STORYTELLERS a forum game *Clarkman wins*

Fed up talking videogames? Why?
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PostRe: STORYTELLERS a forum game *Day Two - Clarkman*
by Years of Username Limbo » Mon Feb 11, 2019 3:03 pm

It looks like you're off to the library, hulo, but we're no closer to having nominated a boat-finder. Do you want to vote for somebody?

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DarkRula
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PostRe: STORYTELLERS a forum game *Day Two - Clarkman*
by DarkRula » Mon Feb 11, 2019 3:04 pm

How do you know you'll be offed? Maybe the person who goes for the boat trips and falls down a hole. That's the fun of it. There's always going to be the unexpected.

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PostRe: STORYTELLERS a forum game *Day Two - Clarkman*
by OrangeRKN » Mon Feb 11, 2019 3:31 pm

A nice warm library sounds a significantly safer place to spend the night than wandering the shores of a choppy lake in the dark.

Hulohot is definitely getting eaten by the librarian

Vote count for the boat finder is currently:

1 - Somebody Else's Problem
1 - Drumstick

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mic
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PostRe: STORYTELLERS a forum game *Day Two - Clarkman*
by mic » Mon Feb 11, 2019 3:53 pm

Right, someone has to get us down there, so I’ll volunteer to go find the boat.

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PostRe: STORYTELLERS a forum game *Day Two - Clarkman*
by OrangeRKN » Mon Feb 11, 2019 3:57 pm

Well I won't argue with that! I'll switch my vote to mic

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PostRe: STORYTELLERS a forum game *Day Two - Clarkman*
by Years of Username Limbo » Mon Feb 11, 2019 4:58 pm

OK, I'll vote for mic too. Better a willing participant!

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PostRe: STORYTELLERS a forum game *Day Two - Clarkman*
by mic » Mon Feb 11, 2019 5:06 pm

Don’t hold me back, guys! Guys...? :|

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PostRe: STORYTELLERS a forum game *Day Two - Clarkman*
by Hulohot » Mon Feb 11, 2019 5:25 pm

It's ok Mic, we will be fine! *Votes mic*

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PostRe: STORYTELLERS a forum game *Day Two - Clarkman*
by Jenuall » Mon Feb 11, 2019 5:39 pm

Hulohot for the library and mic on boat duty then? Sounds like a solid plan to me!

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PostRe: STORYTELLERS a forum game *Day Two - Clarkman*
by Years of Username Limbo » Mon Feb 11, 2019 5:42 pm

(I know this is perhaps premature, but in case I'm busy after 9pm - which is very likely - I'd really like to be tomorrow's storyteller, so if I don't formally announce a candidacy, please consider me! :) )

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PostRe: STORYTELLERS a forum game *Day Two - Clarkman*
by Hulohot » Mon Feb 11, 2019 5:49 pm

I'd love to be storyteller at some point too, if after tonight my face hasn't been skinned from my lifeless corpse and wrapped around a book inked in my blood, with my spine hole repeatedly raped by spooky library demon ghosts.

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PostRe: STORYTELLERS a forum game *Day Two - Clarkman*
by Somebody Else's Problem » Mon Feb 11, 2019 6:01 pm

I'm happy to go and find the boat.

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mic
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PostRe: STORYTELLERS a forum game *Day Two - Clarkman*
by mic » Mon Feb 11, 2019 6:55 pm

Be my guest :-)

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PostRe: STORYTELLERS a forum game *Day Two - Clarkman*
by Clarkman » Mon Feb 11, 2019 7:38 pm

Not long to go. Are we doing this on a volunteer basis or actual votes in the thread?

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PostRe: STORYTELLERS a forum game *Day Two - Clarkman*
by Years of Username Limbo » Mon Feb 11, 2019 7:46 pm

Depends if volunteering counts as a vote for yourself. Is that allowed?

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PostRe: STORYTELLERS a forum game *Day Two - Clarkman*
by Clarkman » Mon Feb 11, 2019 7:56 pm

As it stands, these are the votes

Library

Hulohot (4 - Hulohot, Quantum Name, OrangeRKN, Jenuall)

Boat

mic (3 - OrangeRKN, Quantum Name, Jenuall)
Somebody Else’s Problem (2 - Somebody Else’s Problem, mic)

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PostRe: STORYTELLERS a forum game *Day Two - Clarkman*
by Years of Username Limbo » Mon Feb 11, 2019 8:39 pm

Oh, I hadn't spotted that mic had swapped his vote. In which case, I'm happy to do the same, and put SEP up as originally intended.

