GRcade

I've said this before but people who just leave their lunch in the canteen fridge and never take it out so it just goes rotten. We've had this issue for ages and there is a notice on the fridge warning people not to leave stuff in the fridge for more than two days but it still happens.
I got in today and the sheer stench when I opened the fridge nearly made me throw up. My first thought once I shut the door and got my bearings was to chuck the fridge out the window.

The culprit seems to have been a tub of soup with a best before date of early January that fermented long enough for the lid to have been forced off by the gas being produced by the rotting taking place inside the container.

I've taken a picture of the container and attached it to a company wide email asking for the policy to be changed so that the cleaners empty the fridge everyday. Some people have tried to stop a policy like that being introduced before but they can strawberry float off now. There's no doubt in my mind that what I got a lungful of today was legitimately dangerous due to the fact I disoriented by it for a minute or two. It was more like the smell of an industrial cleaner than it was rotting food.

Moggy wrote:

Rocsteady wrote:People who don't believe in global warming because it's cold outside. Good to know that decades of climate science can be negated by looking out of the window. strawberry floating spaztoids.

It’s 30 degrees in Alice Springs at the moment, but -2 degrees in Aberdeen.

So called “scientists” say that hot air rises, so how it is warmer in the southern hemisphere than the northern hemisphere?

The only answer is that global warming is a myth and the temperature differences can be explained by the Earth being flat, Australia is at the centre and Scotland is on the outside of the disc, heat dissipates from the centre and so that’s why it is colder at the edges.

Science bitch, science.

Then explain this...



Yeah thought so, you just got Rekt.

strawberry floating idiots who think that because the pavement is a bit icy/slushy that it's a good idea to walk on the road instead and not even get outbox the road when cars are coming.

People like that deserve to be hit by a car.

are they at least walking into oncoming traffic and not with their back to the cars?

Frank wrote:are they at least walking into oncoming traffic and not with their back to the cars?

When the road is narrowed because of cars parked on both sides of it and it's essentially down to one lane in most places they're basically doing both.

Three letters arrived in the post today, all strawberry floating parking fines.

One for me is for being too long at a retail park where I stayed longer than 2 hours (30 minutes over). Utterly ridiculous as I was not aware of the limit and by the time you factor in lunch, how are you supposed to finish in time? Fee is £90 but as I've paid early, "only £50". Never going back there and will not shed a tear when these companies go out of business due to the internet.

Fines 2 and 3 were for my son (at university but car's registered here). Looks like he was not aware that the place he parked expected payment after 6pm and so has two fines of £70 (£35 if you pay early with one needing to be paid tomorrow even though the fine arrived today) for an 18 and 30 minute park.

Utter BS.

Buskers on my local high street. Everyone thinks they're going to be the next big thing - yes well done you've got an average singing voice and a trendy haircut, so have 10,000 other people. Oh wow you also play an instrument, how amazing, here let me pull my trousers down right now and wank into your guitar case.

There's a European lad who stands in Belfast playing what can only be described as a weird fiddle. He plays the same thing over and over. I can only imagine his music being used in a torture chamber.

Preezy wrote:Buskers on my local high street. Everyone thinks they're going to be the next big thing - yes well done you've got an average singing voice and a trendy haircut, so have 10,000 other people. Oh wow you also play an instrument, how amazing, here let me pull my trousers down right now and wank into your guitar case.

I'm guessing from this it is only talented buskers where you wank into their collections?

Preezy wrote:Buskers on my local high street. Everyone thinks they're going to be the next big thing - yes well done you've got an average singing voice and a trendy haircut, so have 10,000 other people. Oh wow you also play an instrument, how amazing, here let me pull my trousers down right now and wank into your guitar case.

My annoyance is the ones who have amps and speakers so you can hear them ten streets away.

Death's Head wrote:

Preezy wrote:Buskers on my local high street. Everyone thinks they're going to be the next big thing - yes well done you've got an average singing voice and a trendy haircut, so have 10,000 other people. Oh wow you also play an instrument, how amazing, here let me pull my trousers down right now and wank into your guitar case.

