Depression, Anxiety, or other Mental Health Conditions

Mr. Sis Boom Bah wrote:

Green Gecko wrote:The letter actually states not to provide any information that I have provided before, so filling it out along the lines of "Nothing has changed" is not exactly a great look. Hell, even I would try to get that rejected.

thats part of the con. they just want to discourage you from describing your worst case scenarios so that you're nervous and equivocate about your lived experience, because that gives them the opportunity to pick holes in your story that you would otherwise deny them with the simple truth.

just repeat yourself in all the necessary detail each & every time, and if they find that "inconvenient", you've got the start of your case to appeal a decision against you, based on the inconvenience they're causing you on the strength of precisely what you told them and no more or less. scan or photograph your application before it disappears into the ether so you can perfectly recall & retell exactly what you wrote if it ever comes into dispute.

source: recently reapplied for PIP

Thanks for the advice mate. Unfortunately I don't have the original letter which was written by a charity specific to me and they accepted it no question, including slews of medical and psychologist evidence so I can't parrot it but I will try my best to infer what was put in there obviously knowing my own condition based on the original decision/award letter (which was still pretty harsh as apparently knowing anything about a condition defined by virtually all medical practitioners is not enough evidence that you struggle with something, despite having that diagnosis in black and white from the NHS).

It's a pain because I have to print and send them all that stuff again, my diagnoses including learning difficulty stuff are largely from 2011-2012 period but obviously nothing has changed. So I saw that part and just immediately thought, "well thanks for the suggestion but like strawberry float am I opening up to that line of questioning, seeing as half the gooseberry fool was originally denounced with "no evidence" whereas a load of stuff that cannot feasibly be "evidenced" was accepted as fact, which doesn't make much sense).

There are loads of inconsistencies in the process, for example to provide information about any medication you are on, but to not provide repeat prescription slips. How the strawberry float do you provide evidence of your medication, then?

Further, what happens if for some reason you don't take medication or the medication you do take has nothing to do with your disability? In my opinion certain neurodivergences shouldn't be overly medicated exactly because its society that needs to change, not for disabled people to un-disable themselves with psychoactive drugs.

I hope I don't show up to one of those strawberry floating assessments, which sound like a nightmare. Thankfully I did not have to.

There's also basic anxieties built into the form, like you get literally two strawberry floating centimetres of space to write about gooseberry fool that cripples your entire life on a regular basis. There isn't even a suggestion to continue onto additional pages as necessary. So of course some people won't do that and obviously it's not that big a deal, then. No, that's just how your shitty forms are designed.

The awards seem to be actually made on the basis of how likely they are to be upheld on appeal, rather than genuine concern for helping anyone. The case worker who helped me before said that, in their experience, most of their application come back rejected, and 90% of them are successful on appeal. There's literally a systematic effort by the DWP to turn down as many applications as possible even when they know they will lose if it goes to an appeal.

False wrote:

Green Gecko wrote:I'm still perfectly lucid, I just feel estranged from my body like, what the strawberry float are hands man, in this me, who am I really etc.

this, I feel like I float outside and above my body - its a physical sensation and I can feel myself exit through the top of my head

also I had a full on mental breakdown this weekend

found out my ex has been finding out who Ive been seeing, god knows how, and telling them Im all diseased and gooseberry fool

That's actually disgusting, I seem to have got off easy with my ex just pretending I don't exist. Sorry you're having to deal with that.

I've recently started hearing voices in my head, not the "telling me what to do" kind, but maybe once a day I will have a 15-20 minute period where my brain just imagines all the people in my life just talking, nothing is comprehensible, it's like they're all talking at once or just talking gibberish.

It's only seem to have started since I've been on meds again, I wasn't sure if it was because of them or a symptom of something else.

I'm getting really anxious about both being off work again and going back to work. I've been ill the last 7 days and while I feel a bit better now I'm still not 100% and I keep coughing up mucus. I think it's just a viral infection like I've had hundreds of times before and today when I was getting ready to go to work I coughed up again and started panicking.

