Depression, Anxiety, or other Mental Health Conditions

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Octoroc
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PostRe: Depression, Anxiety, or other Mental Health Conditions
by Octoroc » Sun Aug 26, 2018 9:50 am

Oblomov Boblomov wrote:[

I'm not in work until Thursday, which usually encourages me to drink even more. I'm going to try and not touch the stuff until next weekend and see how I get on.



David Bowie wrote:Time and again I tell myself, 'I'll stay clean tonight', but the the little green wheels are firing me. Oh no not again.


That's good dude, but be realistic and if you do have a drink don't feel like a failure and give up. It sounds to me as though you need to find some activity that precludes drinking.

Tough times, but there's still a way out.

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Minoru
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PostRe: Depression, Anxiety, or other Mental Health Conditions
by Minoru » Thu Aug 30, 2018 10:52 pm

I seriously need some help. I get panic attacks from the thought of basic social interaction (got to ring the dentist? Panic attack. Got to ask directions? Panic attack. Want to try a hobby like D&D or something productive like volunteering? Panic attack). In addition to that, the situation with my family is putting a constant strain on my emotions and I feel guilty, sad and lonely all the time. I really can't continue to live like this. My parents aren't particularly supportive of me seeing a doctor and that's hard enough to do if they were pushing me towards it. I just don't know what to do. I need space I can't get and help I can't face getting. I feel totally trapped and hopeless.

I don't even know why I'm posting, really, because the answer is clearly 'suck it up, go see a doctor and hope they can help', I'm just really, really tired of everything and I have nothing good in my life right now.

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PostRe: Depression, Anxiety, or other Mental Health Conditions
by Xmasday » Thu Aug 30, 2018 11:30 pm

Min, you're doing your best. Going to the doctor may be the best thing to do, but remember, it's your decision what to do, not your parents. You're the one that feels this way, and having to cope with panic attacks, not them. You're in charge here, and that's important.

The doctors may try to push tablets on you, remember that therapy is an option too and that you dont have to take the tablets if you think and feel that therapy may be the better option.

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Minoru
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PostRe: Depression, Anxiety, or other Mental Health Conditions
by Minoru » Fri Aug 31, 2018 12:50 am

I don't know what I want. I'm terrified of going to the doctor. I'm terrified of opening up to someone, I'm terrified that it won't help and I'll have no options left, I'm terrified that a diagnosis is going to ruin my future (my cousin had to adopt her granddaughter and social services gave them trouble over antidepressants she takes for migraines. I want kids someday and I don't want to lose that option).

I never wanted to need medication but I'm really desperate and if it can relieve some of these feelings, that's all I want, because I genuinely don't know how long I can continue to live like this. I just want to be able to live like a normal, functional person.

It's like the last 2 month have been a constant stress, never able to rest and catch my breath. I can't cope with my parents issues with my sexuality at the same time as my anxiety and depression and they've both come about at once. I feel like the only people I have in my life, hate something about me I can't even change and that makes it so much harder to let them help support me in everything else, because all I want right now is space I have no way of getting.

My head is so messed up and confused and scared right now and I just really want it to stop.

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PostRe: Depression, Anxiety, or other Mental Health Conditions
by Karl_ » Fri Aug 31, 2018 2:20 am

I'm really sorry Minoru. It sounds like you're in a lot of emotional pain right now, and I wish we could help beyond just offering kind of vague Internet support.

It sounds to me like you could benefit from a doctor's visit in any combination of four ways:
1. Arranging talking therapy via the NHS;
2. The prescription of something like venlafaxine for generalised anxiety disorder [N.B. I am not a clinician and I am not diagnosing you];
3. Something like propranolol for panic attacks [again, not a clinician];
4. You would get some kind of formal diagnosis, which might underscore the need for your family to take you seriously and support you.