I'm guessing from this it is only talented buskers where you wank into their collections?

Obviously, I don't waste my seed on talentless husks.

Zaichik wrote:My annoyance is the ones who have amps and speakers so you can hear them ten streets away.

This is what prompted me to share my annoyance.

Loudness wars strawberry float me off. I've busked but I've been playing guitar for 21 years and can rattle off some pretty rare and extremely difficult serenade type background music, so I'm never moved on. But then you'll have some banana split hitting the same 3 chords through a 2 driver battery operated amp with reverb pumped up. I've had the same people come up to me and be like, "[so you're not gooseberry fool then] what are you ging to do with your talent?" Well what the strawberry float are you going to do since you have none? It's a distraction and intimidation tactic by aggressive competing buskers to basically stop you playing and have people walk past when you could be earning money, and it's quite funny when they get all concerned about it. That's why you have people that end up buying amps because (a) they're gooseberry fool and/or (b) someone else is busking in the same area who is actually good. Solution? Destroy them with amplification. Assholes.

If people want to hear you they will listen, you don't have to make them listen. If you need to play amplified, get yourself booked into a strawberry floating gig instead of overplaying anyone and anything else. And if you can't get a gig, stay at home and practice, maybe start with a google query like "guitar tabs -oasis -chartcunt"

Having said that, busking is an important and traditional part of musicianship, part of British folklore, the bard, the troubadour etc. But so often it is little more than begging if you're no good, so please don't add an amp. I'm not sure who I'm talking to at this point, so...

Don't worry about though because it's a strawberry floating soulcrushing thing if you actually do it as a job so most don't last long unless they have literally nothing else to do. For those who are decent you can make some fair money and some (although I doubt all) pay taxes as well (most won't earn nearly enough to pay anyway).

This obsession with loudness needs to end. I've seen bands over the past few years who are just like 'EVRYTING TO 11!!1!!!' and they sound like gooseberry fool as a result. It is not a competition to be the loudest member of the band.

The majority of amps sound like total gooseberry fool to me when they are pushed to the brink anyway. I love guitar playing, but there's nothing more obnoxious than a busker dialled to 10.

On the flipside, you sometimes get opera students in the city centre who are always a pleasure to listen to.

I remember when I used to go on nights out in Durham and there was a lad on a sax who would play When the Saints Go Marching In, over and over and over. And that’s it. He’d skip the notes about a bit to make it sound all jaunty. Probably made a fortune.

Yeah you need a repertoire.. my circuit is usually around 10 2-5 minute pieces with turnarounds and in-between so you could probably listen for an hour and not get bored. I've had people sit and eat lunch or whatever for half an hour.

Buffalo wrote:I remember when I used to go on nights out in Durham and there was a lad on a sax who would play When the Saints Go Marching In, over and over and over. And that’s it. He’d skip the notes about a bit to make it sound all jaunty. Probably made a fortune.

Still better than wonderwall

The number of times I heard that in Durham

There used to be a couple of lads in Glasgow that played slide guitar and upright bass blues rock that were usually pretty rad. Not seen them in years though. And there's occasionally a guy who plays a variety of bass techniques with a looper and drum machine, hopefully he's just away for the winter.

Apart from that it ranges from wannabe X-factor types and people playing actual dogshit covers, through to performances you wish were parody but unfortunately are not.

I remember the singer in a band I was in years ago wanting us to go busking

I'll never understand it, surely nobody is povvo enough to be doing it for an income? If you want to perform, go to a decent open Mic night where you can play with other people and be stood on a nice stage instead of in front of a pile of sick outside the British heart foundation.

I would say the majority of musicians are povvo enough to merit busking as a revenue stream. It's the same as art, those with no business skills. Which leads to more selection in venues.

Basically musicians need to up their game and get serious but don't want to due to the faux romanticism and genius associated with the arts which are largely bullshit.

strawberry floating hell, I can't imagine how gooseberry fool it would be to be relying on getting a few quid in today's high street

I can see why you'd do it if you wanted to drum up some interest for a show you were doing that night or something.