I've called in sick again and I feel awful, this is my 5th day off sick in a row and I'm worried it's going to end up causing me problems, but I also can't go in like this, because when I cough the stuff up it makes me feel like gooseberry fool. I just want to be better again, but if it's like last times doctors can't give you anything as it's a virus and im already taking everything they suggested before.

EDIT: Called the Doctor and they've given me other stuff to do, but unfortunately he said as it's a viral infection other than waiting it out I can't really do anything bar Steam Inhalation to try and ease it out. Spoke to work and they said I'd need to get a doctors note, so went back to the doctors surgery and they said I'd need to self cert so I'm asking if that's ok.

Hopefully it won't affect my pay too much.

Check this mad experience I had the other day.

I've had a pretty downer couple of years, ongoing issues with work, rough patches relationship wise etc

So, I'm laid in bed the other night and instead of falling asleep, my brain decided to visualise all that gooseberry fool in what felt just like a bad trip. Like, it was a super intense, quick explosion of colour and imagery. Pretty sure I was half asleep and having some kind of strawberry floated up daydream, but man it was intense. Seemed to come with other trippy gooseberry fool too, ie, the washing machine was on downstairs and I started seeing spirals conjured from the sound of it spinning.

Anyone else dealt with stuff like this?

Sounds like you are overstimulated and anxious, and yeah some kind of strange daydream in between sleep states. Look up intrusive thoughts. Do you have any creative background? It might just be your imagination triggering off. When we get anxious our amigdila overloads with adrenaline and can cause us to become spectacularly sensitive to almost anything, and if you are trying the sleep the brain probably gets confused trying to dream that somehow. I wouldn't worry about it, I experience similar things pretty regularly especially when I am stressed and have a lot going on at that moment. It's sort of my brains way of expressing frustration and flushing out too much sensory information and trying to structure all the worries in some kind of weird construct. Ultimately it fails as it doesn't make much sense. It might be a good idea to write such experiences down, you might find it helpful to have an outlet like writing or poems or just telling someone else about your experience.

Qikz wrote:I'm getting really anxious about both being off work again and going back to work. I've been ill the last 7 days and while I feel a bit better now I'm still not 100% and I keep coughing up mucus. I think it's just a viral infection like I've had hundreds of times before and today when I was getting ready to go to work I coughed up again and started panicking.

I've called in sick again and I feel awful, this is my 5th day off sick in a row and I'm worried it's going to end up causing me problems, but I also can't go in like this, because when I cough the stuff up it makes me feel like gooseberry fool. I just want to be better again, but if it's like last times doctors can't give you anything as it's a virus and im already taking everything they suggested before.

EDIT: Called the Doctor and they've given me other stuff to do, but unfortunately he said as it's a viral infection other than waiting it out I can't really do anything bar Steam Inhalation to try and ease it out. Spoke to work and they said I'd need to get a doctors note, so went back to the doctors surgery and they said I'd need to self cert so I'm asking if that's ok.

Hopefully it won't affect my pay too much.

About the statutory sick pay, signing off thing, they are only asking for the note for legal reasons to pay the sick pay. I don't think from what you've spoken about before and they know you just get ill sometimes the company will punish you as you work very hard. You can go off sick for 4 consecutive days, including weekends, without any kind of document, in this situation the company should pay you sick pay if determined in your contract. After four days, you need a note from the doctor to say you are ill, so that your employer can claim statutory sick pay benefit, and add it to your payroll. That is all they are asking for. If the GP wouldn't give it to you, well, what can you do.

https://www.gov.uk/employers-sick-pay/e ... -form-ssp1

There is nothing wrong with being sick. If you don't take time off sick then your performance could adversely impact things and make you more ill, while putting other productivity at risk. This isn't your fault, it's just the way things are. Bear in mind there is probably an underlying element of anxiety here. You are far more likely to contract a virus if you are also suffering the impact of stress on your immune system, which demonstrably becomes less effective. So, if you are anxious as well as ill from a bug, then you are still ill and that's ok. Give your body including your brain the time it needs to recover. If you are feeling anxious because you are not working, then see if you can maybe do some tasks at home so that you don't feel so guilty, but remember you are supposed to be resting and that could make things worse.