I don't know anything about adoption, but I can't imagine "was once on antianxiety medication" would be justification to deem you unfit. I'm not an expert, but I speculate that a bigger issue might be if you were going through the adoption process one day without having tackled these problems -- that might put up some roadblocks.

So I don't think this would ruin your future, and I feel it might help a lot in the present. I really don't think you have anything to lose by making an appointment.

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Green Gecko
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PostRe: Depression, Anxiety, or other Mental Health Conditions
by Green Gecko » Fri Aug 31, 2018 2:54 am

My friend suffered from anxiety attacks and panic attacks about a lot of relatively ordinary social things, including going to unversity. After graduating with a first class anyway as he did almost all his work at home (even the electronics) he eventually sought private therapy that worked better for him because he had full control over the engagement, but the point is therapy worked. He finally moved out of home which was a massive step (somewhat forced by house sale) and now has a girlfriend and a job. Beforehand he turned down a lot of opportunities and wouldn't go out and struggled to talk to people like writing emails to professors. He was also prescribed propranolol (beta blockers) to help with the anxiety attacks when needed.

My psychiatrist several years ago now also prescribed a mild anti psychotic which is useful as a sleep aid and to help with anxiety attacks of the kind I experience when combined with SSRI anti depressants.

Although I initially declined medication some 10 years ago now because I was worried about that, they have helped me. At the time I had to accept strong tranquilisers (zopiclone) anyway just to sleep as I was losing my mind. The clinical basis for SSRIs is very good, including treatment for mild anxiety (I can't remember which you are supposed to treat first, the anxiety or the depression but I think untreated anxiety usually leads to depression).

It sounds like you're in a situation of kind of breaking point of the kind I had at various stages of seeking treatment, all of which helped at least a bit. Do you have anyone at all even not your family who can accompany you to the doctor? Or can you arrange a telephone appointment to discuss your symptoms in confidence with a GP without having to physically go?

In your local area there should be an NHS body to which you can also self refer for support, on the Internet. What county or borough are you in? Before receiving talking therapy, you will have to see someone face to face though.

I would also suggest looking at some mindfulness meditation and breathing exercises on YouTube. It really can help a lot. Very small things like focusing on your breath to connect you to the physical a bit more and take focus away from the rapid over thinking. I can share some paid ones on Dropbox if that helps that are really good.

I'm sorry you're this situation with your family when I was struggling to even understand my health problems never mind have my parents notice or do anything about them. Which was deeply ironic considering my mum worked in mental health, and my father - a neuroscientist - was useless, I couldn't even talk to him about it. Things are much better now but especially if you're young these things don't seem to be taken seriously because haven't you got it good best time your life blah blah well sometime it bloody isn't. I do sympathise, but the health system doesn't descriminate. I think it's important to take charge of your own health. It really doesn't matter what other people think. If I hadn't done, if I hadn't at least started looking into what might be the problem, I most probably wouldn't be here. So it's a start.

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Minoru
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PostRe: Depression, Anxiety, or other Mental Health Conditions
by Minoru » Fri Aug 31, 2018 3:14 pm

Gecko, your friend's situation sounds very similar. I've been studying through OU because I couldn't face real uni and dropped out like twice - I'm 26 so not that young, I've just wasted half my life avoiding everything and my family have enabled that terribly (well meaning but it's made things worse over time). I'm glad things got better for him.

I am really scared that therapy won't help much or medication will just make things worse, but I'm definitely at a point where I just can't continue like this and I need to somehow find the strength to do something about it. I'm pretty throughly isolated, I don't have anyone I could go with except my parents, and frankly I'd rather go alone. I've been looking at talking to someone with Mind first as some sort of step before going to the doctor, but I can also look at the self referral you mentioned, I suppose. I guess I just need to try something as a first step and stop over thinking it and terrifying myself.

I've tried some exercises and stuff online before, to little success, but if you have some paid stuff I could check it out in case it helps any better?

