioned to the back. Seth Rollins made his way down to the ring, briefcase in tow. With Kane and Triple H on the outside arguing with the reluctant referee to ring the bell and start the match, Dean Ambrose ran down and attacked Rollins. Both men brawled through the crowd, Rollins quickly scarpering out of the arena. As Kane was about to go to work on Cena with a steel chair, Roman Reigns returned and ran through Kane with a Spear. Briefcase in hand, Triple H and Roman Reigns stared each other down, the crowd erupting once again into a "This is awesome" chant...Triple H ultimately backed down, taking RAW off the air!
- Joined in 2008
- Location: Botswana
WWE RAW Results 7/7/14 wrote:
Location: Bell Center; Montreal Quebec, Canada
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry "The King" Lawler, and John "Bradshaw" Layfield
Monday Night RAW opened up with Roman Reigns making his entrance through the crowd. Reigns said that, unlike some people, when he comes to the ring he does so with a point. Roman noted that Triple H put him in the Fatal Four Way because he thinks it's 'best for business'; possibly Hunter thinks he can neutralise John Cena, or that Kane can neutralise him so Randy Orton can leave the WWE Champion. But he won't. Crowd started chanting something inaudible, which became a low level "Cena sucks". "When Roman Reigns is in the house, you damn right Cena sucks". Reigns vowed he will be the next WWE Champion. Kane's pyro then exploded on the stage, bringing out "the demon". As Kane just stood there, Roman asked whether Kane was standing in for The Authority tonight as he's Triple H’s lap dog. Or maybe he's just being Randy Orton's bitch, which drew a few "Ooooooh"s from the crowd. As Kane made his way down to the ring, he and Reigns both met in the aisle. With both men finally making it into the ring, referee's ran down in an attempt to break it up. Kane promptly planted one of the referees with a Chokeslam. With things continuing to get out of hand, agents - including Dean Malenko, Fit Finlay and Jamie Noble - ran down to the ring. Reigns shoved Noble aside and then destroyed Finlay with a Spear. Kane attempted to return, only to be on the receiving end of a Superman Punch.
They announced The Miz will take on Chris Jericho later tonight, in addition to John Cena vs. Seth Rollins. They teased Cena and Rollins could even morph into a championship match if Rollins decides to cash in (spoiler: he won't).
Match 1: In a non-title outing, Luke Harper and Erik Rowan defeated The Uso's when Luke Harper pinned Jey Uso off the Clothesline From Hell. After the match Jimmy was complaining to the referee that Jey wasn't the legal man.
The announcers plugged the 1 week free trial of the WWE Network.
In the RAW office, Randy Orton was telling Kane that had Roman Reigns done one more thing earlier he would have been out there like a shot. Orton told Kane that he knew he would have his back at Battleground. With mild unease in the air, "That's right Randy, one way or another the WWE Championship is coming back to The Authority" was Kane's reply to that. Seth Rollins walked in, promising to think twice about cashing in his Money in the Bank briefcase if either one of them wins on Sunday. As Rollins left, Orton told Kane that he was really beginning to "hate that kid". Kane replied with "not nearly as much as I'm beginning to hate you" before also walking off.
Per The Authority, they announced both Nikki Bella and Alicia Fox would compete with both arms tied behind their backs. Nikki's plastic knockers now seem even bigger. The match never got started as, once Nikki's arm was tied up, she was assaulted by Alicia prior to the bell. Crowd booed, with some shouting "boring". This went on for too long and stank the joint out. Alicia then did a Steve Austin and smashed two Red Bulls together, before pouring it over Nikki and the ring canvas.
Lana. Rusev. Putin. Promo. Mercifully, and very quickly, cut off by the arrival of RVD.
Match 2: Rusev (w/Lana) defeated Rob Van Dam with the Camel Clutch in the most competitive Rusev match yet. During the match, Zeb Colter cut an inset promo challenging Rusev to a match at Battleground against Jack Swagger.
Match 3: In a rematch from SmackDown (seriously, is there any point in watching that show?) Randy Orton pinned Dean Ambrose off the RKO at 18:00. There was a botch during the match with Dean Ambrose coming off the top rope and Orton failing to move or react, which led to an audible "you strawberry floated up" chant.
Renee Young interviewed WWE Champion John Cena backstage. Roman Reigns walked in. He wished Cena luck in his match later. Cena said he doesn't need luck. Roman responded by saying Cena is going to need it in the Fatal Four Way at Battleground against him.
Fandango came out for commentary. He announced he's in the Intercontinental Championship Battle Royal at Battleground.
Match 4: Alberto Del Rio pinned Zolph Ziggler with a kick to the head when Ziggler was distracted by Fandango dancing on the announce table. JBL was appalled that he was doing it in front of him.
Alberto Del Rio will challenge Sheamus for the US title tomorrow night on Main Event.
Backstage, Stardust and Goldust had some sort of homoerotic moment involving a wig.
We had some thoroughly bad acting between Layla and Fandango. Layla asked what Fandango's motivation was for being out there. Layla said that she wouldn't know what she would do if he still cared for Summer Rae. Fandango told her that no one will cut in on their dances. As they embraced, the camera turned to a doorway to show Summer Rae watching on. The camera panned back to Fandango, revealing he was aware of her presence.
Jerry Lawler was in the ring. He said the last time he was in this building, he did not think that he would ever be coming back. He thanked the hospital. Crowd chanted "Jerry". Lawler said that put a dampener on what was supposed to be a celebration of Pat Patterson and Bret Hart. Lawler then introduced Hart. Bret said that no matter what happened here in the past (can't let it go...), it's always an honour to be back in Montreal. He said that he speaks from the heart when he says that if he could just have one more match, it would be right here in Montreal. Damien Sandow, dressed as Bret Hart - with a grey wig, no less - then interrupted. Bret "The Hitman" Sandhart. Lawler thought he said Sandfart. And so began the inevitable referencing of the 1997 Survivor Series... Sandhart said his one regret was that he was actually proud to be from a third-world country like Canada. Bret Hart then punched him in the face, Sandow falling to the outside. A nothing segment, really. Sheamus then came out and fist bumped Bret and they hugged.
Match 5: United States Champion Sheamus pinned Bret Sandfart in a non-title match off the Brogue Kick. JBL screamed "Bret screwed Bret" on commentary.
Renee Young was backstage with The Miz. He had a letter from a kiss arse fan ("John RUSSO"...oh come on) who wanted Miz to put Jericho in his place for interrupting him last week. Crowd chanted "What?".
