The moan about your neighbours thread - Stool Bloke returns...

Fed up talking videogames? Why?

Frame your neighbours for murder to get rid of them

Poll ended at Fri Mar 23, 2018 8:07 pm

Yes,they can rot in prison for disturbing my peace.
20
80%
No,invite them round for tea and monopoly.
5
20%
 
Total votes: 25
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Moggy
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PostRe: The moan about your neighbours thread - Stool Bloke returns...
by Moggy » Sat May 23, 2020 4:19 pm

Zilnad wrote:Funnily enough, that is my name :lol:


Alan?

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Prototype
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PostRe: The moan about your neighbours thread - Stool Bloke returns...
by Prototype » Sat May 23, 2020 5:56 pm

Zilnad wrote:Funnily enough, that is my name :lol:


Holy gooseberry fool. :lol:

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Balladeer
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PostRe: The moan about your neighbours thread - Stool Bloke returns...
by Balladeer » Sat May 23, 2020 6:36 pm

Zilnad wrote:Funnily enough, that is my name :lol:

:idea: Is your wife called Liz perchance...?

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PostRe: The moan about your neighbours thread - Stool Bloke returns...
by Zilnad » Sat May 23, 2020 7:58 pm

Balladeer wrote:
Zilnad wrote:Funnily enough, that is my name :lol:

:idea: Is your wife called Liz perchance...?


Looks like you've cracked the code. Please keep this information safe and use it not for evil.

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Zilnad
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PostRe: The moan about your neighbours thread - Stool Bloke returns...
by Zilnad » Sun May 24, 2020 3:27 pm

Neighbour has her daughter and grandchildren round in her garden today. She's been ignoring social distancing guidelines anyway so it's no surprise but I guess Dominic Cummings has made her go full on "strawberry float it". Her husband is in the high risk category, apparently, so on her head be it.

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Victor Mildew
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PostRe: The moan about your neighbours thread - Stool Bloke returns...
by Victor Mildew » Sun May 24, 2020 3:48 pm

Zilnad wrote:Neighbour has her daughter and grandchildren round in her garden today. She's been ignoring social distancing guidelines anyway so it's no surprise but I guess Dominic Cummings has made her go full on "strawberry float it". Her husband is in the high risk category, apparently, so on her head be it.


Bin bint pulled up in her car with her mum earlier, along with her daughter. They were carrying stuff that looked like they'd been out to the beach or something. The mum does not live with them.

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Zilnad
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PostRe: The moan about your neighbours thread - Stool Bloke returns...
by Zilnad » Mon May 25, 2020 3:47 pm

Next door are having yet another family gathering on their front lawn. They've set a BBQ up and filled their lawn with deck chairs and tables right in front of our living room window. I'm getting strawberry float sick of it now. We're just chilling in our garden at the minute but when we decide to go indoors we'll have to have our windows and curtains closed.

At least they haven't called over the fence to us today.

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PostRe: The moan about your neighbours thread - Stool Bloke returns...
by Dual » Mon May 25, 2020 3:56 pm

Zilnad wrote:Next door are having yet another family gathering on their front lawn. They've set a BBQ up and filled their lawn with deck chairs and tables right in front of our living room window. I'm getting strawberry float sick of it now. We're just chilling in our garden at the minute but when we decide to go indoors we'll have to have our windows and curtains closed.

At least they haven't called over the fence to us today.


Maybe they were trying to tell you about todays barbecue :(

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Victor Mildew
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PostRe: The moan about your neighbours thread - Stool Bloke returns...
by Victor Mildew » Mon May 25, 2020 4:14 pm

I don't know how people can just endlessly be doing DIY. It's a beautiful day, just shut the strawberry float up and enjoy it for 5 minutes without hammering or using an angle grinder or sawing something. strawberry floating hell.

Yesterday was absolute bliss becuase I think the entire road did a Cummings and went to the beach all day. Not a single sound outside bar a bird tweeting or a bee merrily buzzing through the air. Today though, for strawberry float sake.

BANG BANG BANG SAW SAW SAW GRRRRRRRRRNNNNNEEEEEAAAAAAWWWWWWWWW BANG BANG BANG

Hexx wrote:Ad7 is older and balder than I thought.
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PostRe: The moan about your neighbours thread - Stool Bloke returns...
by Vermilion » Mon May 25, 2020 7:06 pm

Victor Mildew wrote:I don't know how people can just endlessly be doing DIY. It's a beautiful day, just shut the strawberry float up and enjoy it for 5 minutes without hammering or using an angle grinder or sawing something. strawberry floating hell.

Yesterday was absolute bliss becuase I think the entire road did a Cummings and went to the beach all day. Not a single sound outside bar a bird tweeting or a bee merrily buzzing through the air. Today though, for strawberry float sake.

BANG BANG BANG SAW SAW SAW GRRRRRRRRRNNNNNEEEEEAAAAAAWWWWWWWWW BANG BANG BANG


Maybe it's a west country thing, but this happens around here every time the sun comes out, and don't even get me started on the shitting bonfires every evening!