It seems you are also like me and didn't take holiday as often as you should. Your employer will know this. It's usually pretty obvious by personality those that are taking advantage. If they felt that way about you then things would already be different. Get well soon mate!

Green Gecko wrote:

Qikz wrote:I'm getting really anxious about both being off work again and going back to work. I've been ill the last 7 days and while I feel a bit better now I'm still not 100% and I keep coughing up mucus. I think it's just a viral infection like I've had hundreds of times before and today when I was getting ready to go to work I coughed up again and started panicking.

I've called in sick again and I feel awful, this is my 5th day off sick in a row and I'm worried it's going to end up causing me problems, but I also can't go in like this, because when I cough the stuff up it makes me feel like gooseberry fool. I just want to be better again, but if it's like last times doctors can't give you anything as it's a virus and im already taking everything they suggested before.

EDIT: Called the Doctor and they've given me other stuff to do, but unfortunately he said as it's a viral infection other than waiting it out I can't really do anything bar Steam Inhalation to try and ease it out. Spoke to work and they said I'd need to get a doctors note, so went back to the doctors surgery and they said I'd need to self cert so I'm asking if that's ok.

Hopefully it won't affect my pay too much.

About the statutory sick pay, signing off thing, they are only asking for the note for legal reasons to pay the sick pay. I don't think from what you've spoken about before and they know you just get ill sometimes the company will punish you as you work very hard. You can go off sick for 4 consecutive days, including weekends, without any kind of document, in this situation the company should pay you sick pay if determined in your contract. After four days, you need a note from the doctor to say you are ill, so that your employer can claim statutory sick pay benefit, and add it to your payroll. That is all they are asking for. If the GP wouldn't give it to you, well, what can you do.

https://www.gov.uk/employers-sick-pay/e ... -form-ssp1

There is nothing wrong with being sick. If you don't take time off sick then your performance could adversely impact things and make you more ill, while putting other productivity at risk. This isn't your fault, it's just the way things are. Bear in mind there is probably an underlying element of anxiety here. You are far more likely to contract a virus if you are also suffering the impact of stress on your immune system, which demonstrably becomes less effective. So, if you are anxious as well as ill from a bug, then you are still ill and that's ok. Give your body including your brain the time it needs to recover. If you are feeling anxious because you are not working, then see if you can maybe do some tasks at home so that you don't feel so guilty, but remember you are supposed to be resting and that could make things worse.

It seems you are also like me and didn't take holiday as often as you should. Your employer will know this. It's usually pretty obvious by personality those that are taking advantage. If they felt that way about you then things would already be different. Get well soon mate!

I'm going back tomorrow, going to print off that SSP form at work and fill it in as I don't have a printer.

I think I just panicked this morning, I missed my alarms so I would've been late to work anyway and I think I the coughing gave me an excuse to call in again. I'm going to wake up earlier tomorrow to get everything out of my system and give myself ample time to kinda psyche myself up for going to work as even though I know I'll likely be fine, I think I'm still very slightly worried about going back.

Good thing is I don't need a doctors note and they've never docked my pay for being off sick before (although last time it was for 4 days rather than 5) so im sure I'll be ok.

