Your Sex disasters

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Beans
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PostYour Sex disasters
by Beans » Thu Aug 21, 2008 11:37 am

This thread is inspired by the wanking disasters thread and wondered what disasters people had on here?

I think my biggest disaster was when I was about to come over a girls tits and it ended up in her eye. Lets just say she weren't too happy.

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Hexx
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PostRe: Your Sex disasters
by Hexx » Thu Aug 21, 2008 11:38 am

The time I caught Aids :oops:

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Drunken_Master
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PostRe: Your Sex disasters
by Drunken_Master » Thu Aug 21, 2008 11:39 am

Hexx wrote:The time I caught Aids :oops:


:lol:

Are you gay?

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Hexx
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PostRe: Your Sex disasters
by Hexx » Thu Aug 21, 2008 11:41 am

Drunken_Master wrote:
Hexx wrote:The time I caught Aids :oops:


:lol:

Are you gay?


No, but my boyfriend is.

Serious answer though - sex is always a sticky horrible messy disaster..that's what makes it fun.

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Hexx
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PostRe: Your Sex disasters
by Hexx » Thu Aug 21, 2008 11:51 am

Brerlappins little hat wrote:
Beans wrote:This thread is inspired by the wanking disasters thread and wondered what disasters people had on here?

I think my biggest disaster was when I was about to come over a girls tits and it ended up in her eye. Lets just say she weren't too happy.



o/

i did that too but secretly thought it was strawberry floating classic, closest ive come to giving someone a facial yet :lol:


girls dont like facials?

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Puffin
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PostRe: Your Sex disasters
by Puffin » Thu Aug 21, 2008 12:00 pm

strawberry floating a girl, she was riding me, half way through I decided to put a vibe in her arse and turned it on.

She liked it do I pushed hard with it and she came hard. She got off to discover she had poo'd herself the bed and most importantly, all over my balls.

Moral of the story?

Dont turn vibes on whilst they are in slut's arses.

When Gamers Go Bad!! No. 2!!
captain red dog wrote:At risk of being picky, that isn't the classic Taker. Taker should have grey gloves.
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Cardinal Chunder
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PostRe: Your Sex disasters
by Cardinal Chunder » Thu Aug 21, 2008 12:01 pm

:lol: That's brilliant, Puffin.

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Hexx
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PostRe: Your Sex disasters
by Hexx » Thu Aug 21, 2008 12:04 pm

Puffin wrote:strawberry floating a girl, she was riding me, half way through I decided to put a vibe in her arse and turned it on.

She liked it do I pushed hard with it and she came hard. She got off to discover she had poo'd herself the bed and most importantly, all over my balls.

Moral of the story?

Dont turn vibes on whilst they are in slut's arses.


:lol:

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Alvin Flummux
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PostRe: Your Sex disasters
by Alvin Flummux » Thu Aug 21, 2008 12:14 pm

Puffin wrote:strawberry floating a girl, she was riding me, half way through I decided to put a vibe in her arse and turned it on.

She liked it do I pushed hard with it and she came hard. She got off to discover she had poo'd herself the bed and most importantly, all over my balls.

Moral of the story?

Dont turn vibes on whilst they are in slut's arses.


:shock: :lol:

At least you got hit by it too, so you were both sort of in the same boat.

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Count Nood
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PostRe: Your Sex disasters
by Count Nood » Thu Aug 21, 2008 12:15 pm

Sex, you say? Erm...

The Eeveelution club!!! \o/
The Alchemist Penguin wrote:I want Tales of Vesperia PS3 now. Especially you loveable Patty. :wub:
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Gandalf
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PostRe: Your Sex disasters
by Gandalf » Thu Aug 21, 2008 12:16 pm

Puffin wrote:strawberry floating a girl, she was riding me, half way through I decided to put a vibe in her arse and turned it on.

She liked it do I pushed hard with it and she came hard. She got off to discover she had poo'd herself the bed and most importantly, all over my balls.

Moral of the story?

Dont turn vibes on whilst they are in slut's arses.


I'd say no gooseberry fool, but that's obvioulsy not the case! :lol:

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Puffin
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PostRe: Your Sex disasters
by Puffin » Thu Aug 21, 2008 12:31 pm

I have another..

