The moan about your neighbours thread - Stool Bloke returns...

[dmin]

Please don't do any of the above options, just keep reporting in here. This is comedy gold!

[Moggy]

Where the strawberry float do you live

Inside a Daily Star front page.

Sunday Sport more like

[imbusydoctorwho]

The other day we had a new family moved down the road, a bloke and his wife and 3 kids. The woman and the kids seem okay but the guy has 2 old cars outside the house for scrap, he's been pissing about with the cars at 3 am making all sorts of noise. We asked him to do the work in the daytime but he says it's a free country and he can do what ever he likes, all today and yesterday the kids have been playing loud music all day since 6am. If it continues them we'll contact the council.

As for the Costa Woman she's been busy buying up all the Easter Eggs in the local shops, she has well over 100 Eggs all in her Garage. She told us she went into Sainsbury's today to get some cheap eggs, but they'd pretty much sold out, so she dashed around the shop looking for people with eggs in their trolleys and nicking the eggs whilst they're not looking. She said a staff member had a go at her for doing it and told her to return them, so she tipped her trolley on the floor with all the shopping spread on the floor. She told us that she got a bottle of milk and threw the milk on the stuff and said to the staff member they could keep it and stormed out the shop.

Anyway her new partner, an 18 year old, had a word with me and all the neighbours today about the Costa Lady. Basically saying that whilst she's a very attractive lady (hint she isn't) but we need to contain ourselves when we see her, as he's all the man she needs.

[Prototype]

I live in a block of flats with 12 properties and I do not have this level of info on any of my neighbours

Are you at the window all day?

I would genuinely call the non-emergency police number if someone is pissing about at 3am making noise.

[imbusydoctorwho]

I live in a neighbourhood where as soon as you open the door and step in your garden or front garden, somebody is desperate to speak to you.

One of the guys who lives a few doors down, wanted to show me some cakes he got from Tesco, ended up talking to him for half an hour.

[Zilnad]

Hell sounds preferable.

[rinks]

Rogue Leader’s stories were more believable.

[Albear]

Indeed

[Balladeer]

I live in London and never mind all the other stuff: neighbours wanting to talk to you for half an hour?

[Victor Mildew]

I used to live next door to a woman who'd be waiting on her doorstep to talk to you the second you returned from being out (terraced houses so her door was about 5 ft from ours) and she'd talk at you for a minimum of half an hour, sometimes for over an hour. Imagine that every time you got home. It got to the point we started using the back of the house as the main way in so we could sneak in and out without her seeing.

[Hypes]

I always thought Wisbech was posh

[Poncho]

Rogue Leader’s stories were more believable.

He jumped the shark with that 'all the man she needs' ending.

[Benzin]

I live in London and never mind all the other stuff: neighbours wanting to talk to you for half an hour?

I can just about cope with talking to other people when walking the dog, but the neighbours

[Jenuall]

I live in London and never mind all the other stuff: neighbours wanting to talk to you for half an hour?

I can just about cope with talking to other people when walking the dog, but the neighbours

Ugh, this is one of the worst things for me - the unwritten rule that all dog walkers are fair game for ad-hoc socialising.

You can see them coming a mile off, the way they look at you from a distance - that chirpy "hey, lets have a chin-wag" smirk that comes across their face as they zero in on you, even when you're in a massive field or park with more than enough space for everyone to leave each other alone. The one's who actively change course to intercept you - altering their route around a field or even crossing the road just to annoy you... I want to walk my dog in peace, leave me the strawberry float alone!

[Nibble]

Wear a MAGA hat.

[Jenuall]

A plan with no drawbacks!

[Chocolate-Milk]

Make the dog wear a muzzle.


And a MAGA hat

[imbusydoctorwho]

I always thought Wisbech was posh

It use to be okay years ago, but now it's pretty rough. The town centre is mostly where all the the drunks sit all day, the town's folk have a thing for crapping allo over the place, they've done it in the car park, water fountain and even in the town's church. I never leave the car alone in the town centre as there's always kids smacking up cars.

Anyway the old Costa Woman has took the car that isn't taxed or insured out on the road with her young kid, so I've reported it and got the neighbour next door to do the same.

[Prototype]

Not buying any of this now.

[Jenuall]

When you brought the car into the shitting conversation I thought we were heading for a Chicago Sunroof situation!