NETWORK PLUG running down the TV schedule for the week. They're sticking up WrestleMania XXX on Sunday. They revealed Bret Hart will also be a guest on Jericho's Highlight Reel on tomorrow night's Main Event.
Match 6: Chris Jericho tapped out The Miz with The Walls Of Jericho in 6:00. Jericho seems noticeably slower. After the match, the lights went out and upon coming back up Bray Wyatt was in his rocking chair on the stage. He asked how Jericho plans on saving an entire universe when he can't even save himself. Bray said last week he proved actions speak a lot louder than words. Bray will hold every word Jericho says against him; the fans he used to call "Jerichoholics" will now follow him. Jericho demanded Bray "shut the hell up". He said Bray was right in that his actions do speak louder than words. And his actions are to come up the ramp and beat Bray's ass. As Jericho left the ring, the lights in the building went out again and, back on, Harper and Rollins were standing beside Bray on the stage. They all stared each other down in the aisle as RAW went to commercial.
Match 7: Paige (in a jolly old mood, considering she lost her title last Monday) and Divas' Champion AJ Lee defeated Cameron and Naomi when Paige planted Cameron with the Paige Turner. AJ Lee and Paige are now best mates & are getting on like a house on fire. Paige even did the ring introduction for AJ. I feel like I've CLEARLY missed something on one of the B and C shows.
After the match Cameron and Naomi, having continued to have problems during the match as Cameron at various points refused to tag in, then got into a shoving contest before things finally broke out into quite the vicious cat fight. A few in the crowd comically chanted "Jerry, Jerry". A referee ran down and managed to break them both up.
Paul Heyman promo. Cesaro butted in, telling Paul he cannot talk to these people in English, as they are French Canadians. However they don’t even speak French, they speak Quebecois. The French cannot stand them, and neither can the rest of Canada. Cesaro called them "bogies" I think.
Match 8: Kofi Kingston defeated Cesaro (w/Paul Heyman) in 2:00 with a roll-up. Afterwards, a livid Cesaro went to work on Kofi Kingston. Big E ran down to make the save, running straight through Cesaro, who bailed to the outside.
John Cena was in his locker room when Seth Rollins walked in. Cena said Rollins was full of crap who wears a futuristic jumpsuit.
Roman Reigns vs. Rusev made for SmackDown.
Match 9: Bo Dallas beat El Torito in the death slot. Someone in the crowd loudly shouted "...you evil mummy strawberry floater!" to the amusement of the first few rows. As Bo was doing his victory lap he 'accidentally' ran over Torito on the outside, leaving Torito hilariously flat on his face.
We got a trailer for The Monday Night War: WWE vs. WCW.
Main Event: Seth Rollins vs. John Cena ended in Disqualification when Kane and Randy Orton ran in & put the beating on John Cena. Roman Reigns made the save & immediately dispatched of Kane and Randy Orton with Superman punches. As Reigns was distracted, Rollins nailed him from behind with the briefcase. He then turned his attentions to John Cena, who was also laid out with the metal case. Rollins then motioned for a referee to come to the ring. Just as he was about to cash in his briefcase, Dean Ambrose appeared from the crowd and jumped Rollins, attacking him on the outside. In the ring, Rollins was clotheslined right back out of the ring. With the two of them continuing to brawl in the aisle, Orton attempted to attack Cena. This being Cena however he instantly recovered and put Orton down with an AA. Kane then went for a Chokeslam on Cena, but Reigns made the save with a Spear. In a game of slight one-ups-manship, Cena and Reigns consecutively raised each other's arms while staring each other down to take RAW off the air!
- Joined in 2008
- Location: Botswana
WWE RAW Results 7/14/14 wrote:
Location: Richmond, VA
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry "The King" Lawler, and John "Bradshaw" Layfield
Monday Night RAW thundered onto the air ('You're now really struggling with varying these intos, eh Klein...') with WWE Champion John Cena making his way out looking incredibly smug. Cole plugged "one of the biggest main events in the history of RAW" as John Cena, Roman Reigns & Dean Ambrose take on Seth Rollins, Randy Orton & Kane later tonight. Cena called the crowd "feisty". They booed. John Cena said we need to sign up to the WWE Network as the free-preview ends tonight. Desperate, much? Cena said The Authority have put him in a Fatal Four Way at Battleground. Cena then ran down the rules. Before Cena could continue, Roman Reigns' music hit and he made his way through the crowd. Cena thanked him for bailing him out last week, telling him that he understands that it's every man for himself on Sunday, but they both need to make it to Sunday first. Reigns' interjected and told Cena to get to the point. Cena said they should handle The Authority tonight and get them out of the way first so on Sunday we can see if Roman is as good as he thinks he is. Roman responded by telling him that they should get rid of Randy Orton and Kane so it can be the two of them on Sunday, therefore we can all see if John is as good as he thinks he is. Dean Ambrose then interrupted on the Titan Tron. While he understands the testosterone in the ring, enough of all this 'prettiest girl at the dance' nonsense as they should be focused on The Authority. Ambrose said he had a plan and that's Plan Screw The Authority, so when Roman and John get finished they can all kick the Authority’s asses. Kane, Randy Orton and Seth Rollins then suddenly appeared, surrounding Ambrose. Ambrose attempted to get the jump on all 3 of them but to no avail, getting quickly overpowered and beaten down. After being repeatedly thrown into the steel garage door, & then chokeslammed onto a crate by Kane, Ambrose managed to muster a "Is that all you guys have got?". Rollins then jumped up onto a crate & nailed the curb stomp to Ambrose onto another wooden crate. John Cena and Roman Reigns were noticeably absent, having clearly got lost somewhere...
Back from commercial break, the announcers told us that Ambrose was being prepared to go to a local medical facility & may not even make the main event.
In an inset promo, Sheamus said Miz is afraid of getting hit in the face, but he won't have to worry about that happening tonight as he's going to kick it clean off his shoulders instead.
Miz came out and vowed victory in the Battle Royal. Miz claimed it only makes sense that a movie star, someone who is adored all over the world, should become champion. Miz continued that his goal is to keep the Brogue Kick away from the WWE’s most important asset, the ‘MoneyMaker’. Miz says that for his legions of fans, the MoneyMaker will be on the TitanTron throughout the duration of the match. He's talking about his face, by the way...
On commentary Michael Cole said it's Sheamus' goal to unite both the United States and Intercontinental Championships.
Match 1: The Miz defeated Sheamus in 11:00 with a roll-up. During the match itself, they put up a series of graphics running down the participants for the Battle Royal. Not in the corner, or trailed along the bottom...they actually left the match IN PROGRESS to get this in.