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grog monster 64
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PostRe: The moan about your neighbours thread - Stool Bloke returns...
by grog monster 64 » Mon May 25, 2020 9:19 pm

My next-door neighbour’s cat is using my garden as a toilet. It’s been a few months now, and it’s starting to really get to me. 4-6 scrumps of gooseberry fool per session, twice a day, buried in grass that the little banana split has torn up. I just came in from my evening pick-up, and it was all I could do not to fling it right over the wall. Aargh.

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PostRe: The moan about your neighbours thread - Stool Bloke returns...
by Chocolate-Milk » Mon May 25, 2020 11:40 pm

grog monster 64 wrote:My next-door neighbour’s cat is using my garden as a toilet. It’s been a few months now, and it’s starting to really get to me. 4-6 scrumps of gooseberry fool per session, twice a day, buried in grass that the little banana split has torn up. I just came in from my evening pick-up, and it was all I could do not to fling it right over the wall. Aargh.

Get a shovel and fling it back over the fence.


Then post the gooseberry fool through their letterbox.

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Zilnad
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PostRe: The moan about your neighbours thread - Stool Bloke returns...
by Zilnad » Tue May 26, 2020 11:58 am

Chocolate-Milk wrote:
grog monster 64 wrote:My next-door neighbour’s cat is using my garden as a toilet. It’s been a few months now, and it’s starting to really get to me. 4-6 scrumps of gooseberry fool per session, twice a day, buried in grass that the little banana split has torn up. I just came in from my evening pick-up, and it was all I could do not to fling it right over the wall. Aargh.

Get a shovel and fling it back over the fence.


Then post the gooseberry fool through their letterbox.


That would be a really dick move. As annoying as it is, it's next to impossible to control what cats get up to outside of their home. Just deal with it and don't be an arsehole. Maybe put some citronella down or some other kind of scent for deterring cats.

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PostRe: The moan about your neighbours thread - Stool Bloke returns...
by Chocolate-Milk » Tue May 26, 2020 12:06 pm

Zilnad wrote:
Chocolate-Milk wrote:
grog monster 64 wrote:My next-door neighbour’s cat is using my garden as a toilet. It’s been a few months now, and it’s starting to really get to me. 4-6 scrumps of gooseberry fool per session, twice a day, buried in grass that the little banana split has torn up. I just came in from my evening pick-up, and it was all I could do not to fling it right over the wall. Aargh.

Get a shovel and fling it back over the fence.


Then post the gooseberry fool through their letterbox.


That would be a really dick move. As annoying as it is, it's next to impossible to control what cats get up to outside of their home. Just deal with it and don't be an arsehole. Maybe put some citronella down or some other kind of scent for deterring cats.

I meant fling the cat.

I was joking.

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grog monster 64
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PostRe: The moan about your neighbours thread - Stool Bloke returns...
by grog monster 64 » Tue May 26, 2020 12:18 pm

Yeah, I’m definitely not going to lob gooseberry fool over the wall. I’ve tried anti pet spray, which seems citronella-based, and it’s done nothing. Looking at getting frequency-emitters that, while inaudible to humans, are apparently unpleasant enough to deter most small animals. It’s got to be better than ferreting about with a bin bag over my hand picking up cat squelch. I know this is a moan about your neighbours thread, so to be fair they are very apologetic, and good sorts. I can’t imagine living next to Stool Bloke and Cake Poster.

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Victor Mildew
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PostRe: The moan about your neighbours thread - Stool Bloke returns...
by Victor Mildew » Tue May 26, 2020 12:31 pm

Nobody was genuinely suggesting anyone should throw gooseberry fool over a wall!

Hexx wrote:Ad7 is older and balder than I thought.
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Drumstick
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PostRe: The moan about your neighbours thread - Stool Bloke returns...
by Drumstick » Tue May 26, 2020 12:45 pm

grog monster 64 wrote:Yeah, I’m definitely not going to lob gooseberry fool over the wall. I’ve tried anti pet spray, which seems citronella-based, and it’s done nothing. Looking at getting frequency-emitters that, while inaudible to humans, are apparently unpleasant enough to deter most small animals. It’s got to be better than ferreting about with a bin bag over my hand picking up cat squelch. I know this is a moan about your neighbours thread, so to be fair they are very apologetic, and good sorts. I can’t imagine living next to Stool Bloke and Cake Poster.

You should ask the owners of the cat what they use.

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Tomous
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PostRe: The moan about your neighbours thread - Stool Bloke returns...
by Tomous » Tue May 26, 2020 12:57 pm

I really like cats and would probably get one if my missus liked them but when you think about it, it is pretty outrageous someone else's pet can wander into your garden and gooseberry fool everywhere :lol:

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Red
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PostRe: The moan about your neighbours thread - Stool Bloke returns...
by Red » Tue May 26, 2020 12:59 pm

We just used to chuck a bowl of water at any that strayed in the garden, tended to deter them. You've got to be alert though, and able to dash out quickly to issue the drenching.

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Jenuall
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PostRe: The moan about your neighbours thread - Stool Bloke returns...
by Jenuall » Tue May 26, 2020 1:09 pm

If my neighbours cat starts shitting in my garden then all bets are off! If you get a pet then that comes with a degree of burden, it's not a wild animal it's your pet and you are responsible for it!

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