Hello, and welcome to my review of "New Moon", the sequel to the teen vampire mega-smash Twilight. I saw that film, but I don't remember any of it as I was watching it from within an army tank at the time. I could only peer out the gun shaft, but it was pointed at my Norwegian hostages until the funds were deposited, so I couldn't see the screen at all. I know, I know; no one wants to hear that boring story. I will now delete it from my memory. BZRGETNENFEN. There.
Anyway, on to this film. I decided to take the subway, despite my city not having an underground train line of any kind. "I shall build one" I said to the mayor, who was asleep at the time. He woke up and called security, so I kicked him in the wrist and threw chairs at his squad of private goons. Success. Now all I had to do was implement a sophisticated underground rail system before 20:30. That's when the film starts, and I already booked my ticket. I know, I know, I know; no one wants to hear about my Super-Human Subway System, so I won't bore you with the details.
I took the train from the platform under my house all the way to Old Jilligers Station on the Muddles line. There's a map for my rail network, which contains:
RogueLeader Central - Station under my house The Muddles Line - Goes from RogueLeader Central to Old Jilligers Station Old Jilligers Station - Directly under the cinema
I took the escalator up from the train station to the cinema and bought a tray of nachos. Sharp triangles? When the BBFC rating came up on screen I zinged them at the projector and broke it. Everyone else booed at the situation, but I just cooed at my ingenuity. It was a great day out, and to make matters better the train home was relatively empty.