They noted Wade Barrett will be in attendance on Sunday to present the vacant Intercontinental Championship to the winner.
In the RAW office, Kane, Orton and Rollins were joking about what they'd just done to Dean Ambrose. Randy noted that if they do their job as well on Sunday, nothing will stop him from walking out WWE Champion. Kane piped in that maybe he will win at Battlegroud. Kane said that he has Orton’s back if Orton has his. Triple H walked in, telling them both that nothing is more important than making sure the WWE Title returns to The Authority, creating stability and control. And in order to make that happen, they have to build trust tonight. As they left, Stephanie entered and turned to her husband and told him that she loves the way he handles himself & exerts control in these situations. Stephanie and Hunter then snogged.
They once again plugged the free trial on the WWE Network.
Match 2: Dolph Ziggler defeated Fandango with the Fame-Asser in 3:00 after Fandango was distracted when his own music started playing & Summer Rae and Layla started dancing on the announce table. After the match, Summer Rae and Layla went over to Dolph "Val Venis" Ziggler and kissed him on the cheek. With Fandango just sitting there looking on in the corner, the women danced off with Ziggler.
We got promotional bullshit backstage with Damien Sandow telling a SONIC lady to piss off so he could eat one of their hotdogs. Adam Rose and his rose buds turned up and he got into a push/pull-off with a hotdog, Damien Sandow ultimately losing and sent rolling off the screen (he was seemingly on roller blades for some reason), which was immediately followed up with 'comedy' crashing sound effects. Adam Rose then ate the food and everyone danced off.
As The Usos were making their entrance, Erik Rowan and Luke Harper struck from behind & destroyed them both.
In a segment billed as a "USA - Russia Detente", Michael Cole was in the ring with Rusev and Lana. 2 podiums were set up in the ring. "The Real Americans", Zeb Colter and Jack Swagger, came out. Crowd chanted "USA". Lana began by speaking in Russian. She said Colter and America are the same: they simply choose violence to solve all their problems. America wants to be the saviour of the world yet they can't even save themselves and are stupid, along with the crowd. As the crowd broke out into another "USA" chant, Lana demanded America shut up. She noted that from birth the country was so stupid that when they won their independence from the British they started fighting amongst themselves. Unlike mother Russia, which is a peaceful and loving nation. Lana asked Colter to simply admit to his and his country's mistakes. Crowd chanted "USA" even louder, leading to Lana to tell them to shut up once again. Colter said she is a visitor in their country and she wants them to apologise? Colter called Rusev "Bull winkle", and then told her "Hell No!". They all stepped out from behind their podiums and went face-to-face. Lana said their arrogance is the reason the USA is now crumbling into pieces. However there is 1 man that has the remedy to help the disastrous situation and that's Putin. His face went up on the Tron. There was a Putin 3:16 sign in the crowd. Colter quipped that Putin is one ugly man. Colter said that America has a leader and that man is the President of the USA. Crowd booed the sight of Obama on the Tron. Colter said the US always respects their presidents, no matter personal opinions. Crowd, hilariously, booed still. Colter asked Rusev when he was going to step out from behind 'this woman' and be a man and accept the match against Swagger at Battleground. Rusev replied with "this is war". Colter said that sounded like a yes to him. Lana led Rusev out of the ring as Colter noted that he had always wondered who wore the pants, or the skirt, in the relationship. Colter then led the crowd in WE THE PEOPLE. Lana returned and slapped Colter, while Swagger went straight up to & tackled Rusev. Lana grabbed Swagger's hair, allowing Rusev to quickly regain the upper hand, sending Swagger head first into one of the podiums, and then splashing him in the corner. As Rusev went for a kick to the head, Swagger countered and applied the ankle lock. Rusev however managed to scramble out of the ring to the floor, hobbling. Colter waived Old Glory and Swagger stood tall in the ring.
Michael Cole revealed it would be "extremely doubtful" Dean Ambrose would make it back from the hospital for the main event.
Reigns was taping up in his locker room when John Cena walked in. Cena said what happened earlier with Ambrose was an obvious set up (yeah, no gooseberry fool). Cena demanded Reigns' stand up and trust him. Reigns replied that they may have taken out of their team, but tonight they take out all three of them.
Match 3: Alberto Del Rio defeated RVD with the Cross Arm Breaker.
In yet another WWE Network plug, they aired a trailer for CM Punk: Best in the World (the same DVD documentary) which premières tomorrow night.
Stephanie McMahon walked out onto the stage. She told Nikki that she was alll alone in the ring once again. When her sister quit she abandoned her. Tonight's match should be a tag match, but don't blame her, blame Brie.
Match 4: Alicia Fox and Cameron defeated Nikki Slobberknockers in a Tag Team Handicap match.
Cameron will face former partner Naomi on the Battleground Kick Off Show.
In a fantastic trailer, an orchestra played the WCW theme music to Sting. They then turned around to reveal they were all wearing Sting face paint. The camera then changed to reveal Sting standing there, along with a quick black and white montage of WCW footage. The crowd excitedly cheered in the background...which then turned to BOOES when the WWE 2K15 logo flashed on screen. The crowd evidently thinking this was confirming Sting's arrival to the WWE. Oh, and it's a PRE-ORDER EXCLUSIVE.
Triple H was in the RAW office when Randy Orton walked in. Orton asked if Triple H was sure about Kane. Hunter said not to worry about it, as Kane is just a pawn, whereas Orton is "the plan". Orton said if he is the plan then there is no need for a Plan B.
Stardust and Goldust were having one of their weird conversations backstage. "Can you explain that?" asked JBL. "Nope" was Cole's response to that.
Sheamus vs. The Miz was announced for Main Event tomorrow. Who the hell is subscribing to see that...
Match 5: In a hard hitting affair, Big E (w/Kofi Kingston) pinned Cesaro with the Big Ending. Cesaro attempted to nail Big E with a steel chair but Kofi took it away, leading directly to the finish.
Chris Jericho made his way out, demanding answers as to why he was attacked by the Wyatt's.
