Bad Joke Thread | Jokes on you, these are great!

Fed up talking videogames? Why?
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Moggy
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PostRe: Bad Joke Friday | Jokes on you, these are great!
by Moggy » Fri Mar 06, 2020 2:58 pm

Why did Liam Gallagher order soup?

Because he got a roll with it

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Blue Eyes
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PostRe: Bad Joke Friday | Jokes on you, these are great!
by Blue Eyes » Fri Apr 03, 2020 4:04 pm

Did you hear that Jonathan ross was thrown out of a rugby match for repeatedly playing pranks on the other spectators. In a statement, the presenter said "i just love twickenham"

Sean connery was doing some diy during lockdown. He built a bookcase but a load of books fell on his head. In a statement, the actor said "I blame my shelf"

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Choclet-Milk
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PostRe: Bad Joke Friday | Jokes on you, these are great!
by Choclet-Milk » Fri Apr 03, 2020 4:17 pm

One for the current climate:

I saw Paul Chuckle in big Tesco's yesterday, but when I approached him for an autograph, he said "Oi!"

"Two metre, you."

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Curls
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PostRe: Bad Joke Friday | Jokes on you, these are great!
by Curls » Fri Apr 03, 2020 9:08 pm

Blue Eyes wrote:Did you hear that Jonathan ross was thrown out of a rugby match for repeatedly playing pranks on the other spectators. In a statement, the presenter said "i just love twickenham"


I love the Sean Connery one but I cannot for the life of me figure out the joke in this even with Wossy's lisp.

Corazon de Leon

PostRe: Bad Joke Friday | Jokes on you, these are great!
by Corazon de Leon » Fri Apr 03, 2020 9:16 pm

Curls wrote:
Blue Eyes wrote:Did you hear that Jonathan ross was thrown out of a rugby match for repeatedly playing pranks on the other spectators. In a statement, the presenter said "i just love twickenham"


I love the Sean Connery one but I cannot for the life of me figure out the joke in this even with Wossy's lisp.


I just love tricking 'em.

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Curls
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PostRe: Bad Joke Friday | Jokes on you, these are great!
by Curls » Fri Apr 03, 2020 9:20 pm

Corazon de Leon wrote:
Curls wrote:
Blue Eyes wrote:Did you hear that Jonathan ross was thrown out of a rugby match for repeatedly playing pranks on the other spectators. In a statement, the presenter said "i just love twickenham"


I love the Sean Connery one but I cannot for the life of me figure out the joke in this even with Wossy's lisp.


I just love tricking 'em.



OHHHHHHHHHH. Derpy de derp :oops:

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Zilnad
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PostRe: Bad Joke Friday | Jokes on you, these are great!
by Zilnad » Sat Apr 04, 2020 3:49 pm

What do you call a German with an artistic block?

Kunstipated

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Kezzer
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PostRe: Bad Joke Friday | Jokes on you, these are great!
by Kezzer » Fri Nov 27, 2020 5:20 pm

I got sacked from my job at the bank today. An old lady came in and asked me to check her balance so I pushed her over.

This post is exempt from the No Context Thread.

Tomous wrote:Tell him to take his fake reality out of your virtual reality and strawberry float off


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Alvin Flummux
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PostRe: Bad Joke Friday | Jokes on you, these are great!
by Alvin Flummux » Fri Nov 27, 2020 6:46 pm

Why were the Mongols always so calm?

They were nomads.

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Kezzer
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PostRe: Bad Joke Monday| Jokes on you, these are great!
by Kezzer » Mon Sep 06, 2021 4:37 pm

Who was the inventor of the round table?

Sir Cumference

This post is exempt from the No Context Thread.

Tomous wrote:Tell him to take his fake reality out of your virtual reality and strawberry float off


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rinks
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PostRe: Bad Joke Monday| Jokes on you, these are great!
by rinks » Mon Sep 06, 2021 4:47 pm

I guess she's really going to know the sound of the underground now.

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Finiarél
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PostRe: Bad Joke Monday| Jokes on you, these are great!
by Finiarél » Mon Sep 06, 2021 5:22 pm

Jesus strawberry floating Christ

glowy69 wrote:Being from the hood won't save you from an alien mate.
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Zilnad
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PostRe: Bad Joke Monday| Jokes on you, these are great!
by Zilnad » Mon Sep 06, 2021 5:37 pm

What's a golfer's favourite drink?

Tea/tee

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Rex Kramer
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PostRe: Bad Joke Monday| Jokes on you, these are great!
by Rex Kramer » Mon Sep 06, 2021 5:39 pm

What goes from green to red at the press of a button

A frog in a blender

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Kezzer
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PostRe: Bad Joke Monday| Jokes on you, these are great!
by Kezzer » Mon Sep 06, 2021 8:41 pm

I recently took a pole and found that 100% of people in the tent were angry.

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Tomous wrote:Tell him to take his fake reality out of your virtual reality and strawberry float off


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DML
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PostRe: Bad Joke Monday| Jokes on you, these are great!
by DML » Mon Sep 06, 2021 10:10 pm

Whats worse then a worm in your apple?

Rape.

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Skarjo
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PostRe: Bad Joke Monday| Jokes on you, these are great!
by Skarjo » Tue Sep 07, 2021 1:37 am

rinks wrote:I guess she's really going to know the sound of the underground now.


....Jesus, man.

Karl wrote:Can't believe I got baited into expressing a political stance on hentai

Skarjo's Scary Stories...
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Oblomov Boblomov
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PostRe: Bad Joke Monday| Jokes on you, these are great!
by Oblomov Boblomov » Tue Sep 07, 2021 8:47 am

Why have we gone from traditional bad jokes to just pure darkness :dread:.

Did laugh at the Sound of the Underground one though :shifty:.

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Zilnad
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PostRe: Bad Joke Monday| Jokes on you, these are great!
by Zilnad » Tue Sep 07, 2021 9:17 pm

What's green and smells?

The Incredible Hulk's guff

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Tomous
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PostRe: Bad Joke Monday| Jokes on you, these are great!
by Tomous » Tue Sep 07, 2021 9:41 pm

Who is the coolest person in the hospital?

the ultrasound guy


Who stands in for him when he can't make it?

the hip replacement guy


:toot:

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