You're right of course, that I need to start dealing with it myself, because my parents are useless with mental health and it really is up to me to help myself. It's just very difficult because I live with them and I'm used to them helping with everything and right now we've been arguing a lot as a result of me coming out, everything I do is basically 'well you weren't this unhappy before you were gay' when I'm feeling worse because I'm trying to stop ignoring things (and okay yeah, coming out has agrivated things because I feel like gooseberry fool about my sexuality and how they've reacted to it, when it was supposed to be a part of my not ignoring things anymore, but that's only one part of the problem).

Sorry, I'm rambling, I feel stupid posting such personal stuff to a forum, I just don't have a better outlet right now.

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Festivus Maximus
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PostRe: Depression, Anxiety, or other Mental Health Conditions
by Festivus Maximus » Fri Aug 31, 2018 3:27 pm

Minoru wrote:Sorry, I'm rambling, I feel stupid posting such personal stuff to a forum, I just don't have a better outlet right now.

GRcade is a great outlet for stuff like this, dude. It's often easier (and more cathartic) to vent to strangers than it is to people you know.

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I Shot A Kid
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PostRe: Depression, Anxiety, or other Mental Health Conditions
by I Shot A Kid » Sat Sep 01, 2018 3:00 pm

Brerlappin wrote:
Oblomov Boblomov wrote:
Rocsteady wrote:That sucks man. I had in the past. I developed a liver disease a few years ago which means that anymore than a couple nowadays starts to hurt too much though, which curtailed that.

How often are you drinking alone? Is it effecting your day to day life?

I drank every single day for over a year as an escape, going up to about a litre of rum in a single night (but normally ‘just’ 4-8 beers). I knew I was depressed but never thought about seeing anyone for the alcohol aspect. I don’t really have any great suggestions tbh, I’d kicked it for a while then was drinking extremely heavily the last couple of months before my liver disease as I was in a very depressed mind state.

Drop me a pm if you ever want to chat about gooseberry fool.

Thanks Ian.

I don't really think there's anything wrong. I'm not sure why the doctor thinks I'm depressed, it could just be because of how regularly I drink and they want to explore the possibility. I've binned the letter and don't plan on making an appointment.

I sort of expected my drinking habits to change when I moved out of the city, as I'm not in walking distance of so many bars and more importantly my friends, whereas I seem to just be drinking alone instead.

I'm not in work until Thursday, which usually encourages me to drink even more. I'm going to try and not touch the stuff until next weekend and see how I get on.

I am married, Falsey. My wife rarely drinks so I'll just be chugging away while she's having squash, she'll go to bed early and I'll stay up on my own and continue to drink.

Thanks for the support guys. I'll be alright, just as soon as this hangover clears up!


Its a hard thing to really admit to yourself but honestly man drinking that much does sound like a problem. You might not be getting blackout drunk, but drinking that much per week is not only bad for your health but its bad for your mental health and relationships too. Do you not think your wife might be happier if you went to bed with her, have some pillow talk, hell maybe even sex if youre feeling wild, instead of going to bed alone while you drink?
I say this as someone who kinda inadvertently found myself drinking quite a strawberry floating lot without really realizing it. Like i would be getting proper soused about 5 times a week, but on the face of it i was like "ah its normal", cause id go out with my Dad on a tuesday and get fairly well oiled, Wednesday with a mate fo mine and get properly rat arsed, Friday night was beers at home and videogames, again, pretty wobbly by the end of the night, Saturday again id hang out with a mate and get pissed, sunday drink to stave off the fear of monday mornings. It was really only after i got married i realized how much i drank and how it affected my relationship with my wife that i was like yeah, maybe being pissed 5/7ths of the week isnt such a hot idea :lol:

All i know is i barely drink now (my weekly intake is 4 of those tiny bottles of Leffe, 2 on a saturday night and 2 on sunday and thats it), and i feel way better physically and mentally for it and the last time my wife got pissed at me for saying stupid gooseberry fool while drunk is now 6 years ago :lol: I actually dread the thoughts of being hungover so much now that i go out of my way to avoid being drunk. Hell we had a social with free beer in work yesterday, i went home at 5:30 on the dot without taking a drop.

