Relationship Thread V3 + Fade Broke Up With His Tortoise :(

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Curls
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PostRe: Relationship Thread V3 + Fade Broke Up With His Tortoise :(
by Curls » Sat Feb 08, 2020 1:32 am

You don't need to ask her friend. Asking somewhere like here is fair enough, or some of your mates not from the workplace, but a mutual friend, they'll have a different brain to you and may be seeking their own comfort in the workplace.

If you're looking for a confidence booster, then you could maybe TELL the mutual friend you're going to do it. But even then you're just adding a middleman(woman).

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Somebody Else's Problem
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PostRe: Relationship Thread V3 + Fade Broke Up With His Tortoise :(
by Somebody Else's Problem » Sat Feb 08, 2020 8:41 am

Buffalo wrote:I get it’s the 21st century and all that but girls love a bit of ownership.


Not true. The one I keep in my attic keeps complaining.

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That's not a growth
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PostRe: Relationship Thread V3 + Fade Broke Up With His Tortoise :(
by That's not a growth » Sat Feb 08, 2020 9:08 am

The way I'm reading it he's not asking the friend if he should, but if he shouldn't. The friend will be able to let him know if the person is in a relationship, or if he isn't the person's type- for example.

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Oblomov Boblomov
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PostRe: Relationship Thread V3 + Fade Broke Up With His Tortoise :(
by Oblomov Boblomov » Sat Feb 08, 2020 9:24 am

Yeah in all seriousness, I don't think it's actually a bad move to check in with the friend. It could help to talk it through with them and they'll obviously be much more aware of the context of the relationship than we are, so in a position to give advice.

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Knoyleo
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PostRe: Relationship Thread V3 + Fade Broke Up With His Tortoise :(
by Knoyleo » Sat Feb 08, 2020 9:29 am

Kezzer wrote:I am dating Knoyleo's wife and its working out okay

Always pleased to hear good feedback.

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PostRe: Relationship Thread V3 + Fade Broke Up With His Tortoise :(
by Rocsteady » Sat Feb 08, 2020 9:58 am

That's not a growth wrote:The way I'm reading it he's not asking the friend if he should, but if he shouldn't. The friend will be able to let him know if the person is in a relationship, or if he isn't the person's type- for example.

Exactly, it's clearly the safer option with no real downside.

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OnlyShallow
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PostRe: Relationship Thread V3 + Fade Broke Up With His Tortoise :(
by OnlyShallow » Sat Feb 08, 2020 9:59 am

Oblomov Boblomov wrote:
Cuttooth wrote:
Knoyleo wrote:
Fade wrote:Anyone ever dated someone from work? How did it go?

I met my wife when we worked at the same place, so it went OK.

Same but not married.

Same but married.

Same but divorced.

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Many Lives -> 49 MP wrote:People like you OnlyShallow are terrible banana splits. I hate you forever.
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Rocsteady
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PostRe: Relationship Thread V3 + Fade Broke Up With His Tortoise :(
by Rocsteady » Sat Feb 08, 2020 9:59 am

I'm not sure how it doesn't show ownership either, if you're confident enough to walk up to someone and ask them out they're not gonna say no because you previously mentioned the possibility to another friend.

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OnlyShallow
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PostRe: Relationship Thread V3 + Fade Broke Up With His Tortoise :(
by OnlyShallow » Sat Feb 08, 2020 10:09 am

Fade wrote:
Buffalo wrote:
Fade wrote:I'm going to ask a mutual friend of they think it would be a good idea to ask her out.


Oh for heavens sake, you’re not 14 years old any more.

No but I literally work in the same team as her. I work with her 10 hours a day. I'd rather not make things awkward at it hugely negatively effect my work.

Not really as simple as "hurr durr you're not 14"

This has disaster written all over it.

I think you should grasp the opportunity without a further thought. It's what I would do.

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Many Lives -> 49 MP wrote:People like you OnlyShallow are terrible banana splits. I hate you forever.
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Fade
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PostRe: Relationship Thread V3 + Fade Broke Up With His Tortoise :(
by Fade » Sat Feb 08, 2020 10:54 am

Rocsteady wrote:
That's not a growth wrote:The way I'm reading it he's not asking the friend if he should, but if he shouldn't. The friend will be able to let him know if the person is in a relationship, or if he isn't the person's type- for example.

Exactly, it's clearly the safer option with no real downside.

The only two sane people in this thread :lol:

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Jenuall
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PostRe: Relationship Thread V3 + Fade Broke Up With His Tortoise :(
by Jenuall » Sat Feb 08, 2020 11:11 am

Fade wrote:
Rocsteady wrote:
That's not a growth wrote:The way I'm reading it he's not asking the friend if he should, but if he shouldn't. The friend will be able to let him know if the person is in a relationship, or if he isn't the person's type- for example.