"Welcome to RAW. IS. JERICHO". Rather muted applause. Jericho said the WWE ring is home to him, & working in the WWE for 15 years, he has seen it all. Crowd now chanted "Y2J". Jericho then ran down a load of RAW moments, including when Undertaker almost got burned by his own pyro, Naked Mideon, & musical chairs which we "forgot about" apparently. How could we ever forget that?! Jericho said he thought he had seen everything...that is until he saw Bray Wyatt. Wyatt is an anomaly. He is an ominous presence. He is a freak surrounded by freaks & he has his eyes set on him and he doesn't know why. Jericho said that if Bray wants to get crazy at Battleground, he will get crazy. If he want to get a little nuts at Battleground, he can get nuts. Jericho noted that Bray likes to say he has the whole world in his hands, but he has the whole WWE Universe. Bray then appeared on the Tron. Bray, laughing, asked Jericho if he remembers what it was like to be a child, so full of energy and hope; running through the grass with no worries about the horrors that tomorrow will bring. Bray questioned what changes people. Bray said he has done a lot of bad things & gone to war with powerful men. But no matter how tough or mean they thought they were, they all screamed. About half the crowd chanted "BORING". Bray asked Jericho if he was afraid of the dark. The lights in the building then went out, and upon returning Harper and Rowan were in the ring surrounding Jericho. After a brief scuffle, Jericho managed to scarper under the bottom rope and make his escape up the ramp. He was suddenly nailed by Bray from behind. Jericho was then planted on the stage with Sister Abigail.
Paige was on commentary.
Match 6: Divas' Champion AJ Lee tapped out Eva Marie with the Black Widow in a non-title outing at 2:00. After the match AJ Lee sat on the announce table and she & Paige awkwardly exchanged insincere pleasantries. Paige challenges for the Divas' Championship on Sunday.
Back in the RAW office, Stephanie and Hunter were talking about a Flo Rida article or something that had appeared in USA Today when Kane walked in. He said he doesn't trust or like Randy Orton. Stephanie told him there are a lot of people who they work with that they do not like. Hunter re-iterated that what is best for business is the Championship coming back to The Authority & asks Kane 'just to get it done' no matter what.
Bo Dallas cut a promo. He said El Torito may be tiny but his heart is huge. He can only hope that his opponent tonight has an equally big heart. Out came Great Khali.
Match 7: Bo Dallas defeated Great Khali in 2:00 via Count-Out after hitting the Bo Dog off the apron to the floor. After the match Bo Dallas attempted to give Khali another of his inspirational speeches but was chopped down by Khali before he could finish. Dallas sheepishly backed away.
We got another WWE NETWORK plug from the announcers, this time for The Best of WCW Nitro, premièring directly after the conclusion of RAW. They then aired a trailer, immediately becoming the 2nd best thing on this programme so far behind the Stinger.
Seth Rollins was in the RAW Office with The Authority. "Don't worry Seth, we know what Plan B is". As Rollins left, Paul Heyman walked in. He said if for any reason they need a Plan C, then he's your man. Planting the seeds again for Brock Lesnar next month...
Ric Flair was shown heading towards the ring.
Back from commercial, Renee Young was in the ring to interview Ric Flair. Flair prancing about the place told the crowd that he's had some fun in Richmond, Virginia over the years. He then told everyone to go ask their mothers and fathers about it. After more styling and profiling and rather awkward flirting with Renee, she asked him who he thought was going to win the 4 Way on Sunday. Ric Flair said there is only one man you can believe in and that's John Cena. Roman Reigns' music then interupted and he came through the crowd. After a brief pause, both men shook hands and Flair made his exit.
On the stage, Cena passed Ric Flair and gave him the Big Gold World Title belt and told him to keep hold of it.
Chris Jericho will face Luke Harper on SmackDown.
Main Event: Roman Reigns and WWE Champion John Cena vs. Kane, Randy Orton and Seth Rollins ended in Disqualification when Kane and Randy Orton refused to stop putting the boots to Cena in the ring and referee Charles Robinson called for the bell. Just prior to the finish, Seth Rollins appeared to injure his knee & was limping quite badly. The referee held up the dreaded X sign and a trainer was shown running over in the background. Rollins was not seen for the remainder of the show. Afterwards, Randy Orton went after John Cena but ended up accidentally knocking Kane off the apron when Cena moved out of the way. Reigns then got back in the ring & was about to Spear Randy Orton but he moved & Reigns went right through Cena instead. With a retuning Kane taking care of Reigns, Orton came to & planted Kane with an RKO. After celebrating on the buckle, Orton walked right into a Roman Reigns Spear. Reigns celebrated to take RAW off the air!
- Joined in 2008
- Location: Botswana
WWE RAW Results 7/21/14 wrote:
Location: American Airlines Arena; Miami, Flo Rida
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry "The King" Lawler, and John "Bradshaw" Layfield
With WWE officially on the the road to SummerSlam 27, and on the verge of a brand new era (supposedly), Monday Night RAW exploded onto the air less than 24 hours removed from a Pay Per View shrouded in negativity & controversy. Triple H made his way out to kick us off, as the announcers revealed Triple H will decide the new Number 1 Contender for the WWE World Championship at SummerSlam on August 17. Triple H said it was funny that he has been walking around backstage all day & nobody has wanted to look him in the eye, as if they were worried about him blowing a gasket at the fact the belt didn't come home to The Authority last night; the strap rather staying around the waist of John Cena. Triple H said he was mad - madder than he has ever been in a long time in fact - but he has options. Triple H mockingly said he was going to Tweet his displeasure until his fingers bleed. Hell, he might even send an Instagram or a Vine. Maybe he'll riot, and if that doesn't work then he and his friend "Mark" (oh very clever) are going to stop watching altogether. I guess the bad press today hit a nerve. Triple H continued that maybe he could just fire everyone; throwing everyone out of the building & into the weather. Or he could just relax knowing sooner or later he always wins, and if he has to wait 4 more weeks then so be it. 'But like a true genius once said, he can guaran-damn-tee' John Cena won't be the Champion. However, the question is, who will it be. Randy Orton's music then interjected and he made his way out. Orton asked if Hunter was really doing this. Orton said that for 4 months he has been owed a rematch & if he gets a it at SummerSlam in a 1-1 match he will beat John Cena. Hunter said while he appreciates the confidence, and Orton makes a compelling argument, he hasn't made his mind up yet. Hunter said he was going to allow the entire roster to convince him throughout the night. Hunter said he wants someone to go the extra mile and show him that they want it more than anyone else; more than they breathe. Randy stepped in and said that if Kane had done his duty last night, he would be champion right now. Kane's pyro then exploded and out he walked. Kane told HHH that he hopes he is being considered, because he knows he can beat Cena and bring the title back to the Authority...as long as he isn't acting like Orton's protector, & like a baby sitter. As Orton and Kane proceeded to get in each other's face, Roman Reigns interrupted and made his way through the crowd. Reigns said if they're going to have a conversation about the title then his name belongs in it, because last time he checked nobody wanted to see Cena vs Kane, and nobody wanted to see Orton vs Cena yet again. Rather it sounds like everyone wants to see Roman Reigns vs Cena. About 70% of the crowd cheered. Reigns then attacked Kane with the Superman punch, forcing Orton to quickly slither away under the bottom rope. Triple H said he believes Roman Reigns is going to have a match...against both Kane and Randy Orton...and he believes that's going to take place right now!