Green Gecko wrote:Sounds like you are overstimulated and anxious, and yeah some kind of strange daydream in between sleep states. Look up intrusive thoughts. Do you have any creative background? It might just be your imagination triggering off. When we get anxious our amigdila overloads with adrenaline and can cause us to become spectacularly sensitive to almost anything, and if you are trying the sleep the brain probably gets confused trying to dream that somehow. I wouldn't worry about it, I experience similar things pretty regularly especially when I am stressed and have a lot going on at that moment. It's sort of my brains way of expressing frustration and flushing out too much sensory information and trying to structure all the worries in some kind of weird construct. Ultimately it fails as it doesn't make much sense. It might be a good idea to write such experiences down, you might find it helpful to have an outlet like writing or poems or just telling someone else about your experience.

See, my problem is generally the opposite - apathy, a lack of motivation and definitely no creativity.

However, I did have a particular event a few nights previous which brought me the closer to what I imagine is an anxiety attack than I have ever experienced. Maybe I was just making sense of that.

Well damn, I pretty much just anxiet-ied the strawberry float out over money issues and asked if it was possible to get the inheritance I never received to help grow my business or I basically give up. I've only ever written simultaneously to "mum & dad" (my parents separated age 5) once before when I slipped down the stairs and fractured my spine and wasn't sure if there would be any lasting damage.

If I don't make something worthwhile over the X-mas period, I'm pretty close to folding the whole thing but then that money selling off assets would last what 60 days and I'd be back to square zero after 5 years. Sigh.

Green Gecko wrote:Well damn, I pretty much just anxiet-ied the strawberry float out over money issues and asked if it was possible to get the inheritance I never received to help grow my business or I basically give up. I've only ever written simultaneously to "mum & dad" (my parents separated age 5) once before when I slipped down the stairs and fractured my spine and wasn't sure if there would be any lasting damage.

If I don't make something worthwhile over the X-mas period, I'm pretty close to folding the whole thing but then that money selling off assets would last what 60 days and I'd be back to square zero after 5 years. Sigh.

Ah man, I'm sorry I can't even imagine the stress and pressure of managing your own business, let alone maintaining it during tough times.

Regardless of what happens, it took an immense amount of drive, confidence and skill to get where you are, never diminish what an accomplishment that was.

Thank you man.

It's been really difficult communiting with my parents about this episode. My mum couldn't hug me even when I was sobbing on the paving slabs of our patio garden in a wreck, just shouting "What are you doing?" It's incredible how dumb my parents can be. You don't do depression to yourself. All my dad can do is literally say, "Do you want the money or not?" No comment on my suicidal ideation or low mood or any of our family issue that tend to bubble back up at times like this.

I have a handful of enquiries and orders to deal with, I am trying to ignore the thoughts and push on through but it's also the right thing that I self-refer to the NHS again, although it never seems to get me in front of a psychologist despite my significant history of being churned through the system over and over again with very limited results.

If do I manage to come into some money in 2020 I'm going to invest it in some more business training that will net me a semi-automated system for actually getting clients that can pay the bills, something that can work for me without manually being glued to the Internet writing sales all day, every day, (something I can follow at my own pace - the course I'm looking at takes 90 days but costs about $100 a month...) and pay for occupational therapy to get it reimbursed by Access to Work (DWP).

Hi, sorry I've not been on GRcade much -- I mostly kept to myself because I've been pretty negative and have lot of anxiety/depression issues still.

I've been out of job since January this year, granted that was expected because it was only year thing, and to be frank I'm relieved about that. Still sucks though because back to square one although gotta say living on my own with my boyfriend in our new place since April this year (I live in Kilmarnock now) I don't feel that *miserable* as I was back in Dalmellington? It's weird to explain because like when I'm still having issues I just don't feel it's bad as if I was staying at Dalmellington still. Nothing to do with my mum, she's saint. Just fed up of Dalmellington as whole.

But yeah lately I've been wanting to hang around on here again, though I may be still quiet at times. I'm starting to try to look at things in positive light though (although, not forcing myself to do that because that also spells disaster! I should've known), hopefully next year will help a bit when I get myself out there and look for jobs and sort out other issues I may have.