Exactly, it's clearly the safer option with no real downside.

The only two sane people in this thread :lol:

Not so sure myself. I'd be very wary of discussing this with a mutual friend beforehand as it's creating a trio of people who are in some way involved and that has repercussions for pretty much any outcome.

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Fade
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PostRe: Relationship Thread V3 + Fade Broke Up With His Tortoise :(
by Fade » Sat Feb 08, 2020 11:20 am

Jenuall wrote:
Fade wrote:
Rocsteady wrote:
That's not a growth wrote:The way I'm reading it he's not asking the friend if he should, but if he shouldn't. The friend will be able to let him know if the person is in a relationship, or if he isn't the person's type- for example.

Exactly, it's clearly the safer option with no real downside.

The only two sane people in this thread :lol:

Not so sure myself. I'd be very wary of discussing this with a mutual friend beforehand as it's creating a trio of people who are in some way involved and that has repercussions for pretty much any outcome.

Well the mutual friend is in charge of our team, so it would be in her best interest for her not to make a big thing put of it. It would just cause unneeded stress for her if she did.

She has another friend I could mention it too but I know for sure that one would blab :roll:

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OnlyShallow
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PostRe: Relationship Thread V3 + Fade Broke Up With His Tortoise :(
by OnlyShallow » Sat Feb 08, 2020 11:37 am

I'll say it again.

This has disaster written all over it.

In cap locks.

And it is being cc"d to everyone in your office.

And some 3rd party suppliers.

This might even go viral.

Go for it.

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Many Lives -> 49 MP wrote:People like you OnlyShallow are terrible banana splits. I hate you forever.
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False
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PostRe: Relationship Thread V3 + Fade Broke Up With His Tortoise :(
by False » Sat Feb 08, 2020 11:39 am

I’d just speak to the girl direct myself

Speaking to someone else seems like creating more opportunities for yourself to back out and more potential for grief from others

I’d go straight to the target and go for it

Bull by the horns and all that, go ed lad

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Corazon de Leon
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PostRe: Relationship Thread V3 + Fade Broke Up With His Tortoise :(
by Corazon de Leon » Sat Feb 08, 2020 11:41 am

OS is right, this has fuck-up written all over it.

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Buffalo
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PostRe: Relationship Thread V3 + Fade Broke Up With His Tortoise :(
by Buffalo » Sat Feb 08, 2020 12:30 pm

See?

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Cuttooth
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PostRe: Relationship Thread V3 + Fade Broke Up With His Tortoise :(
by Cuttooth » Sat Feb 08, 2020 1:06 pm

Fade wrote:Well the mutual friend is in charge of our team

Gut reaction is this makes it even worse. :dread:

Intimate relationships within teams can be a nightmare to work around for a team leader, and can make things awkward with others in the team. You strike me as someone who doesn’t particularly want to hear answers you don’t like, what happens if your mutual friend tries to dissuade you from making a move because it ultimately makes their life a bit easier?

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False
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PostRe: Relationship Thread V3 + Fade Broke Up With His Tortoise :(
by False » Sat Feb 08, 2020 1:18 pm

I just feel like general life advice is that you never get the prize if you meander around it and involve other randoms to give yourself chances to fail

you set your eyes on the goal (or poonani) and then you shoot your shot

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Fade
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PostRe: Relationship Thread V3 + Fade Broke Up With His Tortoise :(
by Fade » Sat Feb 08, 2020 1:40 pm

Cuttooth wrote:
Fade wrote:Well the mutual friend is in charge of our team

Gut reaction is this makes it even worse. :dread:

Intimate relationships within teams can be a nightmare to work around for a team leader, and can make things awkward with others in the team. You strike me as someone who doesn’t particularly want to hear answers you don’t like, what happens if your mutual friend tries to dissuade you from making a move because it ultimately makes their life a bit easier?

Exactly. Which is why I'm not being a twat and just asking her out. I don't want to make anyone else's work life more difficult.

I don't mind hearing stuff I don't like. I wouldn't be talking to my friend if that was the case right, I'd just go for it.

If she says she thinks it's a bad idea I'd just move on. In the past I would have just not done anything so I'm making progress :lol:

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False
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PostRe: Relationship Thread V3 + Fade Broke Up With His Tortoise :(
by False » Sat Feb 08, 2020 1:45 pm

but if you really like someone why would you let a friend deter you from that

Id just be like strawberry float my mate, my own happiness is my motive so why would I put their work life above me maybe having a life with the woman I could love

little fades running around and 80 years old in electric recliners, binned off because the manager didnt want any grief

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