Match 1: In a Handicap match, Roman Reigns defeated Kane and Randy Orton after Kane and Orton got into an argument that resulted in Kane goozling Orton on the apron. Kane then turned right into a Superman Punch and Spear, as Orton simply watched on. Following the match, Orton teased getting in the ring to face Reigns but ultimately thought better of it and backed off.
Clearly having forgotten the ratings disasters that has been almost every single concert in the history of pro wrestling (boy, wasn't KISS an absolute hoot...), they hyped the upcoming musical interlude we're all unfortunately being forced to endure at the hands of Flo Rida.
Bray Wyatt on the Highlight Reel.
In the 2nd Handicap match, the announcers revealed Nikki will take on Cameron, Alicia Fox, Eva Marie and, having presumably finished sucking off Dok Hendrix, a returning Rosa Mendes. Next.
Those 4 Divas were talking backstage when Stephanie McMahon, sporting her satanic looking grin, walked up behind them & said that this was a "glorious, glorious night" - as not only were they going to reveal the new contender for John Cena's championship, but all 4 of the Divas' are going to annihilate Nikki and teach her sister Brie a lesson in the process.
Nikki Bella made her way out to the ring, hugging her sister Brie who was in the front row. Stephanie McMahon immediately interrupted, sarcastically telling Nikki that she did a great job 'feigning surprise' at her sister being in the front row. Stephanie walked over to Brie, accidentally calling her Nikki as she did so, and said she has gone from being a world famous Diva to just another face in the crowd. Which is fitting. Stephanie noted how Brie abandoned her sister for her husband, the B+ Player. Daniel Bryan was then stripped of the WWE Championship and has been on the shelf ever since. "Smart move", Steph said sarcastically. Brie called Stephanie a bitch, as WWE muted the audio. Stephanie demanded security eject Brie from the building but Brie pulled out a ticket. Stephanie quipped that Brie was blocking the view of the people. Brie snatched the microphone out of Stephanie's hand & called her a "vindictive bitch", this time uncensored. Stephanie responded by slapping Brie in the face. Brie attempted to hit Stephanie back but security pulled her away.
Match 2: Cameron, Alicia Fox, Rosa Mendes and Eva Marie defeated Nikki Bella at 1:00 in a 4 on 1 Handicap match after all 4 women quickly beat her down and then Alicia Fox pinned her following an axe kick.
After the match the 4 Divas' rolled Nikki out of the ring. Stephanie then got into Nikki's face and said she would do what Brie did and quit. Stephanie walked off gleefully. Nikki Bella's tits slipped out of her ring attire. Screen grabs over at our Twitter account @GRcadeWrestling.
Bo Dallas was kneeling in the ring when Damien Sandow came out dressed as LeBron James. Damien asked if the people were expecting Michael Jordan. He said he took his talents from South Beach back to Cleveland. He then told Bo to Bo-Lieve that he should leave so people do not have to see his goofy smile any longer.
Match 3: Bo Dallas pinned Damien Sandow with the Running Bo-Dog in 2:00.
The plugged Fozzy's new album.
The Highlight Reel set was in the ring. The announcers notified us a "situation" had occurred on the WWE App. The Wyatt Family then announced their arrival, before then making their way out. During the break, Chris Jericho was attacked at the hands of the Family. "Hello everyone!" Bray bellowed, as he welcomed everyone to the Highlight Reel...to no reaction. He said Jericho was a bit indisposed. They then aired the footage on the Tron. Jericho was attacked in his locker room; Bray levelling him with Sister Abigail into the lockers. Back in the arena, a smattering of the crowd booed. Bray asked where their saviour was now. Bray said he was there instead, just like he has been every day. Just because Jericho had his arm raised last night, we believe him to be the better man, but a loss in a battle means nothing to him, as it's the war that counts. Bray said he created war, and it wasn't so long ago that the Wyatt Family entered the ring for the very first time and in that short time they have destroyed monsters and brought 'so called heroes' to their knees.
Bray said he is every bit the monster we all think he is. Crowd, growing restless, started chanting "What?". Bray said Abigail told him to be careful about chasing vengeance as he would need to dig 2 graves: one for his enemy, and one for himself. Bray closed by saying he is forever.
Backstage, Chris Jericho was shown slumped bleeding by the ear & being checked on by the WWE trainer. R-Truth, clearly not watching the bloody show whatsoever, asked Jericho what happened.
Flo Rida, accompanied by his entourage & swathed in tacky Argos-esque jewellery, was shown walking backstage and hugging various talent (Ziggler, Naomi, Big E...). Crowd were already booing in the background.
We got a video for 25% off WWEShop using the code: RAW25.
Match 4: In a non-title outing, Dolph Ziggler pinned new Intercontinental Champion The Miz with the ZigZag. This featured some of the loudest, most amateurish, blatantly obvious spot-calling I've ever heard for as long as I've been watching wrestling. During the second half of the bout it foreshadowed everything.
Backstage, Triple H was talking to Seth Rollins. Hunter noted Seth has no reason to face Cena for the title at SummerSlam as he holds all the cards. Seth replied that whenever he has a hand to play, Dean Ambrose is always there to screw things up. Seth says that they need to stop Dean Ambrose for good. Cesaro then walked in trying to convince Triple H he should be the Number 1 contender. Cesaro then revealed, as of right now, he is no longer a 'Heyman guy', rather he wants to he Triple H's guy. Seth chipped in that he is already the guy. Triple H said there is unfinished business named Dean Ambrose. If Cesaro can finish that business, it would be something that would impress him. Cesaro told HHH consider it done.
AJ Lee was shown skipping along backstage, as she ran into Paige sitting on a crate. They team next!
Match 5: Paige and AJ Lee defeated Natalya and Emma after AJ Lee applied the Black Widow to Natalya. After the match, Paige and AJ embraced. Paige then yanked AJ down and dismantled her around ringside, throwing her into the barricade & head first into the ring post. Paige screamed that "this is my house", before then launching AJ Lee right over the announce table.
