Vincent Hanna: And now, finally, a word with the man who is at the centre of this Eurovision mystery: the voter himself. And his name is Mr. E. Bla-- Mr. Blackadder, *you* are the only voter in this rotten contest...?
Edmund Blackadder: Yes, that's right.
VH: How long have you lived on this continent?
EB: Since Wednesday morning. I took over the previous electorate when he, very
sadly, accidentally brutally cut his head off while combing his hair.
VH: One voter, 323 points -- a slight anomaly...?
EB: Not really, Mr. Hanna. You see, the Ukrainian entry may look like a monkey who's been put in a suit and then strategically shaved, but she is a brilliant singer. The number of votes I cast is simply a reflection of how firmly I believe in her music.
VH: Well, that's excellent. Er, well, that's all for me -- another great day for democracy in Europe, Russia, Israel and Australia. Vincent Hanna, Swedish Gentleman's Ikea Meatballs Gazette, Stockholm.