GRcade

And what about when you're a guys house and only notice afterwards there's what's clearly wedding photo on the wall, pictures of a couple throughout the house etc? Huh Jenuall? HUH!?!?!

Or when you're basking in the afterglow at a guys and he reaches to pull a throw down, and pulls it of the empty pram it was covering? HUH? HUH? What then Jenuall?

Or what about when you realise you've (unknowing that anyone was married) had separate encounters with both half a male/male marraige? What do you say then?

Edit. These are all hypothetical. Obviously.

Jenuall wrote:

Moggy wrote:

Jenuall wrote:

Moggy wrote:

Hexx wrote:Also - aren't you two talking differently?

Moggy seems to be talking about meeting a random in the nightclub with minimal discussion interaction beyond...the event.

GG seems to be talking more about someone going "I'm married but looking to play away - you in?" type encounter

I think we’re talking about different things, but they can be linked. If the wife cheats and tells the guy that she’s married and looking to play away, then I’d still go with what I said above.

I still think the guy in that situation is being a dick. He's basically making the judgement call that his need to get some action is worth more than the security of any third parties who may be damaged by the act.

No he’s not. He’s met a random woman, she’s told him she’s married but looking to strawberry float and he’s just gone along with it. He doesn’t know her husband, it’s nothing to do with him.

Really? Not personally knowing the people who will be potentially harmed by your actions is reason enough to justify potentially strawberry floating up their lives?

The guy is consenting to an act that he knows has a good chance of hurting people, I don't see how that can be seen as a wholly honorable thing.

Nobody has claimed it to be honourable, but it’s not the single persons fault (if they don’t know them).

Hexx wrote:And what about when you're a guys house and only notice afterwards there's what's clearly wedding photo on the wall, pictures of a couple throughout the house etc? Huh Jenuall? HUH!?!?!

Or when you're basking in the afterglow at a guys and he reaches to pull a throw down, and pulls it of the empty pram it was covering? HUH? HUH? What then Jenuall?

Edit. These are hypothetical. Obviously.

The only honourable course of action in those situations is to commit seppuku.

As stated earlier I think if the cheater has hidden their relationship status and is actively engaging in a deception to get someone to sleep with them then that is all on them, the person they get into a one night stand is in the clear then.

However if they reveal their status, or there is sufficient reason to believe that they are in a relationship, have kids etc. then I think the other person needs to seriously consider the implications of proceeding at that point.

Jenuall wrote:As stated earlier I think if the cheater has hidden their relationship status and is actively engaging in a deception to get someone to sleep with them then that is all on them.

Again you're making assumptuons. What if no one lied or deceived. It just wasn't mentioned.

Or do you ask every potentially fun buddy "Are you married" or "Is there a pre existing relationship I'm putting at risk?"

You must be fun at parties

Moggy wrote:

Hexx wrote:Also - aren't you two talking differently?

Moggy seems to be talking about meeting a random in the nightclub with minimal discussion interaction beyond...the event.

GG seems to be talking more about someone going "I'm married but looking to play away - you in?" type encounter

I think we’re talking about different things, but they can be linked. If the wife cheats and tells the guy that she’s married and looking to play away, then I’d still go with what I said above.

I’d fall differently on this - if someone knowingly gets involved with a married person, then they’re knowingly getting involved in something that could have serious negative implications on the lives of others beyond that situation. Whether you personally know them or not, I think that’s a dick move.

Obviously everyone has a different sense of morality on stuff like this and the onus is still massively on the person who is married not to play away, but I wouldn’t say that the third party is blameless if they know the situation in advance. I’d be pretty pissed off at both my partner and the other person if I found out she’d been with someone else at any point.

EDIT: If the other person didn’t know about it beforehand then I’d say they were completely not at fault though, obviously.

I’m response to a post my mate shared from 4ch*n advising this as a dark joke.

I spaffed in the face of a Jessie doll (Toy Story) and left it there. This meant that when I left the room she couldn’t clean it off and give away the fact she was really alive.

Hexx wrote:

Jenuall wrote:As stated earlier I think if the cheater has hidden their relationship status and is actively engaging in a deception to get someone to sleep with them then that is all on them.

Again you're making assumptuons. What if no one lied or deceived. It just wasn't mentioned.

Or do you ask every potentially fun buddy "Are you married" or "Is there a pre existing relationship I'm putting at risk?"

You must be fun at parties

I would like to cite the "sufficient reason to suspect" clause from my earlier statement on this matter.

If the "fun buddy" has made comments during conversation or there is sufficient external evidence (wedding ring, picture of family in wallet, calls/text from an obvious spouse etc.) which makes it apparent that this person may not actually be "young, free and single" then I think there is some onus on the other party to check what they are getting into.

If someone were to drop hints during a night out that there were some other reason to not bang them, like constantly itching their nether-regions, making extreme comments like "down with the West!" or being Welsh, then you would maybe make a body swerve on that one. I see this as the same thing - the person may be entwined in some other stuff, steer clear.

EDIT: also I am plenty fun at parties. Once at a party in uni I drank two different kinds of drink in one night!

Crazy times!

im totally with Jenuall on this

After much deliberation, I think these things should be assessed on a case by case basis.

Dat pragmatism.

Heart wrote:So we found this hotel, it was a place I knew well
We made magic that night. Oh, he did everything right
He brought the woman out of me, so many times, easily
And in the morning when he woke all I left him was a note
I told him I am the flower you are the seed
We walked in the garden we planted a tree
Don't try to find me, please don't you dare
Just live in my memory, you'll always be there

The perfect date! A great shag with no strings! BUT THERE'S A TWIST

Then it happened one day, we came round the same way
You can imagine his surprise when he saw his own eyes
I said please, please understand
I'm in love with another man
And what he couldn't give me
was the one little thing that you can

Snakes with tits.

So in summary: it can be hard to tell.

Plough him/her first and worry about the technicalities later.