Announcers once again plugged the live medley by Flo Rida.
Match 5: Zack Ryder (I thought he was dead), accompanied by Summer Rae and Layla (who wasn't wearing a bra in quite the dress...), pinned Fandango with the Rough Ryder. No this whole sentence isn't a typo. Fandango had his foot on the bottom rope during the pin but Layla brushed it off.
Renee Young interviewed Flo Rida backstage when Heath Slater turned up. After some verbals, Heath Slater shoved Flo. Mr Good Feeling then floored Heath with a shove of his own.
They revealed Rusev will square off against Sheamus tomorrow night on Main Event.
Stephanie McMahon introduced Flo Rida for his mini-concert. Flo Rida sang in front of a fantastically disinterested crowd. Stephanie told us to give it up for Flo Rida one more time.
Two plain clothes police officers then turned up and confronted Stephanie McMahon at ringside. They asked her if she had hit Brie Bella earlier tonight. Stephanie replied that she had slapped Brie but only after Brie had hit her. The officers than told Stephanie they were arresting her for battery and then read Stephanie her rights. Stephanie was handcuffed. Brie Bella turned up from out of the crowd & Stephanie and Brie then got into a screaming match. Stephanie shouted that Brie would pay for what she'd done. With Brie dragged out, Stephanie McMahon was carted out of the building & into an awaiting unmarked police car backstage. Triple H said "Jerry" was on the phone and she would be out of there in 5 minutes.
Triple H was on the phone in his office when Joey Matthews told him that the car was ready. Triple H was about to leave when Joey asked about SummerSlam. Hunter replied family comes first. Triple H then comically came to the realisation it would take time for Stephanie to get processed, therefore he still had time to make his decision. He could then go see his wife afterwards....
Match 6: Ryback and Curtis Axel defeated Big E and Kofi Kingston in 3:00 when Ryback pinned Kofi.
After the match, Xavier Woods suddenly appeared in the ring, wearing a white suit and acting like a preacher, telling Kofi and Big E it was "their" time to take it, as you cannot move ahead by kissing babies and shaking hands, nor can you move ahead by doing what you are told. It is up to them to find order & together it was their time to find purpose. Quite obvious where this is going...
Triple H was shown in the RAW office speaking to somebody on the phone.
They recapped Chris Jericho getting beaten up on the WWE App.
Lana took the microphone and started speaking in Russian but was cut off by the arrival of Great Khali.
Match 7: Rusev (w/Lana) defeated Great Khali with the Camel Clutch in a total stinker that was greeted with boos, and appeared to have Michael Cole with his head in his hands in the background.
We got a clip from Royal Pains, guest staring Sheamus.
Another nonsensical but mildly humorous piece from Goldust and Stardust backstage.
They replayed Stephanie McMahon's altercation with Brie and ensuing arrest later in the night.
Renee Young was outside The Authority's office. She said that she had heard Stephanie will be arraigned later tonight but may have been charged with resisting arrest.
Main Event: Dean Ambrose vs. Cesaro ended in Disqualification when Ambrose just decided to nail Cesaro with a steel chair to the arm.
Backstage, Renee Young was still standing in front of the RAW office when Triple H walked out. He said he was just on his way to the ring right now to reveal Cena's opponent for SummerSlam. Renee questioned why Hunter wasn't with his wife at the police station. Triple H just stared at her, Renee quickly realising she'd put her foot in it.
They announced Roman Reigns vs. Alberto Del Rio for Friday's SmackDown.
COO Triple H was in the ring. Triple got right to it and introduced Cena's opponent: Randy Orton. Before Orton could get into the ring however Roman Reigns attacked, & they both brawled through the crowd and to the back, leaving Triple H contemplating what to do in the ring. Paul Heyman walked out onto the stage. Heyman said he has great respect for Triple H, but not to point out the obvious, Plan A hasn't worked out, and Plan B is going to keep getting thwarted by Dean Ambrose. Therefore the Authority needs to make the dangerous choice of implementing Plan C.
Bang on the hour Brock Lesnar's music hit and out walked Lesnar. Paul Heyman, followed by Brock Lesnar, shook Triple H's hand. Hunter then left the ring. Heyman introduced himself and he said that his client conquered the Undertaker’s undefeated streak, which is why at this moment, his client is announcing his intention to conquer John Cena and take the WWE World Championship at SummerSlam. Heyman noted that his client acknowledges there's a divide that permeates through the WWE. One where on one side you have those with their green t-shirts and pump up sneakers that scream ‘Let’s Go Cena’. Then there are those whose Mum's don’t still tuck them into bed at night. They scream ‘Cena sucks’. However it's irrelevant, as come SummerSlam his client is going to give the 'Doctor of Thuganomics' the beating of a lifetime. We got a video package on Brock Lesnar ending the Streak at WrestleMania XXX. I guess we're supposed to forget when Cena beat Lesnar at Extreme Rules back in 2012. Heyman proclaimed that Brock Lesnar is not the stereotypical villain who will offer John to surrender the Championship to escape a beating. John Cena cannot escape the beating he has coming to him. Heyman ends by saying that he is the 1 behind the 1 in 21 and 1, & come SummerSlam his client will become the new WWE Champion. Brock Lesnar just stood there to take RAW off the air in very anticlimactic fashion.