You're totally right and I agree, which is why I'm going to try and put a stop to it.

I managed to not have a drink until last night and I got home just after 11 then went straight to bed, so this week has gone pretty well! It was tough trying to drink water/Coke and ignore the thirsty sensation that I knew could only be quenched by alcohol, but that had dulled by around Wednesday evening so was much easier to handle. I'm actually getting a craving right now but it's not too bad. Will probably get a lot stronger as we approach the evening.

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No:1 Final Fantasy Fan
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PostRe: Depression, Anxiety, or other Mental Health Conditions
by No:1 Final Fantasy Fan » Thu Sep 06, 2018 5:56 pm

Someone I kind of know has got anorexia. Its awful to see this happen to a young healthy happy person. I only know of her from the cafe I used to frequent as she worked there. But I suddenly noticed her getting thinner each time I visited. I thought she was getting better at one point as she seemed to have gained weight. Haven't seen her in like a year...think she quit her job.

But the other day I saw her in town and she was the thinnest I have ever seen...scarily thin it was so sad to see. I didn't approach...wouldn't know what to say really cos I was so shocked. It was awful. If I see her again I will be sure to say hi and ask hows she doing.

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Rudolphin
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PostRe: Depression, Anxiety, or other Mental Health Conditions
by Rudolphin » Wed Sep 12, 2018 10:44 am

Got my first appointment with a proper psychiatrist today.

I've had counselling before but I assume this is something different. I've had a stressful year, moving to a foreign country, giving up a steady pay-check to go freelance etc etc and the last few weeks have been a real down period as a plethora of differing strands have come together to create one giant cloud over everything.

Hopefully it'll help. It's too expensive to turn into a regular thing, but I'm interested in seeing how it goes.

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Sandy
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PostRe: Depression, Anxiety, or other Mental Health Conditions
by Sandy » Wed Sep 12, 2018 10:47 am

Which country did you move to?

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Hime
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PostRe: Depression, Anxiety, or other Mental Health Conditions
by Hime » Wed Sep 12, 2018 1:37 pm

Tafdolphin wrote:Got my first appointment with a proper psychiatrist today.

I've had counselling before but I assume this is something different. I've had a stressful year, moving to a foreign country, giving up a steady pay-check to go freelance etc etc and the last few weeks have been a real down period as a plethora of differing strands have come together to create one giant cloud over everything.

Hopefully it'll help. It's too expensive to turn into a regular thing, but I'm interested in seeing how it goes.

You always seem like you've really got your gooseberry fool together so it's really surprising to see that you would require that kind of treatment. I hope it helps and can get through it though mate.

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PostRe: Depression, Anxiety, or other Mental Health Conditions
by Rudolphin » Wed Sep 12, 2018 1:54 pm

Hime wrote:
Tafdolphin wrote:Got my first appointment with a proper psychiatrist today.

I've had counselling before but I assume this is something different. I've had a stressful year, moving to a foreign country, giving up a steady pay-check to go freelance etc etc and the last few weeks have been a real down period as a plethora of differing strands have come together to create one giant cloud over everything.

Hopefully it'll help. It's too expensive to turn into a regular thing, but I'm interested in seeing how it goes.

You always seem like you've really got your gooseberry fool together so it's really surprising to see that you would require that kind of treatment. I hope it helps and can get through it though mate.


Ha, thanks and I'll take that as a compliment!

Yeah, I've been struggling with quite a few things recently, mainly job stuff. As I say, it's all come to a head so, you know, fingers crossed.

Sandy wrote:Which country did you move to?


France!

