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Re: So you've ruined your life...

Posted: Tue Sep 28, 2021 9:56 pm
by KingK
jiggles wrote:
KingK wrote:I had to try and perform the Heimlich manoeuvre on my 6ft 13yr old on Sat as he was choking on some chicken at dinner time.


Well at that age their hormones are running wild.

I’m glad you find the fact that my son was choking as something to laugh at.

strawberry floating twat.

Re: So you've ruined your life...

Posted: Tue Sep 28, 2021 10:22 pm
by jiggles
KingK wrote:
jiggles wrote:
KingK wrote:I had to try and perform the Heimlich manoeuvre on my 6ft 13yr old on Sat as he was choking on some chicken at dinner time.


Well at that age their hormones are running wild.

I’m glad you find the fact that my son was choking as something to laugh at.

strawberry floating twat.


Oh, sorry, I misread your post.

I assumed the Heimlich manoeuvre was like a wrestling move or something.

Re: So you've ruined your life...

Posted: Tue Sep 28, 2021 10:28 pm
by jiggles
Serious post though: I apologise sincerely. I can only imagine how horrific is is to see an actual nightmare unfold in real life before your eyes. It’s futile to say this but try not to linger on that abyssal pit in your stomach of worry. Events like this are just a part of life.

Re: So you've ruined your life...

Posted: Tue Sep 28, 2021 10:49 pm
by Green Gecko
Well boy that escalated quickly.

I understand that even the darker side of humour might be a potent relief for some parent related shenanigans but with regards to the well-being of children on the part of their loving parents (one would hope! My parents at times... hmmm), that's a spicy/testy way to curb it.

This thread is almost as much of a mod no man's land as the football thread. Just don't put the kids on the field and everything will be OK?

It's not the first casualty of words today either. And with that, I'm clocking off my actual job for the day (who knows which one that is).

Re: So you've ruined your life...

Posted: Sat Oct 09, 2021 10:03 pm
by Oblomov Boblomov
My lad rolled himself over from front to back today for the first time. Is that normal? He's not even three weeks old yet...

Re: So you've ruined your life...

Posted: Sat Oct 09, 2021 10:29 pm
by Tomous
Oblomov Boblomov wrote:My lad rolled himself over from front to back today for the first time. Is that normal? He's not even three weeks old yet...


That is extremely early! Usually they start doing that at around 3 months. Mine was born end of Sept and did it for the first time at Christmas.

Re: So you've ruined your life...

Posted: Sat Oct 09, 2021 10:39 pm
by Gemini73
Kids will always surprise you. I remember when my youngest, Lucy, first walked without support. She was just over 12 months old and still crawling when one evening, while the wife and myself were watching tele, Lucy just stood up off the floor and tottered across to her toy box. Completely took us by surprise as it was totally unexpected. The funny part, for us at least, was wondering how long she'd been able to do it. Now at 12 she's an awesome football player for Lakeside under 14s girls and boys.

Re: So you've ruined your life...

Posted: Sat Oct 09, 2021 11:00 pm
by jiggles
Oblomov Boblomov wrote:My lad rolled himself over from front to back today for the first time. Is that normal? He's not even three weeks old yet...


I can’t even picture the mechanics of this. Surely he’s not got the upper body strength to push himself away from the floor yet, or the neck strength to hold his head up.

Did his mum have a gym installed in her uterus?

Re: So you've ruined your life...

Posted: Sun Oct 10, 2021 12:12 am
by Oblomov Boblomov
Tomous wrote:
Oblomov Boblomov wrote:My lad rolled himself over from front to back today for the first time. Is that normal? He's not even three weeks old yet...


That is extremely early! Usually they start doing that at around 3 months. Mine was born end of Sept and did it for the first time at Christmas.


jiggles wrote:
Oblomov Boblomov wrote:My lad rolled himself over from front to back today for the first time. Is that normal? He's not even three weeks old yet...


I can’t even picture the mechanics of this. Surely he’s not got the upper body strength to push himself away from the floor yet, or the neck strength to hold his head up.

Did his mum have a gym installed in her uterus?

I'm still extremely confused myself. Everything on Google says it won't happen until about four months at the earliest.

A friend reckons it can happen in some cases and then they forget how to do it for a few months. The baby is only just back to birth weight after all the issues caused by the jaundice, so I wonder if it could be because he's relatively light at the moment.

Re: So you've ruined your life...

Posted: Sun Oct 10, 2021 12:15 am
by Tomous
To be honest, it's easier when they can't roll so fingers crossed he forgets for a few months ;)

Re: So you've ruined your life...

Posted: Sun Oct 10, 2021 9:28 am
by Errkal
Online stuff is a rough guide and generic. Each kid is different.

Moo didn't crawl and hated being on her front, in the hospital after being born she liked being held like she was standing and as she got bigger liked to sort of bounce on her legs you held her, she went straight to walking very early by holding furniture and shimmying around the room.

What the web says and even what health visitors say can be taken with a massive bucket of salt.

Christ if we listened to our health visitor we wouldn't have had much sleep at night as moo was sleeping through and not waking for food(so we have more food in the day to compensate and keep to the right amount) health visitor said we should be waking her up to feed her, which we decided to ignore as idiocy.

Re: So you've ruined your life...

Posted: Wed Oct 27, 2021 4:03 pm
by Super Dragon 64
We went for our first scan on Monday and *touch wood* all looks good. The expected due date was 1st May (my birthday) before the scan but is now 30th April. We're both very excited :toot: :toot: :toot:

Re: So you've ruined your life...

Posted: Wed Oct 27, 2021 4:04 pm
by Moggy
Super Dragon 64 wrote:We went for our first scan on Monday and *touch wood* all looks good. The expected due date was 1st May (my birthday) before the scan but is now 30th April. We're both very excited :toot: :toot: :toot:


Congrats :wub:

Re: So you've ruined your life...

Posted: Wed Oct 27, 2021 4:10 pm
by Cheeky Devlin
Congrats man.

Re: So you've ruined your life...

Posted: Wed Oct 27, 2021 4:12 pm
by Tomous
Congrats SD64!


Baby man is in nursery for the first time right now, 2 hour induction session before he starts properly :cry:

Re: So you've ruined your life...

Posted: Wed Oct 27, 2021 4:14 pm
by Prototype
Top shagger :datass:

Re: So you've ruined your life...

Posted: Wed Oct 27, 2021 4:15 pm
by Oblomov Boblomov
Well in, Super Dragon!

My little dude is an insatiable poo/wee/fart monster and is demanding pretty much 24/7 attention. It is thoroughly exhausting.

Re: So you've ruined your life...

Posted: Wed Oct 27, 2021 4:15 pm
by Jenuall
Congrats! :toot:

Re: So you've ruined your life...

Posted: Wed Oct 27, 2021 4:32 pm
by Tomous
Oblomov Boblomov wrote:My little dude is an insatiable poo/wee/fart monster and is demanding pretty much 24/7 attention.



Just like his Dad then no doubt :wub:

Re: So you've ruined your life...

Posted: Wed Oct 27, 2021 5:58 pm
by Oblomov Boblomov
Tomous wrote:
Oblomov Boblomov wrote:My little dude is an insatiable poo/wee/fart monster and is demanding pretty much 24/7 attention.



Just like his Dad then no doubt :wub:

I wish I could at least try to pretend that isn't true :slol:.