- Joined in 2008
- Location: Botswana
WWE RAW Results 7/28/14 wrote:
Location: Toyota Center; Texas
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry "The King" Lawler and John "Bradshaw" Layfield
Monday Night RAW kicked off with WWE World Heavyweight Champion John Cena making his way out with both championships draped around his neck. Cena stood there looking concerned in the ring to the usual mixed reaction.Cena said he hoped Plan C would never happen; he is a marked man by The Authority so badly that they hired a mercenary: THE Brock Lesnar. Cena noted how the WWE Universe wants to see Lesnar beat the hell out of him. Crowd chanted "Yes!". Brock Lesnar is the most devastating force in the WWE. 40 men have been able to say they were champion but only 1 has defeated The Streak. Crowd were now chanting "What?". At SummerSlam Cena said he going to get the beating of a lifetime, but he will not lay down; he is going to SummerSlam to beat Brock Lesnar just like he did in 2012. Cena said if he doesn't beat Lesnar there is nobody that can control him, not even Paul Heyman. Speak of the devil, Pay Heyman interrupted on the stage. Heyman vowed Lesnar will conquer Cena at the PPV and take his World Championship. Heyman told Cena that he thought it was very courageous of him to realise the beating that is coming his way, but that is still mighty big words for a man that is about to be turned into a victim. Heyman asked if Cena knows what it's like to be victimised; just ask The Undertaker. 'Sorry, you can't...because nobody has heard from Undertaker. Not a text, phone call, nothing'. Heyman said Cena is on the defensive, whereas his client was looking to conquer him, and that's the difference. Lesnar is on the offensive; he isn't going to F5 and pin Cena, he is is going to victimise John Cena. Heyman said Cena loves being in WWE, whereas the only thing Lesnar is passionate about is when he's inflicting pain on his victim. Heyman said all Cena is going to end up is "Beaten. Victimised. Conquered." John Cena said he was sick of listening to Heyman's crap. Cena said one thing Heyman can understand is passion. Cena brought up ECW & got the crowd chanting ECW. Cena noted that those that watched ECW and fought on behalf of Heyman had that passion and even to this day it still brings a smile to the cold dark heart of Heyman. Cena said WWE is his life and good, bad, or indifferent, he shows up on time because he loves the WWE. Whereas that 300 pound gorilla has no passion. He is big, strong, and he is a super athlete, but the thing that separates them both is heart. And Lesnar is going to have to beat every last breath out of his body because no matter what he's walking into SummersSam and walking out with 'this son of a bitch', holding the championship belts aloft. Cesaro then interrupted and hugged Heyman. Cesaro said even though they've decided to go their separate ways, he won't allow Heyman to be insulted. Cesaro called Cena a "muscled up walking billboard". Cena left the ring. Cesaro asked where Cena gets his sneakers from, K-Mart? He then said Cena can't possibly wrestle in those sneakers...then again he just can't wrestle. Cesaro challenged Cena, to which he accepted.
You can go to http://www.skysports.com/superhero for a chance to win tickets to WWE SummerSlam on August 17.
Match 1: John Cena defeated Cesaro in a non-title match with an AA off the second rope in 14:00.
Stephanie was backstage in the RAW office with Triple H. She said that she thought she could do it & keep up appearances but she can't go back; she can't bare seeing the disappointment in their daughters eyes. Stephanie told Triple H that "this had better work". Triple H promised it would, when Randy Orton walked in and said they needed to talk. Orton questioned what happened to the original plan last week. Hunter told him that "plans change". Triple H said while he could change the match for SummerSlam he isn't going to because as long as Roman Reigns is in the picture Orton is never going to get a shot. Reigns will just keep screwing it up. Hunter said that if Orton wants another shot then get rid of him. Orton said he will take Reigns out tonight. Hunter instead made a match between Kane and Roman Reigns. Orton replied that not only does he now have a problem with Reigns, he has a problem with Kane too...and Triple H. Orton stormed off, leaving Hunter seething.
Paige skipped her way down to the ring. She said that she just wanted to set the record straight. Paige, making excuses for last week's attack on Lee, said as she is young she sometimes allows emotions get the better of her. However she still considers AJ Lee her best friend in the world & last week she crossed the line. Paige promised she would never act that way again. AJ Lee then came out, also skipping to the ring. Lee called her a "Sweet, Caspar looking crumpet". Paige attempted to interrupt but AJ cut her off saying she wasn't finished. AJ Lee continued that she understands what it's like to have the Divas' championship taken away as the same thing happened to her at the hands of Paige. But she doesn't play 'little girl games' or smile to someone then whisper behind their back. AJ Lee said that if she wants to talk crap about someone then she'll do it to their face. Paige replied that AJ is her friend and if she doesn’t believe that then AJ must be crazy. Lee stood there with that nutty look on her face. Paige sarcastically said she would never make fun of AJ's mental health. Old gimmicks coming back here. AJ said she understood...and sometimes we all make mistakes, even those that are a little off their rockers. Lee then attacked Paige & sent her into the ringside barricades. Paige managed to stop herself from being thrown into the steps and backed off, screaming that she thought they were supposed to be friends. Crowd meanwhile were more interested in predictably chanting for "CM Punk".
As the night of incessant talking continued, Triple H made his way out alongside his wife, "One of the Principal Owners", Stephanie McMahon. They recapped last week's altercation and ensuing arrest involving Brie and Stephanie. Triple H said we've spent a lot of moments together. Hunter said that he has been both proud and disappointed in us the fans, however he has never been more disappointed - more than that, disgusted - with us than he is right now. We laughed when Stephanie was arrested. Crowd chanted "Yes". We laughed when the mother of his children was handcuffed. We found it funny that she was handcuffed like a common criminal, & we have the guts to laugh and sing as she was being carted out of the building. Triple H said he will never forgive us for that.
Triple H said it was all over a simple misunderstanding; the whole world knows it was Brie who antagonised his wife, which made it perfectly understandable that Stephanie then struck Brie - she was asking for it. But nonetheless, it was still a simple misunderstanding. The reality of the situation is all the charges against his wife have been dropped, with the exception of one: assault and battery. Triple H said Brie has refused to let it go, therefore they are here tonight to try and reconcile and put this whole incident behind them. Stephanie took the microphone to boos. Hunter motioned for the crowd to shut up in the background. Stephanie asked Brie to come out so they can get it over with. Instead Chris Jericho walked out. This is going to be like old times. Triple H said Chris may not have noticed but they were kinda in the middle of something. Jericho said he just wanted to let them both know how bad he feels about the whole thing. Jericho said he feels so bad he wanted to sing a song. "Bad boys, bad boys... whatcha gonna do...watcha gonna do when they come for you". Crowd sang along. Badly. Jericho said they sounded great (complete bullshit). Hunter mock laughed. #jailbird was now trending on Twitter. Jericho quipped orange is the new black in 2014 & it was alright to be in jail these days. Jericho said that these are the moments that the WWE Network was created for (forced) so we can relive these incidents over and over. Jericho said in all seriousness Triple H has stood by his wife through everything. He then mocked Hunter's nose. Jericho then questioned why, when she was arrested, Hunter didn't leave the arena with her. Instead it wasn't until 15 minutes after the show had ended that he came to his wife's aid. Jericho said he thinks he knows the reason however. It's because Stephanie is a "Filthy...dirty...brutal...bottom feeding, trash bag hoe!" Hunter said maybe Jericho should focus more on Bray. Jericho said he is completely focused on Bray, stating he in fact wants to face him tonight. Hunter told Jericho he's going to have to wait until SummerSlam, as for tonight...before Hunter could finish Seth Rollins nailed Jericho from behind with the Money in the Bank briefcase. Triple H revealed Jericho's opponent tonight would indeed be one Seth Rollins. I guess Hunter and Steph will be back out later...