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Festivus Maximus
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PostRe: Depression, Anxiety, or other Mental Health Conditions
by Festivus Maximus » Wed Sep 12, 2018 4:06 pm

Hopefully he can diagnose why you seem intent on dying on the "TLJ is a good movie" hill ;)

But seriously, hope it goes well.

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Green Gecko
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PostRe: Depression, Anxiety, or other Mental Health Conditions
by Green Gecko » Thu Sep 13, 2018 2:00 am

I've been put forward for some talking therapy again, after my first consultation, as I'm convinced I still have some form of trauma. Finally seemed to accept my family breakup when I was very little might actually be worth addressing for once as well as some abusive employments, as to whether I considered it traumatic, not them or some made up definition of what should or should not be traumatic to a "normal" person. (Which is what happened last time, I didn't even get to the psychologist). I "fixed" one such shitty employment by getting an apology from HR assistant director after emailing my story and complaint to about 10 members of senior staff, after I was struck off the staff register for basically no reason. I still have unwanted, anxiety ridden thoughts about the first one, mostly when I eat lunch, which sucks.

Have to wait a month now just to ask more questions, and write up my family history / traumas again.

And some other gooseberry fool involving me with the police as a witness has dragged itself to my front door, which is about the worst strawberry floating thing I could have to deal with right now. I have to do an on camera interview at the headquarters which makes me sick to the stomach and I haven't been sleeping properly. I'm now suffering headaches and confusion all day, even with painkillers.

I've been given strict instructions to take my mood stabilisers/tranquilisers again, which basically prevent my brain from operating properly and strawberry float my creativity, turning me into a half functioning vegetable.

Fun times.

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Green Gecko
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PostRe: Depression, Anxiety, or other Mental Health Conditions
by Green Gecko » Thu Sep 13, 2018 2:02 am

Tafdolphin wrote:Got my first appointment with a proper psychiatrist today.

I've had counselling before but I assume this is something different. I've had a stressful year, moving to a foreign country, giving up a steady pay-check to go freelance etc etc and the last few weeks have been a real down period as a plethora of differing strands have come together to create one giant cloud over everything.

Hopefully it'll help. It's too expensive to turn into a regular thing, but I'm interested in seeing how it goes.

A psychiatrist generally prescribes medication, or do you mean psychologist as well?

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PostRe: Depression, Anxiety, or other Mental Health Conditions
by Rudolphin » Thu Sep 13, 2018 7:07 am

Green Gecko wrote:
Tafdolphin wrote:Got my first appointment with a proper psychiatrist today.

I've had counselling before but I assume this is something different. I've had a stressful year, moving to a foreign country, giving up a steady pay-check to go freelance etc etc and the last few weeks have been a real down period as a plethora of differing strands have come together to create one giant cloud over everything.

Hopefully it'll help. It's too expensive to turn into a regular thing, but I'm interested in seeing how it goes.

A psychiatrist generally prescribes medication, or do you mean psychologist as well?


I think I meant psychologist. Tbh I have no idea what the difference is. Went pretty well either way. I'd love to turn it into a monthly thing, I came away feeling genuinely lighter, but it's too expensive.

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Sandy
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PostRe: Depression, Anxiety, or other Mental Health Conditions
by Sandy » Thu Sep 13, 2018 11:17 am

Psychiatrist is a doctor, psychologist is not.

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Rudolphin
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PostRe: Depression, Anxiety, or other Mental Health Conditions
by Rudolphin » Mon Sep 24, 2018 10:45 am

Not doing so well again, after a decent period of calm after my trip to the psych.

I've really struggled to motivate myself to find work since I moved to France. This morning, I actually started looking and there's simply nothing out there for people with less than fluent French, except babysitting and teaching. Even the teaching stuff, which I absolutely don't want to do, is underpaid student type work. Everything feels like a step backwards. The writing stuff has slowed to a crawl, a few projects I was sure were goers have disappeared without a trace.

I just feel totally alone out here. Alone and useless with an unknown future ahead. I have no idea what I'm doing anymore.

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