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PostRe: STORYTELLERS a forum game *Day Two - Clarkman*
by Clarkman » Mon Feb 11, 2019 8:51 pm

I've gone fairly meme heavy. This might not make too much sense to new members :slol:

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PostRe: STORYTELLERS a forum game *Day Two - Clarkman*
by OrangeRKN » Mon Feb 11, 2019 8:59 pm

I'm excited :toot:

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PostRe: STORYTELLERS a forum game *Day Two - Clarkman*
by Clarkman » Mon Feb 11, 2019 9:08 pm

Day Two - Conclusion

Hulohot approaches the grand, oak doors of the Great Library and confidently lifts the door knocker. He raps down on the wood twice, three times, then twice more in quick succession.

A stirring can be heard inside. A voice comes from behind the door.

“The secret knock is a sign of power,
Who dares to disturb us at this late hour?”

“Baron, it’s me, Hulohot, you old fool. Open the door and let me in.”

The door opens an inch, exposing a shadowed face. It is the keeper of the library, The Baron of Rhymes. Upon seeing the familiar face of his old friend, he opens the door, smiling, pulling Hulohot inside by the hand.

“It has been some time since I shook this hand,
how is your child, your wife, your land?”

“The kingdom of GRcade is suffering, Baron. Our membership is falling, and Lagamorph still posts in the Pics and Gifs thread. But there is hope - a long forgotten thread was bumped last week by the divine bots. There was ancient text, talking of the fabled GRail. We have ventured forth to find the GRail and unite the forum once more.”

“The GRail?” says the Baron, his face suddenly drained of colour.

“You know of the GRail? You must help me old friend!”

“Be careful, friend, of this grave quest,
the GRail is bound by rules and tests.”

“There was another man who spoke of rules – he murdered one of our party in cold blood and froze another. He said he was part of an organisation called RELIC. You must come with us to help on our journey!”

“No, no,” says the Baron, taking a step back into the library. “I have the wisdom only of books and tales,
The legends of Grailtopia and those who failed.
The one you met, the wandering knight,
The was a Mod, that devil blight.
They seek only to derail and and ban,
To quiet every daring man.
You poor shot friend – an IP block,
Your frozen friend – a classic lock.
RELIC stands for
To challenge Mods is not in vogue,
But there’s one who can – the Mod of Rogue!
He is a traitor and a sneak,
But holds the keys for what you seek.
The Rogue will help you pass the test,
For he knows their ways by far the best.
You’ll find him at the Inn of Nood,
Across the lake – they serve good food!
Just greet him with a humble rhyme,
He’ll know I sent you, and spare you time.”

“Thank you, old friend,” says Hulohot. “A thousand thanks! May I bring my party inside?”

“Libraries are public, and I’m not controlling!
Stick around, and we’ll go bowling.”

-----------

By the lake, Somebody Else’s Problem walks the shoreline. A distance away, he sees a moored rowboat bobbing on the wake, tied loosely to a pole in the ground. The vessel is painted in Red and Yellow stripes. Up close, Somebody Else’s Problem can read a name painted on the hull: the SS Puyol.

There is no sign of human life for as far as Somebody Else’s Problem can see. He approaches the boat and begins to untangle the ship from its harness.

But as he fights with the rope, the water stirs. A figure rises from the depths – in a full Barcelona kit, holding a pint of Larger in one hand, and a sword in the other.

“What the Strawberry Float do you think you’re doing with my boat, you tool? I’m Dblock of the Lake. I could toast you right here just for touching my property.”

“I mean no harm, great spirit,” Somebody Else’s Problem says, cowering. “I wish only safe passage for my party. We are headed west, towards Grailtopia.”

“Yeah, I hear that. But champions like me don’t let Stawberry Floaters float without a toll. I don’t put up with it from those RELIC losers and I won’t put up with it from you.”

“What does RELIC stand for, spirit?”

“They’re the Regulatory Enforcers of Lawful Imposed Control – the Mods. Wastemen. And you look like one of them.”

“I assure you I am not. What are your demands, spirit?”

“I demand that you get Christen Eriksen to sign for Barcelona in the Summer Transfer Window. Either than or human sacrifice. It’s all good, bruv.”

“But spirit, Daniel Levy will never let the Dane go!”

“Then your choice is made, innit. For the good of the team and that.”

“Do I have your word spirit, that my sacrifice will ensure the safety of my comrades.”

“I swear on Messi’s left foot. Now step forth into my domain. I’m going to pick the flesh from your batty little bones.”


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