They replayed the opening segment with John Cena and Paul Heyman, because that's just what everyone needed on this broadcast...more talk.
The Miz came out in a white suit and scarf looking like an imbecile.
Match 2: In a somewhat sloppy six man tag, Dolph Ziggler & Tag Team Champions The Uso's defeated Ryback, Curtis Axel and Intercontinental Champion The Miz in 10:00 when Dolph planted Ryback with the ZigZag for the pin. During the match Xavier Woods, Big E, and Kofi Kingston were shown watching on backstage & later came out to ringside.
R-Truth asked the crowd what was up. Bo Dallas came out and cut a promo telling Truth he can never be undefeated like him. In fact Truth has lost a lot of matches in his career, but one day he will be victorious...all he has to do is BO-Lieve.
Match 3: R-Truth rolled up Bo Dallas in 30 seconds.
After the match Bo Dallas lost the plot and assaulted Truth with the microphone & then dropped him with a double arm DDT.
They recapped Stephanie McMahon and Triple H getting interrupted by Jericho.
Putin was up on the Titan Tron as we came back from commercial. Lana buried the American flag to chants of "USA!" from the crowd. Lana demanded they shut up. And so they did. She said the flag used to mean something but now Old Glory is a faded banner for a nation ruled by cowards who get fat off their apathy. Russia meanwhile continues to prove its might and is led by the fearless leader Vladimir Putin. Obama instead wags his finger like a school teacher. She called Obama 'a laughable, pathetic leader'. A photo of former President George Bush was then put up on the Tron. Swagger and Colter interrupted. Colter said the US flag is a real flag. It represents family sitting around a table at Thanksgiving giving thanks they survived another year. It represents pick-up trucks, pretty girls, and beer. Crowd chanted "USA" again. Colter said it represents all those that died to protect the freedoms of America. Jack Swagger then bolted down the ramp and he and Rusev got into it on the outside. Rusev gained the upper hand and threw Swagger back in the ring. Swagger managed to reverse and was about to put Rusev in the Ankle Lck when Rusev also managed to reverse & scarper to the outside. Swagger then nailed Rusev off the ring apron to the floor. Swagger stood tall in the ring as they both held onto their respective flags & stared each other down.
Damien Sandow came out dressed as an astronaut. "Houston we have a problem. Thousands of problems, and they're all seated in the arena." Sandow called the crowd knitwits, dimwits and halfwits & said something about it being one giant leap into the toilet for mankind. Adam Rose came out and told him to stop being a lemon.
Match 4: Adam Rose (w/The Rose Buds) pinned Damien Sandow with the Party Foul in 10 seconds.
Dean Ambrose vs. Del Rio was announced for Main Event tomorrow night, not that it means jack gooseberry fool for what may actually happen tomorrow night.
Roman Reigns vs. Kane never took place as Roman Reigns was attacked by Randy Orton as he was coming out through the crowd. After initially managing to fight off both men, Reigns was planted with a Chokeslam in the ring at the hands of Kane. Kane looked at Orton, before opting to walk out. Randy Orton then proceeded to dismantle Reigns around ringside, repeatedly throwing him into the steel steps & performing a draping DDT off the barricade. Randy Orton took apart the announce table and dropped Reigns with two RKO's, the second collapsing the table. Orton screamed at a downed Reigns' that this is what happens when he's cost a championship match.
Back from commercial, Reigns' was shown being helped up by the trainer and referees.
Match 5: Diego (w/El Torito, Layla and Summer Rae) defeated Fandango with a roll-up at 2:00. After the match Fandango asked "Why?" but was Gored off the apron by El Torito. Layla and Summer Rae then kissed the bull and he fainted.
Stephanie McMahon knocked on the Divas' locker room backstage when Nikki Bella answered. Nikki said Brie would definitely be there later tonight. Nikki told her that "It isn't often people like you eat a plate of crap, I just hope you like the taste of it."
In another bizarre segment, Goldust and Stardust were backstage. Something about a cosmic key...look, I don't know...
Match 6: Natalya and Naomi defeated Cameron and Alicia Fox when Naomi submitted Cameron with a leg scissors in 2:00.
Main Event: Chris Jericho vs. Seth Rollins ended in a No Contest when The Wyatt Family appeared in the ring & Seth Rollins just vanished. The Wyatt's then beat up Jericho and Bray put him down with Sister Abigail.
Triple H and Stephanie were shown heading towards the ring.
Chris Jericho vs. Erik Rowan was announced for SmackDown.
Stephanie McMahon, sans Triple H, made her way out. They once again replayed Brie quitting & slapping Stephanie at Payback. They then repeated Stephanie getting arrested from last week. Stephanie said she stood in the ring a humbled women. Getting arrested is a life altering experience, and as a principal owner of WWE she represents four generations of McMahon's, representing the company and their sponsors. Now they cannot look her in the eye without considering her a criminal. Stephanie said it has affected her both personally and professionally. Their children are getting teased at camp & are scarred for life. Brie Bella then entered through the crowd.
Brie told Stephanie to get to the point rather than standing there like a whiny rich bitch. Stephanie told Brie that she wants her to drop the charges as nobody deserves this. Brie responded by telling Stephanie to go to hell. Stephanie said that she may have taken advantage of Nikki, and vowed to treat her fair and professionally. Stephanie then promised to give Nikki a raise if Brie drops the charges. Brie refused and said she will see her in court. Stephanie begged Brie to reconsider. Brie asked for her job back. Stephanie said one Bella on the WWE roster was quite enough. Stephanie eventually relented and agreed. However Brie wasn't happy and wanted one more thing...a match with Stephanie at SummerSlam. Stephanie said that she hasn’t competed in more than 10 years, opting instead to dedicate her career to being a wife and a Mum. She told Brie to reconsider. Brie said that if she doesn’t get the match, she won’t drop the charges. Stephanie said she would not lower herself to those standards. Brie once again told Stephanie that she will see her in court. Stephanie, growing increasingly upset, finally agreed. Stephanie then suddenly slapped Brie off the ring apron to the floor. Stephanie turned her back and started chanting "Yes!" in unison with the crowd, allowing Brie to recover and attack her. In a brawl rather reminiscent of Trish Stratus and Stephanie in 2001, they then went at it until officials ran down to try and pull them apart, to little avail. Triple H then finally ran down & the two women were separated. With all and sundry dragging Stephanie away, she screamed that at SummerSlam she will make Brie 'her bitch' to take RAW off the air!
Who is online
Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 14 guests