A girl wanted to do me in the arse with her strap on. She was abit bi and dommy.

I agreed if she was gentle at first and I'm up for a challenage, so she started as I laid face down on the bed, she put one leg on the side of the bed, one on the floor, lubed me up, easied in and rocked slowly.

"Hmmm not too bad." I thought, "not bad at all"....Pfft and woman moan that anal hurts, lying cows"

I even threw a few fake groans for her so she got more into it.

Then her leg slipped off the bed and 7inches of cock shapped plastic shot up my bottom in 0.2 secs.

and...

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When Gamers Go Bad!! No. 2!!
captain red dog wrote:At risk of being picky, that isn't the classic Taker. Taker should have grey gloves.
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Beans
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PostRe: Your Sex disasters
by Beans » Thu Aug 21, 2008 12:32 pm

Puffin wrote:strawberry floating a girl, she was riding me, half way through I decided to put a vibe in her arse and turned it on.

She liked it do I pushed hard with it and she came hard. She got off to discover she had poo'd herself the bed and most importantly, all over my balls.

Moral of the story?

Dont turn vibes on whilst they are in slut's arses.



Ha ha that is brilliant

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Hexx
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PostRe: Your Sex disasters
by Hexx » Thu Aug 21, 2008 12:32 pm

Puffin wrote:I have another..

A girl wanted to do me in the arse with her strap on. She was abit bi and dommy.

I agreed if she was gentle at first and I'm up for a challenage, so she started as I laid face down on the bed, she put one leg on the side of the bed, one on the floor, lubed me up, easied in and rocked slowly.

"Hmmm not too bad." I thought, "not bad at all"....Pfft and woman moan that anal hurts, lying cows"

I even threw a few fake groans for her so she got more into it.

Then her leg slipped off the bed and 7inches of cock shapped plastic shot up my bottom in 0.2 secs.

and...

Image


:lol:

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Count Nood
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PostRe: Your Sex disasters
by Count Nood » Thu Aug 21, 2008 12:32 pm

:lol: :lol:

The Eeveelution club!!! \o/
The Alchemist Penguin wrote:I want Tales of Vesperia PS3 now. Especially you loveable Patty. :wub:
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Mr Yoshi
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PostRe: Your Sex disasters
by Mr Yoshi » Thu Aug 21, 2008 12:33 pm

I had a friend who was doing a girl doggy style, close to an orgasm and accidentally farted incredibly loudly.

Sexy.

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Gandalf
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PostRe: Your Sex disasters
by Gandalf » Thu Aug 21, 2008 12:35 pm

Puffin wrote:I have another..

A girl wanted to do me in the arse with her strap on. She was abit bi and dommy.

I agreed if she was gentle at first and I'm up for a challenage, so she started as I laid face down on the bed, she put one leg on the side of the bed, one on the floor, lubed me up, easied in and rocked slowly.

"Hmmm not too bad." I thought, "not bad at all"....Pfft and woman moan that anal hurts, lying cows"

I even threw a few fake groans for her so she got more into it.

Then her leg slipped off the bed and 7inches of cock shapped plastic shot up my bottom in 0.2 secs.

and...

Image


Your sex life sounds like something out of a Carry On movie! :lol:

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i.mosfet
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PostRe: Your Sex disasters
by i.mosfet » Thu Aug 21, 2008 12:36 pm

Beans wrote:This thread is inspired by the wanking disasters thread and wondered what disasters people had on here?

I think my biggest disaster was when I was about to come over a girls tits and it ended up in her eye. Lets just say she weren't too happy.



Happened to me the very first time I had sex :lol:

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SEP
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PostRe: Your Sex disasters
by SEP » Thu Aug 21, 2008 12:37 pm

My ex-girlfriend had this habit of wanting to change position halfway through, and as a result, I would have to pull out. Goig back in, she would always let out the most house-shaking fanny farts you have ever heard. I'm pretty sure the whole street ended up knowing what we were up to.

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Mini E
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PostRe: Your Sex disasters
by Mini E » Thu Aug 21, 2008 1:17 pm

i think it says a lot about this forum that the wanking thread has 6 pages and the sex thread has 2 :P


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