Travelodge bathroom doors have those ball catch things that stop the door from being latched shut properly.

I've been going to talking therapy the past few months now and I think it's been helping me get to grips on where my anxieties have been coming from and I've found myself wondering why I'm starting to panic when I start and calming myself down. I can't actually believe how much just talking has been helping me. The therapist herself is an absolute gem and I feel so at ease when I go in.

I also can't believe just how much stuff I've held in all this time. All this weird tension and upset I've held back from letting out is finally coming out of me and I'm feeling calmer and more like my old self before all this anxiety kicked in. It's been no wonder that the CBT hasn't helped me. I recommend trying it.

Seven Candles wrote:Hi, sorry I've not been on GRcade much -- I mostly kept to myself because I've been pretty negative and have lot of anxiety/depression issues still.

I've been out of job since January this year, granted that was expected because it was only year thing, and to be frank I'm relieved about that. Still sucks though because back to square one although gotta say living on my own with my boyfriend in our new place since April this year (I live in Kilmarnock now) I don't feel that *miserable* as I was back in Dalmellington? It's weird to explain because like when I'm still having issues I just don't feel it's bad as if I was staying at Dalmellington still. Nothing to do with my mum, she's saint. Just fed up of Dalmellington as whole.

But yeah lately I've been wanting to hang around on here again, though I may be still quiet at times. I'm starting to try to look at things in positive light though (although, not forcing myself to do that because that also spells disaster! I should've known), hopefully next year will help a bit when I get myself out there and look for jobs and sort out other issues I may have.

Good to have you back!

Being out of a job can be tough, and its hard to not despair if you are getting rejections. (it took me 10mths to find a job when I was unemployed - difficult when there are so many people going for the available jobs)

I totally get the moving from a small town thing! sometimes it can feel quite insular and it will be nice to have room to yourself. Is this the first time moving out of the family home?

A Beautiful Kezmas Tree wrote:Good to have you back!

Being out of a job can be tough, and its hard to not despair if you are getting rejections. (it took me 10mths to find a job when I was unemployed - difficult when there are so many people going for the available jobs)

I totally get the moving from a small town thing! sometimes it can feel quite insular and it will be nice to have room to yourself. Is this the first time moving out of the family home?

Thanks!

I feel it's bit more difficult for me for two/three factors in that I'm deaf, and the time I had job at Wilko (was Wilkinsons) kinda scarred me even though it's ages ago. I do still want a job though, mostly to be able to pay for stuff outside of rent/bills (which is covered alright), that and something to do instead of staying at home all time (granted with living in Kilmarnock it's easy to just go out for walk and do stuff and come back without needing to worry about bus times for once)

It's techically second time but anxiety hit me really bad first time I moved out, so moved back to mum's back in 2013. So this would be really my first time, was worried it'd go same way but having Kaz around helps a lot and despite being depressed/anxious it's still lot easier to cope with this time. Even if I don't know how to do stuff (which I'm getting better at)

So Im pretty sure Im having a nervous breakdown.
I got totally overwhelmed last night and spent nearly an hour in a layby talking to the Samaritans.
Im crying as I type and I really dont want to go on.

strawberry float this hurts.

I’ve been there dude, you are doing the right thing talking to people. For me, getting some sugar in you and having a lie down helps, sort of reboot your system.

I know it’s really elementary and you don’t want to hear it but it does pass. It’s happened to me twice this month but it gets better I promise.

Yeah what False said, also take your time too - you can do it

Mommy Christmas wrote:So Im pretty sure Im having a nervous breakdown.
I got totally overwhelmed last night and spent nearly an hour in a layby talking to the Samaritans.
Im crying as I type and I really dont want to go on.

strawberry float this hurts.

Sorry to hear this mate. Is it the family troubles you mentioned previously?

Regardless, False's advice is good. Additionally, is there anyone around you that you can reach out and speak with, or who might be able to direct you to seek help?